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I don't know what to be around anymore

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  • I don't know what to be around anymore

    I've never felt so depressed in my life. I've been trying to figure out ways to disappear. I feel like everything that I do is a failure. I don't make anyone's life easier and I don't rhink I'll be able to be the person I want to be, a doctor. Throughout the five years of college, I've struggled to find a way to do better and I promised myself that this semester was going to be the semester that I do well. I haven't been doing well... On top of that, I recently got engaged, but I don't feel like I'm good enough for him. If I weren't religious, I honestly would have killed myself, but I know that I wouldn't bring myself to do it. I've been thinking about running away for awhile, but I tried to figure out a way to pursue another life. I want to change my name, the way I look, and any other aspect about me, so no one could ever find me. I thought about how much relief I'd bring myself if I just did it. I know that I'd hurt people along the way and that's another thing that is stopping me. I don't want anyone to be scarred, I just don't want to be around anymore. I don't trust anyone enough to tell anyone about how I feel. Is there any way that I could run away to a safe and far place? Is there a way that I could prevent family members and friends from trying to look for me? I don't want them to look. I don't want them to waste any money or time. I just want to leave

  • #2
    Reply: I don't know what to be around anymore

    Hello,

    We are sorry to hear that you have been going through what sounds like a very difficult time.
    Sometimes it helps to have support and a place where you feel you can talk about your feelings.
    If you would like to get information on support services that fit your needs please give NRS a call at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929).

    NRS provides crisis intervention to runaway/homeless youth 21 and under by helping them to become safe and off the streets. If by chance you are above our age range you might consider dialing 3-1-1 United Way for services in your area.
    Sometimes things can feel overwhelming and it is hard to figure out a solution.
    We are glad to hear that you opted out of hurting yourself. It must have taken a lot of strength to get through those feelings. Good for you.

    Should you struggle with those thoughts again you might consider contacting the National Suicide Hotline 1-800-273-8255.
    We hope that things will begin to get better for you.

    Take Care,
    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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