Im 17 and want to leave my mom

[Guest]

I live in CT and I'm going to be 17 next week and was wondering if I can legally leave my mom and move in with my dad. My parents are divorced and I've always lived with my mom but my mom always gets angry and recently when I brought up a memory of when an old coach of mine broke a lightbulb in the middle of my team because he was frustrated my mom said I deserved it and it was "discipline" and also said she wished I was treated like that more so I could be "less wimpy". My mom can also be overly attached to me and overworks herself and expects me to be the same.
She told me that she is going to send me back to the country we lived in before to live with my step dad and although I know it sounds silly I was wondering if she could actually force me to go to another country to live with my step dad?
The other question I have is if it is possible for me to move out and go to live with my biological father here in the united states when I turn 17? and is it possible for me to be taken back to my mom since I know she will most likely try to get the authorities involved or come and take me back by force.

[ccsmod1]

Hey there,

Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. Your old coach's actions sound scary and it's not ok for your mom to back them up. We aren't legal experts here at the National Runaway Safeline, but you are considered a minor in the state of Connecticut until you turn 18. This means your legal guardian has a say in where you stay until that point.

It may be beneficial to speak with your biological directly about your desire to live with him. Sometimes custody transfers will need to go through the family court system and it may be beneficial to speak with a legal advocate. If you need help locating a legal aid group near you you can check out https://www.lawhelp.org/find-help/. A legal aid group may also be able to give you more insight as to the legality of your mom sending you to a foreign country to be with your stepdad.

If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

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Stay safe,
NRS