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15, pregnant, denied seeing the father

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  • 15, pregnant, denied seeing the father

    She's 15 and she is pregnant with my child. He parents were obviously furious. She has a mom and a step-dad. Her mother told her, "I would kill you right now and I wouldn't care if I went t jail." He step father talked down to her saying she couldn't do anything and she was worthless. Her step dad hadn't had a job in around 12 months and her mom hasn't had one in a few months. They had been living of money handed to them by relatives. In February 2014 they got money from their income tax return and moved from Ohio to Kentucky and made her go with them rather than live with me and my family. They still don't have jobs. She doesn't want to be there anymore. They abuse her mentally (although we couldn't prove it). They talk bad about me and her all the time. Recently her step dad told her to hug his aunt. A women she had never known. She said she didn't want to. Her step dad grabbed her by the arm and said, "If you were a boy I would knock you on your ass for disrespecting my family." She is not allowed to see me. And her step father claims I will never see her or the baby and he will make sure of it.

    We want to be together. We want this baby. Her parents are making decisions for her that will affect her life well after she is 18. They are preventing her from making decisions that affect her life and our baby's life. She wants to live with my dad and me.

    She doesn't deserve to live this way. No one does. Parental power should only go so far. She is due in early October. What are our options? What if I drove to her house and she got in the car and left willingly?

    We are afraid the stress of that household will cause her to have a miscarriage. She needs out and she needs out now. Please help.

  • #2
    Re: 15, pregnant, denied seeing the father

    Hello,

    Thanks for posting. It sounds like you and your girlfriend going through a tough time. It's very supportive of you to contact us to advocate for you and your girlfriend.

    You mentioned mental abuse of your girlfriend by her parents; have you and your girlfriend explored options to report the abuse? Abuse laws vary from state to state and we do not have a legal background, but this may be an option to explore.

    What housing options has your girlfriend explored? There may be options for her to explore. We could provide this information for you if you'd like. Let us know her location, including city and state.

    We encourage you or your girlfriend to call us. It would help if we could discuss your situation further so that we may provide you with more targeted resources. We also offer a conference call option between your girlfriend and her legal guardians, which would allow her and her family to discuss her concerns that you've expressed here. She can call us to initiate this process, or to talk in general.

    We're 24/7, and anonymous and confidential. Thanks again for posting your message and for being brave enough to reach out. We're at 1800-RUNAWAY (786-292).
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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    • #3
      There really isn't enough evidence we could prove to actually support the mental abuse other than our word against the parents and I'm not sure if it is a viable option to explore.

      She lives in Russel Springs, Kentucky. We haven't explored any housing options as her parents want her to do what they want and that often doesn't serve the best interests for her. I often explain it as her being their pet. They feed her and give her a home but they don't do much else.

      I told her about 1-800-RUNAWAY today before I made this post. I encouraged her to just call to talk, but she can't do that while her parents are around.

      Thank you for responding. I'm concerned for her and the baby, but I don't know any options.

      Comment


      • #4
        Hello,

        Thanks for responding with this additional information.

        It’s unfortunate that emotional abuse is harder to report because of the lack of physical evidence. Does she go to school? She might be able to talk to teachers or counselors there who would offer her support and listen to her.

        In our database, there aren’t any shelters that come up in Russel Springs, KY. There is a youth shelter in Paducah, KY called Hope Unlimited Pregnancy Care Center (800-785-4442) that takes in pregnant youth. They are far from Russel Springs, but they might be able to offer some resources or direct you to a shelter that might not be in our database but that is closer to where you live.

        Again, it’s great that she has you in her life for support, and it’s great that you want to raise the baby with her. Planned Parenthood (national hotline number at 1-800-230-7526) would also be able to offer resources to teenage parents.

        We are here 24/7, for both you and her, if you need to talk to someone about this situation. Good luck with everything,
        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #5
          After further exploring I have learned that it is possible to get married in the state of Kentucky without consent of the parents if the minor is pregnant. What qualifications would one need to get the court's approval?

          Comment


          • #6
            Re:15,pregnant, denied seeing the father

            Thanks for reaching out to us and it sounds like you've done a bit of research regarding your question so that's really great. Unfortunately, we are not legal experts so we can't give you a specific answer to what you're asking but we can point you in the direction to someone who may be able to help you out. You mentioned you were in Kentucky so we can give you the general number for legal aid in your state. The number is 1-866-452-9243. If you aren't familiar with what legal aid is, it's basically a number that will direct you to a hotline or call center that can better answer your question with more specifics then we can. We hope this helps and if you need anything else you can always call us at 1800-RUNAWAY or chat us from the hours of 4:30-11:30 central standard time.


            Best of Luck,
            -NRS
            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

            National Runaway Safeline
            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

            Comment


            • #7
              Thank you very much! You guys have been a great help with our situation with support and options. It's very helpful knowing people are here to help.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re:15,pregnant, denied seeing the father

                We're glad we could help and we hope it works out. Feel free to call 24/7 1-800-RUNAWAY or Live Chat (big red button at http://www.1800runaway.org) from 4:30 to 11:30pm CST for further help.

                -NRS
                Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                National Runaway Safeline
                [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                Tell us what you think about your experience!
                https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                Comment

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