run away

[Guest]

Well, Me and My Mom never got along so i always think about running away. I have a boyfriend he's the best i could ever ask for, we been to together for year. I hate that i cant be happy in my own house, and do what i want. It's like i have to make her happy, like she wants me to be like her, the things she messed up on she wanted me to do, like it's her life. When ever i do stand up for my self, she calls me b****, h**{Edited for language and context}, ugly, anythingg just to make me feel bad about myself. So My boyfriend always knows how to make me feel better, i think that's why we're so perfect for each other, he hates my mom so much, he hates how she talks to me and he stands up to her for me. Then sometimes i go days without eating cause it's stuff i really don't eat or i'll get sick and that's the stuff she buys. She buys all this stuff she likes and gets her food when i haven't even had any. I wish i could just run away with out her trying to find me, and try to take me away from the people i love. It's hard to explain the hell i put up with, like i just want to be happy and i think running away is the only way to do that.

[ccsmod0]

Re: run away

Thank you for posting a bulletin and we are glad that you reached out to us during this difficult time. It sounds like you and your mom haven’t had a very good relationship. It is understandable that home would feel unhappy place to be especially when you are being called bad names. It seems like your boyfriend has been a great support for you and can relate to how you feel. It is nice to have someone that understands us when we are going through hard times. It sounds like you have thought about runaway. Here are some things to think about before leaving:

• What else can I do to improve my home situation before I leave?
• What would make me stay at home?
• How will I survive?
• Is running away safe?
• Who can I count on to help me?
• Am I being realistic?
• Have I given this enough thought?
• What are my other options?
• If I end up in trouble, who will I call?
• When I return home, what will happen?

Have you ever run away before? We want you to be safe whether you decide to leave or stay. Do you think your mom would file a runaway report with the police? Running away is not illegal, but it is considered a status offense. This means that the police will take the report and keep it in their data base. If they pick you up for anything and run your name, then they would see that you are a runaway. Mostly they would return you back home. If home is not safe then the police might contact Child Protective Services or if you have any other legal concerns then they might detain you in juvenile detention. Also by making that runaway report, your mom has the right to charge the person (s) that is housing you with “harboring a runway” and/or “contributing to the delinquency of a minor”.

Everyone has the right to feel safe at home and it sounds like you haven’t been able to eat. Have you talked to anyone aside from your boyfriend about things home? There are services that can ensure that home is safe for you. One of them is Child Protective Services. The purpose of CPS is to identify, treat, and reduce child abuse and or neglect, as well as to ensure that reasonable efforts are made to protect and maintain children in their own homes. You can make a report with CPS of any abuse and/or neglect. The calls can be made anonymous, so that your confidentiality is maintained. Also anyone that has witness or knows of the abuse can also make a report on your behalf. CPS will take the information and determine what their next step will be. You can ask them also what they will do next. The more information you can provide to CPS will help to build her case. You can contact Child Help USA at 1-800-4-A-CHILD (422-4453) or you can view their website: http://www.childhelp.org/ for more information. If you feel like you’re in immediate danger, then you should call 911.

Another service that is outside of the police and CPS is called Justice for the Children. It is a national child advocacy organization to help youth when there might be inadequate and/or failure to protect a child from abuse or neglect. They can be reached at 1-800-733-0059 or you can view their website at: http://www.justiceforchildren.org .

We are a 24/7 non-judging, anonymous and confidential crisis line. We can help process through situation, discuss option in more detail, provide local resources/referrals and help in making conference calls to other services or agencies. We want you to feel safe in contacting us if you would like to talk more about your situation or anything else you want to talk about. However, we do let our callers know that if we get identifying information (age, city, state, address, phone number and name (s) of alleged abuser (s)), then we would be mandated to report abuse. Other mandated report, which means the following people/agencies by law would have to report any or alleged abuse/neglect: Social Services, teachers, counselors, doctors. We do not determine what is or is not abuse though. We are here for support and to be a listening ear if you want to call. Our number is 1-800RUNAWAY (786-2929). You are welcome to call at any time and we look forward in hear from you. We wish you the best and want you to be safe!

Take care,
~NRS