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  • 13 and pregnant?

    i am 13 and my bf is 15.when he talks to me he sounds so sincere that i belive every word he says.
    oh baby i love you,
    youcan tell me anything,
    condoms are lame,
    its your choice,
    it took me to weeks to long to know that i shoud listen to every thing he tells me.
    is was just so he could get lucky.
    so on our first time (my first time,his like 20th) we did not use a condom.now i think i may be pregnant.
    i have only told my best freinds.they shared the usaul responses
    how was it,shame on you, you know better, if you are prego im the god mom yada yada yada...ect. lol
    but if i am, i do not know wat to do. i have considerd my options and nun are great.
    1. tell my parents and boyfriend and have the baby and give it a way
    2.run away, have the baby and keep it
    3.run away, have the baby and give it away
    4.kill my self
    i will NOT consider abortion! not because i think it wrong (i think its up to the mother of the baby)
    i just would not be able to live wit not holding it in my arms.
    wat should i do?

  • #2
    re: 13 and pregnant?

    Hey,

    Thanks for messaging us and sharing your story. It’s good to hear that your friends are there for you and it sounds like you are looking for a little more exploration/guidance on what to do from here. And as you experienced with that young man’s deceiving words, the only person that can make this decision is you. And so far, you seem to have a few options for yourself.

    First, you said you 'think' you may be pregnant. If you are able and willing, getting a pregnancy test might be a good idea. Can you afford to buy a couple tests from the store so you can do it at home and find out for sure? Because if you're not, then this may not be a problem anymore. Not to scare you but it might also be good idea to get an STD test because if this boy has done this a lot before, it's good to be careful with that. STDs aren't always visible on the body so if he hasn't had a test before, he should get one, too. Here are some quick resources if you don't have any money:

    Planned Parenthood: put you in touch with a local clinic for free/cheap pregnancy tests if you don't buy them at a local store.
    1-800-230-7526

    STD Hotline: see if there are any ways/places to get an STD test near you.
    1-800-232-4636

    Second, what’s your relationship like with your parents? What would they say if they knew that you weren’t sure you were ready to have sex with this guy in the first place and that ‘everything he told you’ was to just ‘get lucky’?

    But really, would option 1 be bad? How bad? If you ran away from home you’d have to take care of yourself AND your pregnancy and at age 13, this might be a bit difficult. What do you think your parent’s response would be and could you eventually survive that? Do you think they would force an abortion upon you? Because if that’s not something they believe in then that is already something that would be in line with your beliefs.

    And it doesn’t really sound like you want to do option 4 because you are briefly mentioning it and as you can see, it’s down at option 4 for a reason. How serious are you about this and have you ever attempted that before? If you need more help with that, please let us know.

    Again, this choice is to be made by you and it sounds like you might have to weigh the pros and cons of all those options: if you followed through with option 1 you would not have to run away but just put up with emotions from your parents. If you followed through with option 2 or 3 you would have to learn how to survive HEALTHILY because you’re planning on taking care of your baby…etc.

    But we’re here. You have people that you can trust and you can call on and if you need to sort all this stuff out with someone you can call us here. We’re anonymous, confidential and available 24 hours a day. Call us if you’d like at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929)

    Best of luck. You’re awesome.
    Last edited by ccsmod5; 06-08-2011, 09:29 AM.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      im serius about option 4

      option four should of been at the top of my list list. i briefly mentioned it because is simple and easy.
      i have atempted it 4 times and those time i was not as serius about it. i think of that option daliy. it is odd it is the one that seems more comforting and realistic. i am oddly not scared.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: 13 and Pregnant

        Hello,

        Thank you for reaching out to clarify some of your previous statements. We are pleased that you continue to consider our services as options as you try to make sense of everything going on right now. We are always here for you. Although we are not experts on the issue of suicide we certainly provide options to other sources that may be able to help you more because this is their area of expertise. In the mean time, we hope that you can give us a call directly to get some emotional support. However, the National Suicide Hotline at 1800-273-TALK (8255) is available 24 hours a day to help you. We are not in a position to tell you what to do. We cannot offer advice but we want to be there for you if you are seeking a listening ear.

        We appreciate you opening up to us. We imagine this situation is not an easy one for you. We do not want to leave you without options because your safety is our number one priority. We hope you can think over the option of calling us if you wish to further discuss alternatives. We hope you remain safe and good luck.

        -NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #5
          I'm 13 and may be pregnant

          I'm 13 in a half & my Bf is 18, & I love him dearly & we've been dating for 3 to 4 months but we knew each other for 8 to 9 months. He tells me all the time that I can trust him & whenever I'm ready just let him, so I told him I was ready. So we did it but (without the condom) . It was his first time without the condom & also mine. We have sex all the time with & without the condom but Now I think I'm pregnant but I'm not sure if I am. I havent told him that I think I am because I'm kind of scared to tell him & my parents. I really don't know what to do, I want to get a pregnancy test but I don't have enough money yet. I told my friends & they tell me if I am they were going to be there for me , I hope that's true because I don't want to do this by myself if I am pregnant. I cry all the time because I keep thinking i am. What should I do?

          Comment


          • #6
            re: 13 and pregnant

            Hi there,
            Thanks for coming to the National Runaway Switchboard and sharing what's been going on. It sounds like you're struggling a lot with what you want your next steps to be. Unfortunately we can't tell you what you should do. Only you know your situation. We're here to help you figure it out though.
            You said that you are unsure if you are pregnant, so it's still possible that you may not be. It might help to take things day by day so you don't get too stressed about something that may not be happening.
            If you would like to take a pregnancy test you may be able to get some help with that through Planned Parenthood. They are a sexual and reproductive healthcare provider. You can reach them at 1-800-230-7526, or at www.PlannedParenthood.org.
            Of course it's up to you what your next move is. You said that you feel like you can really trust your boyfriend and love him a lot, what is making you scared to tell him? Do you think that his reaction one way or another may help you in making any future decisions? Sometimes teachers or school counselors can help a great deal in situations like this. If you are comfortable reaching out to someone like that or another family member, you may be able to get some extra support through this.
            You're going through an emotional time, we definitely want to help in whatever way we can. Please give us a call anytime at 1-800-RUNAWAY where we're anonymous and confidential or feel free to chat with us from 4:30-11:30pm CST every day. We're here to help!
            Good luck with everything and we hope to hear from you soon.
            NRS
            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

            National Runaway Safeline
            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

            Comment


            • #7
              13 and has proplems

              Well at the moment I've had a lot of trouble I've been speaking to a 23 year old online and I meet him through an xbox , well we got really close and got in a relationship and well we webcamed and that and after a month he flashed and I sort of did and I wish I never and my mum found out and she keeps moaning and shouting and keeps saying she will go to the police but she don't understand I can't really tell my mum stuff as she is not understanding , thankyou plz reply

              Comment


              • #8
                RE: 13 and has proplems

                Hi there,

                Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. Wow, it seems like you’re going through a tough situation right now. It can be hard when we feel like we made a mistake (we’ve all been there!) and it sounds like your mom just isn’t understanding what’s going on. You're really brave to reach out for some support!

                One thing that you might want to think about is talking to your mom. We understand that that can definitely be a hard to do. If you’re considering that, there might be some things you want to think about to have a good and productive conversation:

                1. Are you and your mom both calm when you start talking?
                2. Are you and your mom in a location where you both feel comfortable?
                3. Is there someone in your life that you both trust that might be able to facilitate a conversation?

                These are just some things you might want to consider if you do decide to have a conversation with her. Another option that you have is to call us. We are available 24/7 and are confidential and anonymous. You can even ask to do a conference call with your mom and we could help you talk through some things that are on your mind. You can contact us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). If calling isn’t your thing, you can chat with us through our website (www.1800runaway.org) from 4.30pm-11.30pm Central Standard Time.

                We look forward to hearing from you! Best of luck,

                NRS
                Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                National Runaway Safeline
                [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                Tell us what you think about your experience!
                https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                Comment


                • #9
                  Am I pregnant at 13?

                  Hi I'm scared I'm pregnant but I can't be sure! I have never had sex or anything like that I think it's wrong to have sex at the age of 13, I have been getting signs of pregnancy such as white mucas, belly getting bigger, boobs starting to hurt and no period this has been happening since January! I haven't told my friends or family because I am to scared they will get really cross and hurt me but if I was my perants I would probably be very angry but the thing is I no I haven't had sex but still having signs! I haven't seen the doctors or anything like that because I'm to scared what should I do?

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Thank you for reaching out to us and looking for assistance. It sounds like you are having a difficult time right now and we’re glad that you contacted us. Hopefully, we will be able to find you some resources to help you out.

                    It sounds like you are concerned about being pregnant and it seems like that is very scary for you. Now, we aren’t medically trained here but from our knowledge, you would have to be having sex in order to get pregnant. It seems like you are experiencing some symptoms that concern you though; have you talked with a doctor or school nurse about these things? They may be able to help you out in figuring out what is going on and suggest some things you may be able to do. If you aren’t comfortable talking to any of those people, you may be able to call Planned Parenthood at 1-800-230-7526 and talk with someone there.

                    If you would like to explore other options or see what resources may be available to you, please call us at anytime; our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) and we are completely confidential and anonymous. We also have online chat services that are available from 4:30 PM-11:30 PM (CST), 7 days a week.

                    We look forward to hearing from you and wish you the best of luck.

                    ~NRS
                    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                    National Runaway Safeline
                    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                    Tell us what you think about your experience!
                    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      13 and prego

                      I am 13 and 6 months pregnant. My mom was not happy, but shes ok now. I do get called a slut at school but whateves. Its a girl so ya

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: 13 and pregnant?

                        Hello there,

                        It sounds like you wanted to share your situation on this forum which is perfectly fine. We are sorry to hear you are called names at school, we imagine that does not make things any easier. No one deserves to be bullied and you might find some helpful tips to deal with bullying here: http://www.stopbullying.gov/. It sounds like your mom has turned her perspective around on your pregnancy and is more supportive now which is good.

                        We are available if you need additional support or resources. In the meantime, you can always check out: http://sexetc.org/sex-ed/info-center...ries-pregnancy to find more pregnancy and parenting support. You can try our Live Chat which is open every day from 4:30 to 11:30 pm CST. (Big red button at www.1800runaway.org) We also have our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) if you are unable to chat. Best of luck to you and your baby.

                        -NRS
                        Last edited by ccsmod3; 06-17-2013, 05:11 PM.
                        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                        National Runaway Safeline
                        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                        Tell us what you think about your experience!
                        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          13 and think I might be pregnant

                          I'm 13 way to young to be having sex or having a baby. I should've thought twice about Doug it an with no condom. But, I threw up cake I have alil nose bleed I'm always getting stomach aches an head aches. My period is extremely late. My mom and fb know we think I am but also don't and I need answer on how I can actually fin out if I am or what to do if I am. Because me and my 15 yr old bf decided if I am Oregon then we are keeping we were stupid enough to lay down an do it we gotta pay the price. Abortion isn't an option I would have the baby. I feel like I lasted down an done it so umma lay down an have it. Like my mom told me grown up things falls behind grown responsibilities!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            re: 13 and think I might be pregnant

                            Hi there,

                            Thanks for reaching out tonight and sharing your story with us. It sounds like you’re going through a lot right now and that you’re thinking you might be pregnant. It’s great that you have support around you with your boyfriend and your mom. It’s smart of you to reach out and get some guidance. You asked a good question and it looks like you’re trying to put together a plan. That’s smart. So let’s see how we can support you tonight.

                            You mentioned trying to find out a way to determine if you are pregnant. When people think they might be pregnant, it’s a good idea to make sure. One way to do that is to buy a pregnancy test. Usually those would be sold at a convenience store or a pharmacy (sometimes even grocery stores). If you don’t feel comfortable going yourself, you might be able to ask a friend to get one or maybe your mom.

                            If you are pregnant, a good resource for you might be Planned Parenthood. They can provide you with health care options and ways to make sure that you and your baby are safe. Even if you aren’t pregnant, they can talk through with you ways to be safe if you have sex. Their number is 1-800-230-7526. They can also talk through with you what rights you have if you decide to have the baby.

                            Another resource that can be helpful (whether you’re pregnant or not) is www.sexetc.org. They have a bunch of information on their website and can be a place to hear what other people have gone through.

                            We are also here to support you through this time. If you’d like to talk more, or have any other questions or want to talk through more options, please call us 24 hours a day at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We are anonymous and confidential. If calling isn’t your thing, you can chat with us through our website (www.1800runaway.org) from 4.30pm-11.30pm Central Time.

                            We look forward to your call or chat.

                            Best of luck to you,

                            NRS
                            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                            National Runaway Safeline
                            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                            Tell us what you think about your experience!
                            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              I think I'm pregnant but I'm 13 help me

                              I'm 13 and I only had sex with my boyfriend and I have missed my period which I never had happen before it is always on time help I'm really scared

                              Comment

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