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I might have to run away when I turn 18, and am trying to have a plan.

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  • I might have to run away when I turn 18, and am trying to have a plan.

    Hello, I'm seventeen years old (a junior), and I live in Maryland. My parents are verbally and emotionally abusive as well as manipulative, and living with them gets more difficult by the day. I struggle with anxiety and depression which is largely due to them, and I feel that I'm getting close to my breaking point. They find it "funny" to joke about kicking me out or making me pay rent as soon as I turn 18, have told me that it would be unacceptable if I was anything other than heterosexual, and often tell me I'm a disappointment. All of their arguments are fallacies - things like that they're always right simply because they're the parent, that I have to do what they say because I live under their roof, and that since they pay food they decide what to buy and don't care if I like it or not. If I get home late from rehearsal or work, sometimes they forget to leave food for me, and refuse to make it.

    My boyfriend is a year older than me and going to college in the fall, so when I turn 18, his parents would be willing to house and support me. However, currently, my bank accounts for spending money and all of my college tuition is under my parents' names, as is my car & its insurance, my phone bills, and quite a few other things. I was wondering what all of the laws are regarding the legality of running away, as well as getting these things (money, car, phone) under my name. Also, what are all of the things I'd need to make sure to take with me? I know passport and birth certificate for certain, but what else?

    Thank you so much for all of your help. I hope it doesn't come to this, but its been getting worse, and I'm just trying to have a plan for if worst comes to worst.

  • #2
    Hi,

    Thank you for reaching out to us; we are glad that you did. It sounds like you have lived in a very difficult and stressful situation for a number of years. You have handled it bravely and intelligently, especially knowing the difference between what is true and untrue. Clearly, the things they say about you is a reflection of how they feel about themselves and doesn’t apply to you.
    The good news is that at 18, you are not a runaway in Maryland. You are an adult and can leave without being returned home. The other things are more complicated. The car is not in your name, so unless they transfer the title to you, you can’t take it. The phone itself you might be able to take, but would likely have to get off their plan and pay for your own. Check with the provider if you can separate and keep your number under a new plan. We advise the same thing with the bank; you will have to call and ask about the type of account you have and how it was set up. That will determine whether you have a legal right to withdraw from it. You may have full access to it at 18, but only the bank can tell you for sure. We hope this helped a little, but the best way for us to help is if we can talk together.
    You can reach out to us so that we can talk it all over, so either call us at 1800-786-2929 or access our live chat via www.1800runaway.org We are here for you 24/7 to discuss all of your options.
    We hope to hear from you soon,

    Sincerely, NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      I'm 11 i get raped, it's time i run away.

      Comment


      • ccsmod15
        ccsmod15 commented
        Editing a comment
        Thank you for being so brave in reaching out to us. Please know we take your situation seriously and are here to help. It is absolutely not your fault that you are being raped. You don't have to facet this alone, however. And you do have options.

        One thing you can do is report the rape to the police or talk to an adult that you trust about what's happening. Maybe that's a relative, teacher, counselor, doctor, religious leader, or someone else. Even if you have no one in your life you feel comfortable in telling, you can talk to us. We are here 24/7 and are a confidential, safe place to talk about this and we never tell anyone what to do. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY, or you can chat with us via the link at the top of our website: www.1800runaway.org. Another agency you can reach out to is the Rape, Abuse, Incest National Network (www.rainn.org). Their number is 1-800-656-4673 and by all means feel free to reach out to them. Both us and RAINN can help you with making a report if that's what you want to do.

        It makes sense that you would want to leave home if it's an unsafe place for you. Safety and care is something you deserve. Maybe there is a way for you to live elsewhere that doesn't involve running away. We'd like to help you explore your options but would just need to know a bit more about your situation to see how we can help. Again, the best way to do that is if you give us a call (1-800-RUNAWAY) or chat with us (www.1800runaway.org).

        Please be safe. Please reach out for more help. We're here for you.

        NRS
        Last edited by ccsmod15; 04-14-2020, 10:39 AM.
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