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  • What should I do?

    Hello, so I've tried talking to a few friends and a lot of other people for advice but nothing seems to be working or convincing me enough to decide on something. I know the decision lies on me, but I still need some help in trying to find out what can I do .I have a long distance relationship, with a girl that I met online maybe about a year ago, but we have been dating for 9 months .(I am also a girl.) I completely trust her and her parents, she hasn't given me a reason to not trust her and is about as safe and understanding as I am . However, there is an age difference..she is 16 while I am 20, but we had started to date even before we knew each others ages so it sort of surprised me when i found out her age . She is also mature for her age and her mother has already approved of me as her girlfriend, therefore I don't see a problem . Here's the thing, her mother would like me to come visit for a few days, and she lives in a different state of course, her mother offered to help pay for my ticket and is also excited to meet me as my girlfriend is. The only problem here is that my parents are being difficult with me. They have already told me that I could go if I wish, but that it isn't right because 1) she js younger than me and I can get caught up in legal issues and 2) if i wanted to visit i would have paid for my own ticket. However the reason her mom wants to help me is because she knows I'm a college student, plus knows how costly plane tickets would be. I know i can get caught in legal issues if anything were to happen but i HIGHLY doubt anything will happen. I also trust myself and she trusts me just as much. I would like to know what is any one else's opinion on what I can do, I really do love her and I feel like it would be the right time to visit to see if this is a good relationshipahip or not, and to see how it advances . But I also wouldn't want my parents to think of me as being "immature" for making my own decision based on want.

  • #2
    Hello, thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. We are here to listen and will try to help in any way we can. We understand your concern with going to go pursue this relationship. It can be scary to meet someone for the first time especially with people telling you it may not be a good idea.

    While we cannot give you our direct opinion on the matter we can present some options to consider before you do go. It may be beneficial to do some research on the laws of consent where you are going. This may help ease some of your concerns for being older than the person you are dating. One helpful resource may be going onto a website called https://sexetc.org/action-center/sex-in-the-states/ .This may be able to give you some information about consent laws and other thing pertaining to your situation. Other things that may help you out before you go are to do a video chat with your girlfriend and her mother and to ask questions about where you will be staying, and what you can expect when you get there just to confirm that you feel safe and comfortable going there. This may help with making sure that you are going to a trustworthy person.

    Again, thank you for contacting the NRS. You can contact us for further information and assistance by calling 1800-RUNAWAY or by chatting with us at 1800ruanaway.org. We hope for the best for you.

    -NRS

    We hope this response was helpful! We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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