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Feeling unwanted/confused

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  • Feeling unwanted/confused

    Recently I stopped talking to the only guy I feel I will ever love. I know that sounds stupid, but it is truely how I feel. We have known each other for almost 5 years now and we have a pretty deep past. We have never officially been in a relationship, but sometimes it has felt like we were in one. It really bothers me that he will not give me a chance when he knows what I'm capable of. All my friends and family tell me I'm better without him and that he is crazy and all that stuff, but he honestly makes me happy. When it is just me & him everything feels right. When he met almost all of my family they loved him at first, but when he started going through a phase of ignoring me my family didn't like how he hurt my feelings. I have done so much for him and wasted a lot of time and money, yet he still doesn't get it. At one point I let him live with me for a week and I could have gotten in serious trouble for that, but he left before anyone knew. I get tired of him always choosing girls that don't care the way I do and some of these girls are super young or live far away... He has told me before he knows how I feel and how i care for him. I feel like he just uses me sometimes. I know I shouldn't love him, but I do and I don't know how to help that. When he's good he's great and when he's bad he really knows how to hurt me. I get tired of all of his head games because he does make me feel like he wants me too sometimes. Especially when we would have sex. Basically I just don't understand why he doesn't want me when I've never done anything wrong to him and he has screwed me over so much... When I told him how I felt he said he ignores me because he doesn't want me to have those feelings and tries to push me away but he also said I'm his best friend so it's hard....I hate that he pretty much ignores how I feel or makes it seem like it's not a big deal. Also I forgot to mention I think he is bipolar.. He takes medicine for it but doesn't always take it... It is really weird though because he literally will go through phases where he is nice during certain months and mean during others. It's been the same every year since I've met him... I know I could probably find better but even through all his problems and bad times I still see the good in him. I just don't know how to deal with all these emotions and his confusing messages.... I want something real and I want it with him because I love him but I need to figure this whole thing out.

  • #2
    re: Feeling unwanted/confused

    Hi there and thanks for reaching out to us. It sounds like you are going through some really intense emotions and times right now and we are glad that you felt comfortable sharing that with us. Relationships can be really tough to navigate and it sounds like you really love your boyfriend and care so much about him. It can be difficult to be in a relationship and feel like your partner isn’t respecting your feelings, but how you feel matters.

    Sexetc.org and scarleteen.com are both really great websites that have forums, articles and information on safe and healthy dating relationships. The site can have some useful information on safety and communication within your relationship as well as ways to take care of yourself emotionally and physically. We are also here for you 24 hours a day at 1-800-RUNAWAY or from 4:30-11:30pm CST. We are completely confidential and anonymous and are definitely here for you.

    Take care,
    -NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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