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Relationship/Running Away

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  • Relationship/Running Away

    In my current situation, I am in a long distance relationship. Let's just say we live two states over from each other. Our relationship has been lasting for over 5 months, we've known each other for about a year now. We've dated once before in this whole entire year. The breakup is non-crucial to the situation. Anyways, she is 2 years younger than I am. We are both currently under the age of 18. This may come out as a situation where it's running away for a loved one but, it's much more than that. Her parents have split up, there are no whereabouts for her father and her mother has little to no care about her anymore, although there are legal reasons as to why her mother somewhat cares about her daughter. She stays with other family and for most of the days would stay in her room. Her family has started to care less and less and it's to the point where she feels as if she's not needed. She has felt as if staying where she is will bare down her emotions even more. Her situation is, she feels as if I'm the only one in her whole entire life that can be trusted anymore. She wants to run away from her situation so that she will not have feel anymore pain. She is currently scared to, due to the reason she has no body to be with through this. She also lives in a state where running away underage is illegal so it makes it a harder situation. I also do believe that someone she lives with will file a runaway/missing person report causing greater damage to her priority.

    Now to my situation, she feels as if she were to run away to where I live would risk the danger of getting us both in trouble. As I have forgot to mention, this has been planned thoroughly on how I'm going to run away. The reason I want to run away is due to my depression and loss in goal for life. I have currently lost a majority amount of friends and my family has came to the point where I can be deemed as "crazy." My other reason is to make sure to get my girlfriend out of the situation she is currently in, I have been planning to come and see her but I have currently no way of knowing how I am going to get there. I've recently thought about taking a plane to where she is at but with the budget that I have it is a tad bit expensive. I then reconsidered taking a greyhound bus to city that is fairly close to her. The only problem is that I'm afraid I will be deemed as young and would need identification to get on the bus. I've also thought about the time frame, bus would take a day while plane would take the same day, this would give me more time to make our run. The only major problem I have is with identification, if I am not able to show identification with my picture, which I do but it is not a state issued license. I'm also worried the greyhound bus will not let me on due to my age. After, I was planning on finding some sort of shelter but I have no idea where I would stay and how far I would have to go. Thank you for reading, please reply back soon.

  • #2
    Often, youth may reach out to NRS in several different ways to discuss their situation. If a response from NRS is not visible to a bulletin posting it may be that we have already provided services to that individual through another platform we provide such as email, our crisis hotline, or our live chat service (in operation every day from 4:30p to 11:30p CST). NRS encourages anyone in need of assistance to contact us through our 24 hour crisis hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY to receive immediate support.
    Thank you, NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!


    • #3
      Hello, I am a 17 yr old female living in Southern California who has been wanting to leave my house for a while now. Last night I had packed my stuff and was prepared to leave when my aunt (my legal guardian) told me I would not be leaving and that if I were to leave they would call the police and force me back home. My boyfriend and his family are willing to take me in and my aunt was willing to give permission to stay with them but if my aunt does will we have to go through the court? Or can we just make up a contract stating that my aunt has given permission to stay with my bf? Please help. I want to leave soon.


      • ccsmod6
        ccsmod6 commented
        Editing a comment

        Thanks so much for taking the time to reach out to us today. From what you've said it seems like you're ready to leave your Aunt's house but she does not want you to, which sounds like it must be difficult to go through. We are glad that your boyfriend and his family are so supportive of you and willing to take you in. Leaving home if your aunt does not want you to can be tricky, but we can talk about some options that you do have.

        The first option would be to get your aunt's approval. This can be hard, but maybe if you try sitting your aunt down with your boyfriend and his parents and have an open conversation about things it can work. You can make up a contract stating that your aunt gave you permission, yes, and that's a good idea! But your aunt would need to sign that contract herself in order to make it valid.

        You could potentially go to court, but that could be a long and expensive process. We are not legal experts though, so it may be best to turn to a local lawyer in your area and ask them more specific questions about your situation.

        One other thing you can do is call out to your local police department to see if they take runaway reports for 17 year olds. Most of the time you cannot leave home under the age of 18 as your guardian would have the legal right to file a runaway report for you. Running away is not illegal, but it is considered a status offense so the police would have to bring you back home if they found you. Some police departments may not take a runaway report for a 17 year old though, as they are so close to being 18. This tends to differ from police department to police department so it would be best to reach out to your local department to see what exactly they would do in that situation.

        If you want to talk more about what you're going through please don't hesitate to reach out to us again! You can call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY, we are 24/7 and someone will always be here to answer and see what else we can do to help you.
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