Need relationship advice

[Unregistered]

Hello,

I am 14 and going into highschool and have met this girl from the other middle school in my town through our school's cross country program. (It's still summer break) I like her and I am 80% sure she likes me, but she is a very friendly person so it is a little hard to be 100% sure.
Her brother is a captain on my team and he needed my phone number to text me about where we would meet for runs etc and about a week after he got my phone number, his sister, (the girl I like) texted me. I was a little surprised but now we've been texting usually twice a day for the last 5 or so days. I've gotten to know her a lot through text but we are both scared to approach each other during cross country practice!

So 2 things:

1) Is there any way to tell if she likes me for sure?
2) I need advice on how to talk to her in person. I do great in texting and make her laugh a lot and make her feel special but it feels like I still need to break the ice in person. How?!?!

In a few days, our team is going on a 5 hour drive to Cincinnati and we decided to sit together on the way there. I need advice for what to do/say!

She is also the first girl I've had a REAL crush on that likely has a crush on me.

Please respond soon, thanks!

[ccsmod2]

Thank you for reaching out to us and telling us about what’s going on. It sounds like you have feelings for a girl on your cross country team but you are unsure about how to approach her in person. It’s great that you have started to build a relationship with her through text messaging, it sounds like that’s a great way for you to get to know her.

You asked if there was a way for you to know for certain if she likes you and unfortunately, we don’t know of any way but it sounds like the two of you have a great connection so far. You said that you will be traveling to Cincinnati in a few days and you will be sitting together; that may be a great opportunity to talk with each other. What do you think would happen if you talked to her like you do in the text messages?

Here at the National Runaway Safeline, we are a completely confidential and anonymous hotline for youth in crisis. If you would like to call and talk with us some more, you can reach us 24 hours a day, 7 days a week at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) and we can talk with you about what is going on.

We look forward to hearing from you and wish you the best of luck.

~NRS

[Unregistered]

Thank you for responding so quickly!!!!
In answer to your question:

I don't have a lot of experience with talking to girls for more than 10 minutes at a time (in person)
The bus trip will be nearly 5 hours!!! I'm super nervous and have had some self-confidence issues in the past. I have been very honest with her about that and she understands, she even admitted that she is a bit nervous as well. I need tips on what to talk to her about and how to stay out of the dreaded friend zone!
We have really connected through running and music, and she has many ambitions that my sister is currently fulfilling in college.

I am just much less confident in person and need tips on how to use this bus ride to my advantage... I really just need someone to talk to before this. My parents aren't much help. My friends would just laugh at me even though they probably have the same sort of problems.

Also, if was to really mess up on the trip, any advice? We will be in Cincinnati for a few days and will be going to an amusement park and a baseball game, but I'm sure that she will want to be with her friends.

I understand that this topic is much less severe than many of the others on this message board, and I want to make sure that you know how much it matters to me that you have responded so quickly. I need to let all this out i guess haha. Im not very good at letting my feelings show through with most people.

[ccsmod0]

RE: Need relationship advice

Hi there,

Good to hear from you again. It sounds like you’re really trying to figure this out, but also pretty excited about the opportunity to share a bus ride with her. You seem like a really thoughtful person! So we can’t give you advice, but there may be some options available to you.

Since you have a 5 hour trip, sometimes having other things to do besides talking can be helpful. What if you brought a deck of cards? You might want to try thinking about other ways to pass the time.

One thing that we might be able to help you out with is a role play. If you call in, we may be able to talk through how that conversation might go, and ways to stay confident. You can contact us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) at anytime. We are completely confidential and anonymous.

We look forward to your call,

NRS

[Unregistered]

Thanks! One problem though...

She said she can't go anymore because she promised my friend that they would sit together on the way there at the beginning of summer. I asked if she wanted to sit with me on the way back and she said one of her friends was sitting with her then!

Is she just not ready for a relationship? She told me that she is very stressed, with school, running, and the trip. But I have a feeling that I'm the one stressing her the most. I think I'm the first guy she's liked. She's usually very outgoing and talks to everyone but gets shy around me. She doesn't avoid me... She just won't keep a conversation with me going if its just us.

So is she just not ready? I really like her. Should I just be patient and stay friends with her until a bit farther into the school year?

[ccsmod0]

RE: Need relationship advice

Thank you for reaching out again. At this time we have talked through options and listened to your story. We’d like to further explore this situation. For further support, we strongly encourage you to contact us directly at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), and look forward to your call. Lastly, please note that we offer a live chat via our website at www.1800runaway.org every day from 4:30p to 11:30p CST.

-NRS