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Running away with my fiancé? Please help...

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  • Running away with my fiancé? Please help...

    My Fiancé and I have been together for 3 1/2 months now and we have been planning on having a child but his parents found out from going through my journal and we may not be able to see each other anymore. He told me to tell my parents it was a book I was working on because they want to tell my parents about what they found out. If plan A doesn't work out we came up with running away. I'm not pregnant which is good if we run away. Also, no one knows about the engagement because we are only 15 turning 16. We just don't know where to go and what we will do about high school. If it helps we live in California.

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    Re: Running away with my fiancé? Please help...

    Thank you for writing us at the National Runaway Safeline. We’re here to listen and here to help! Congratulations on your engagement to your fiancé. It must be tough to face the idea of not being allowed to be with him since your parents found your journal stating your goal to have a baby.

    If you all ran away, you would be committing a status offense. A status offense is something that is illegal based on your age. When their youth run away, parents and guardians have the right to file a runaway report. Runaway reports contain information about the youth who ran away that goes into a nationwide database. This means that youth who run to any state in the United States could be found and returned back home. For those people who help runaways, they could be charged (and subjected to fines or worse) with harboring a runaway.

    As for attending school, under the McKinney Vento Act, runaway and homeless youth should not be denied the opportunity to attend. You can contact your state coordinator to learn more about this. See the links below for more information. You can find your state coordinator by clicking the second link.

    You mentioned that you never told your parents about you being engaged. Did you know that in California, youth who seek to marry under the age of 18 need to have at least one parent’s approval for each of you when you apply for a marriage license? For more information about teen marriage laws in California, see the links below:

    Earlier you mentioned that you and your fiancé are planning to have a child. What makes you both want one so soon? Babies are wonderful and they also come with a lot of responsibility. Have you both considered the possible downsides to having a baby so young?

    Feel free to contact the hotlines below to talk more about planning for pregnancy and to find resources out there for teen parents:

    The Option Line: 1-800-712-HELP (1-800-712-4357) website:

    American Pregnancy Helpline: 1-866-942-6466 website:

    Planned Parenthood 1-800-230-PLAN (1-800-230-7526) - for routing to local resources website:

    Ultimately, your decisions are yours. If you would like to run away, know that there are consequences. We would love to provide you with any support that we could to help you as you decide what to do. We can talk via chat or by phone.


    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!


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