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My very good friend is suffering, and I can't stay here much longer

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  • My very good friend is suffering, and I can't stay here much longer

    Recently, my best friend has fallen in a terrible pit of hopelessness. He is always drinking, and getting high, and he's been skipping school a lot too. I want to help him but he seems like he doesn't want any help, and he also makes it seem as though my caring about him is not important. I have been prioritizing him for a very long time even though he has treated me poorly and he has turned his back on my family. However, I understand that he is struggling to get his things together, and he feels so worthless that he will not accept any help. Lately I've been losing hope.

    My parents don't want me to speak to him since he is a bad influence, and he treated me awfully a while back. I tried to make them understand that he is hurting and he needs support, but my parents say I cannot give him support because I myself am unstable. I also found out recently that my friend is involved with a girl who is not particularly helpful to him, and I am deeply saddened by this. They say the best thing to happen to him is something drastic, like being sent to rehab. However, I fear the worst will happen before this and I am very anxious.

    This has taken a huge emotional toll on me. I want to help him, but I can't even help myself. He seems to not want me in his life anyway, but I feel that somewhere inside of him he still cares about me and wants to get better. I don't want to stay here anymore. I want to leave for a few days, and I've been getting things ready to leave. I feel that it will give me some time to cool off, and will also be that "drastic" thing that will snap him out of his spiraling out of control. I certainly have issues that contribute to leaving being my last resort (I am constantly being bullied at school, I am not doing well in my classes, I am extremely saddened and exhausted from all that has been going on). I honestly feel that my only other option is too drastic and irreversible. I am preparing everything and figuring out where to go. I cannot forsee if that will be an eye opener or just make everything worse.

  • #2
    re: My very good friend is suffering, and I can't stay here much longer

    Thank you for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. From what you shared with us, it seems that you are going through a lot with your best friend. It seems that you have been very supportive and caring towards your best friend, but that your efforts to help your best friend have gone unappreciated. This is very unfair to you and in no way is this your fault. You and your efforts to help deserve to be acknowledged and not taken for granted.

    Caring and prioritizing your own needs and emotions is very important. It seems that you are doing your best to cope with everything that you are experiencing, but that problems with your best friend have escalated, causing you anxiety and overall emotional distress. Emotional distress can sometimes be overwhelming and you don’t have to experience this alone. If you would like additional support, one helpful resource is the National Suicide Hotline, 1800-273-8255. They have skilled and trained counselors available with a lot of experience talking with people who are feeling and experiencing emotional distress and can help you process and talk about what you are going through.

    We want you to know that you do have options. We are here to listen, here to help. If you would like to talk further about your situation and explore more safe options for you or your best friend, please do not hesitate to call or chat with us. We have a database for resources for counseling services and other support services that we would be happy to share. You can reach us at our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). Our live chat service is available from 4:30 PM to 11:30 PM CST and could be accessed through our website, http://www.1800runaway.org/. We wish you the best of luck and hope to hear from you soon.

    Stay strong,
    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

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