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is there something i can do to stop charges being pressed for harboring a runaway

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  • is there something i can do to stop charges being pressed for harboring a runaway

    My boyfriends parents want me to move in with them but my father doesn't agree. His parents want me to move in because i dont have support or guidence at home. Ive been Taking care of myself since about age 10 and currently live with my grandparents. i dont even live with my dad he just has legal guardianship. He doesnt want me to move in with them because im "not 18 and cant do what i want". My dad doesnt do anything for me except occasionally buys me things. I have a job, i pay for my own things when i have the money. If i dont have money i dont ask for help i just try to get by on my own because no one helps if i ask. His parents want me to move in because they say they see a lot of potential in me and dont see me getting as far as i can living at my grand parents where there is barely any structure or guidance. Partially because of the language barrier. They want to help put me through college and take me to the doctor which are things my dad cant and wont do. i have lupus and IBS but i have never been able to get any medical help for them because my dad "doesnt have the money". My boyfriends parents offered to take me to the doctor and get me the medical attention i so desperately need at this point.Of course his parents have stipulations for me living there: I have to stay in school(i never planned on leaving), I have to have a job(which i already do), I have to make contributions around the house(i do that already more than i do at home), and i have to be on birth control (they said they would take me themselves to get that done). My father and i have never really had any type of relationship. After him and his second wife got divorced my father went into depression and became an alcoholic. I used to be the one to take care of him when he was drunk. i made sure he made it to bed every night and didnt choke on his own spit or throw up, i would make dinner and clean the house. i Did all this while being the youngest of the 3 kids that lived with him. He is now on his third marriage and they have 2 kids together. I get along with his wife better than i get along with him because we are closer in age.(shes 22, im 17). My dad tells me if i move in with my boyfriend and his parents he will press charges. I dont wanna put his parents in that situation because they are good people just trying to help. I would just like to know if there is anything i can do to keep my father from pressing charges even if i dont have his permission to move out. Like if i were to move without permission, is there anything i can do to fight the charges if they are filed.

  • #2
    Re: is there something i can do to stop charges being pressed for harboring a runaway

    Thank you for contacting us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you have a lot to deal with in your life right now, and you seem very responsible. It is nice to know however that your boyfriend’s family is so supportive of you, and that they want to see you get proper healthcare and pursue your education. It sounds like you want to protect them from any legal action your dad might take if your move out. We are not legal experts here at NRS, and it’s not clear which state you’re living in but, for most states, 18 is considered the age of majority (that is, the age at which you can legally move out without your parent’s permission). You can check the laws in your particular state on the website You said you live with your grandparents, and it might be helpful to discuss your thoughts with them, if you’re comfortable doing so. Since you are 17, you could also contact (anonymously, if you’re more comfortable) your local police department to see how they might handle a runaway report. Sometimes they are less likely to follow up if the youth is close to turning 18 but that depends on the department policy. If you contact us here at NRS (1-800-RUNAWAY/786-2929) we would be happy to help you make that call. We can also provide you with legal resources for your area as well as help you look at emancipation options in your state. Emancipation is court process through which a youth may gain independence. This can take some time, however.
    You said that your dad is an alcoholic, and that can be very difficult for family members, especially if you’ve been his care giver. You may want to talk with folks who’ve been dealing with similar circumstances. You can check with Families Anonymous at 1-800-736-9805. They can help you identify support groups in your area.
    We are here 24 hours a day/7 days a week and would love to hear from you. Please give us a call to talk further about your plans.
    Take care of yourself.


    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)


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