I'm planning on lying to my parents so I can see my male friend.

[Guest]

Hello,

I'm a fourteen year old girl and right now I am emotionally troubled. First of all, I would like to describe my male friend. We've known each other for more than a year now. He was depressed and feeling suicidal, but recently, I became very good friends with him and he confessed everything to me. Now he feels much better. His parents do not care about him at all and used to abuse him, but that was a long time ago, and still, he feels isolated and does not trust any adults. He is such a nice person though he had been through a lot. He is transgender. He feels like a girl, and all of his friends are girls. However, he's been bullied several times because he was rumored to be a 'pevert' amongst the students in my school. I was not close to him in middle school and it was only recently that
I became his best friend.

I like him. As a friend. He makes me feel so comfortable around him and somehow, I want to help him get through his life. I'm doing everything I can. However, my parents are preventing me from doing so. I told them about him and they told me not to hang around him anymore, because there is a chance that he might have bad intentions and they want me to focus on the academics, not a guy. They think there is no reason for me to listen to him and spend my time with him. But does there have to be a reason to hang out with someone? They are not allowing me to see him afterschool or anything like that.

On Halloween, I am planning to lie to my parents and eat dinner with him. I'm hanging out with my girl friends after, but I do not want him to spend Halloween alone. He has only few friends and I am his closest. His other friends say they are busy.

What at should I do? I don't want to lie to my parents but they are never going to approve him. I know he is a nice person and I want to hang out with him more, as friends, truly. I do not have any feelings for him. I'm feeling troubled. This is the biggest wrongdoing I am about to commit, lying to my parents to see a guy. Can anyone please give me advice? That would help me tremendously. I do not mind if it opposes to my personal wishes of seeing him.

Thank you for listening and I hope you have a nice day.

Best,
The Troubled

[ccsmod9]

Thank you for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know that you are probably going through a really stressful time with the situation you find yourself in. Our hope through this all is that we might provide you with resources and tips to help you in the decision making process.

From what we gather about your situation it seems like you really want to help your friend and want to go above and beyond what it looks like to be a good friend. Perhaps there is a better way of looking at the situation. Maybe you could hang out with him and your friends. That way it is not just you but he can perhaps find new friends as well. It also helps in that you didn’t lie to your parents at all you hung out with friends and nothing more. As far telling you what to do we can only provide options and let you decide on a plan of action. Another plan of attack is maybe not letting someone else know you are getting dinner with him just so someone is aware of your whereabouts.

We want to commend your bravery for reaching out since we know it can often be difficult to reach out and seek help. We hope that you feel more informed on the situation you currently find yourself in. If for any reason you have more questions or concerns please do not hesitate to call us at (1-800-786-2929) or online through our chat option at (www.1800runaway.org).

Best Wishes-NRS