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  • The next few years..

    Hello, i'm planning on leaving home in about 3 to 4 years, my boyfriend lives in germany, and i'm in america, we have been online chatting and using things like skype to voice and see eachother, he is in apprenticeship and will be done in 3 years, he will come over and take me from home, i love him so much. I'm a guy, and can be considered gay to some extent, however i myself have been planning to get operation on myself, and make me "female" its something i want myself, and have told him about it and he does not mind if i do it or not and he will support me all he can while i do it, he even already calls me "she" and "her", however i will do the operation once we are together in 3-4 years. my family does not know any of this, they will never understand me liking him, they will never understand me liking a dude, they do not know anything on me wanting to become female, they do not know about me running away they just will never understand and im afraid to come out, they treat me harsh like im pathetic and i will never do anything "good" in their eyes. and im trying to get a job, and drop out of school, however they are making me do my 3rd year of 9th grade, i have not passed because of my emotinal state im in, im suffering depression through all of this and have wanted to end myself mutiple times, i cry every night, hugging my pillow kissing it like it was my BF, I'm currently 17, my BF is 19. im planning on when he comes over, he will come to my house and i will runaway with him in the middle of the night, and we will leave and get married and we can both finally be happy. we have been thinking too early on what is gonna happen, and how will will even get to the point of him getting to me, i just want to be with him. he is the first person to ever accept me for who i am, he calls me his wife, i call him my husband, and im happy to have him. i just dont know how it will go for me, i dont want to go through school anymore, people seem to just, not like me at all, and im in a "special" education class. i honestly need help and guidence on what to do, how i will achive a job and start making my own decisions for once then always get forced by my family to do stuff, and like this and that, they want me to be what they want. Nobody will understand. i want to be free and be with my BF, then i can say, i'm happy. someone, please help me.

  • #2
    re: The next few years..

    Hey there,

    Thank you for contacting us. You mentioned that you are 17 now and are thinking of leaving home in about 3-4 years. That would probably make you about 20-21 years old. At that point you would be considered a legal adult able to make your own decisions to leave as you please. There probably won't be a lot that your parents can do to prevent you from leaving, aside from voicing their opinions. You seem to want to learn how to be independent and make your own decisions. That's something you may have to start doing for yourself. Take small strides in learning what you can do and what you are in control of for your life. Then go from there. There are LGBT resources and hotlines that you can call to see if they can be of support for you and how you're feeling. We recommend the Trans Lifeline at 1-877-565-8860 to start off with.

    Best of luck to you,
    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: The next few years..

      Originally posted by ccsmod2 View Post
      Hey there,

      Thank you for contacting us. You mentioned that you are 17 now and are thinking of leaving home in about 3-4 years. That would probably make you about 20-21 years old. At that point you would be considered a legal adult able to make your own decisions to leave as you please. There probably won't be a lot that your parents can do to prevent you from leaving, aside from voicing their opinions. You seem to want to learn how to be independent and make your own decisions. That's something you may have to start doing for yourself. Take small strides in learning what you can do and what you are in control of for your life. Then go from there. There are LGBT resources and hotlines that you can call to see if they can be of support for you and how you're feeling. We recommend the Trans Lifeline at 1-877-565-8860 to start off with.

      Best of luck to you,
      NRS
      My parents are starting to get out of hand, im still trying to keep my BF hidden from them and the whole thing with me wanting to be female, they are both hidden, they still dont know, however they are planning on removing the door to my room, that is my only sence of freedom is me locked in my room, where i can be free with him, now that they may remove it in a week, just i don't know what to do now, im panicing, i want to run and be with him now, is there anything i can do?!?

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: The next few years..

        Hello,
        Thank you for posting here on our forums.
        It sounds like your parents have become more restrictive and you are at your whits-end.
        We know that you were planning on leaving in a few years but now you are feeling like you would like to leave sooner, if you were to leave sooner do you have anything setup for yourself? Like where would you go for the remaining years until he is able to return to America to get you? How do you think your parents will react to you leaving home? These are all heavy questions and we want to make sure that you have thought about everything completely. If you would like you can give us a call and we can talk about your situation and all of your options. 1-800-RUNAWAY
        Also as mentioned before it sounds we want you to know that there is tons of support out there for you and if you ever need to talk to someone more specifically about Trans issues feel free to give Trans Lifeline a call 1-877-565-8860. Their hotline is staffed by the true experts on transgender experience, transgender people themselves.
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: The next few years..

          Originally posted by ccsmod0 View Post
          Hello,
          Thank you for posting here on our forums.
          It sounds like your parents have become more restrictive and you are at your whits-end.
          We know that you were planning on leaving in a few years but now you are feeling like you would like to leave sooner, if you were to leave sooner do you have anything setup for yourself? Like where would you go for the remaining years until he is able to return to America to get you? How do you think your parents will react to you leaving home? These are all heavy questions and we want to make sure that you have thought about everything completely. If you would like you can give us a call and we can talk about your situation and all of your options. 1-800-RUNAWAY
          Also as mentioned before it sounds we want you to know that there is tons of support out there for you and if you ever need to talk to someone more specifically about Trans issues feel free to give Trans Lifeline a call 1-877-565-8860. Their hotline is staffed by the true experts on transgender experience, transgender people themselves.
          Update on the situation, im honestly starting to get depressed, He left me, and does not love me anymore, im trying to tell him my feelings and thoughts, but he just, neglects them. i pretty much lost my future husband, the one i would run away with when he gets me.
          he left cause i was going through a hard time and all me and him did for a week was get into arguments, started by me and him, i pretty much lost my future now.
          Im kinda just, lost now on what to do. Im trying to get him back, i need him..
          Am i allowed to keep updating here? i need help and i cant really call, as i do not have a phone that can call these numbers.

          Comment


          • #6
            RE: Then next few years..

            Hello again,

            Thank you for writing back. We are very sorry to hear about your breakup. It sounds like you are dealing with some very painful emotions, and like your future is not going to be the same one you hoped to share with your boyfriend. That sounds like a really tough situation. You have a bright future ahead of you, and you deserve a relationship with somebody who can stick with you through difficult times and be there for you. We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can. Please note that we limit the amount of times we can write back and forth on the forums, so we strongly encourage you to find a way to reach out by phone or contact us through our live chat if you get the chance. That way we can go into detail about your plan and come up with options to deal with your situation. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.
            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

            National Runaway Safeline
            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

            Comment

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