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Can a 17 year old move out to live with her 18 year old boyfriend?

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  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi I'm 17 I live in Texas , I turn 18 in a month. I want to know if I tried to move in with my boyfriend a little early (he's 1 if I move in without permission can he and I get into any trouble?

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  • ccsmod13
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thanks for reaching out to NRS and sharing a bit about what you are going through. It sounds like your mom's abusive behavior has been very stressful and overwhelming for you. You deserve to to be treated in a way that makes you feel safe and supported. It makes sense why you are thinking about leaving to live with your boyfriend instead.

    You know when leaving is the right decision for you, but we want to make sure you can make a fully informed decision. If you leave home without your mom's permission, she can report you as a runaway. Running away is not illegal, but it does mean that your mom could have the police return you home if she knows where you are staying. There is also a possibility that she could press charges against your boyfriend for harboring a runaway. Runaway laws can vary state by state and even by county, so the best way to know for sure what would happen if you left home would be to cal the non-emergency number for the local police department. You can anonymously ask questions about the runaway and harboring protocols in your area to have a better idea of the possibilities.

    We truly want to be a support for you while you navigate this difficult situation and help you decide what your next steps are going to be. We can best be of help by phone (800-786-2929) or online chat to talk more in detail about your situation and explore options with you.

    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    In the state of Mississippi, am I able to move out at 17 (7 and a half months from being 18 ) and move in with my boyfriend who is 19 (8 and half months from being 20) without my parents consent? My mom used to be physically abusive and is verbally abusive towards me and I am mentally unstable. Staying with my mom right now is not an option. I’m a senior in high school and graduate in December 2019. My boyfriend has a full time job working in Hattiesburg (he lives with me because of his own family issues at home and we live in Lucedale) and he found an apartment for rent that’s cheap and I will also be working full time with him as soon as I turn 18.

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  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello Steve,

    Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. While we’re not legal experts we do have a great deal of experience working with runaways. It is our understanding that so long as the youth is a minor, if she leaves home without permission then you are entitled to file a runaway report with the police as her guardian. This typically permits the police to notify you if they encounter her and make sure that she returns home. Additionally, if someone is sheltering her, you do have the option to attempt to press charges against them for harboring a runaway. This is typically considered a misdemeanor offense.

    However, the likelihood of police to enforce these protocols can be varying. Some states are more lenient than others. Some police officers are more lenient than others. Sometimes a youth’s proximity to the age of majority (18 in WI) is considered in the police’s decision to enforce a runaway report. We cannot predict exactly what the police are going to do but we hope this gives you an idea of how things function.

    It may be worth it to note the importance of the 6 months between when your daughter is 17.5 and when she is 18 (when she can straight up just move out with no confusion) and what difference that short period of time will mean to you, her, and your shared relationship. While we do not know the dynamics of your family or what exactly you guys are going through, it is worth it to note that her independence is coming in a rapid and inevitable fashion. As she becomes an adult, as inexperienced or naive as she might be, it could be important to show respect for her as someone who will soon be entirely in charge of her own decisions and lifestyle. Sometimes it is less than effective to attempt to cling to parental authority as it objectively expires and doing so can damage familial relationships in less than ideal ways.

    If you want to talk more about your situation and what options you may have, please don’t hesitate to give us a call 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi! I’m from Wisconsin and my daughter who is 16 1/2 years old right now and wants to move out and live with her boyfriend and his parents when she is 17 1/2 years old. Can she do so without our permission? I know this is a touchy subject but I keep running into the same thing with no positive answer about it. Any help or someplace I can turn to would be very helpful.

    Thanks,

    Steve

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod13
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thanks for reaching out to NRS. It sounds like things with your dad have been getting more stressful over the years and you are hoping to live somewhere you feel more comfortable. It is really responsible of you to acknowledge that your dad's place has become an unhealthy living environment. Your safety and well-being is very important and you deserve to be treated in a way that makes you feel cared for.

    The easiest way to leave home before you turn 18 is with your dad's permission. If he is okay with you living with your boyfriend's family and you would be safe and taken care of then that is definitely an option. If you left without his permission, your dad would have the right to file a runaway report. You would not get into any trouble, but there is the possibility that police would return you home. However, in some cases police do not consider you a runaway at 17 years old. The best way to know for sure is to call the police department's non-emergency number and ask about their runaway protocol which can be done anonymously.

    Another option for leaving is to make a child abuse report. If you feel like your dad is not providing you with a healthy and adequate living situation, it could be a case for neglect. You can report this and get a social worker involved to help you. You can contact the national child abuse hotline (800-422-4453 ; www.childhelphotline.org) for more information and help making the report.

    We are here 24/7 to listen and help you brainstorm your next steps. Do not hesitate to reach out again by phone or chat (800-786-2929 ; www.1800runaway.org) if you want to talk in more detail about your situation and explore your options.

    Good luck,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    So I'm 16 I'm gonna be 17 on November 8th 2019 so I'm not allowed to live with my real mom its court order and now that I'm living with my dad at first it was great then over the years its getting worse so I live in a 3 bedroom trailer with my dad and step mom and my 3 brothers well over the summer I had my 2 gay cousins move in they live in the shed with 5 dogs and we share the house with them now just a week ago my 20 year old brother girlfriend just moved in so now we have 9 people living with us I've been getting missed treated it's to crowded and over whelming and a lot of stress ever since those 3 moved in me and my brother been getting missed treated my brothers girlfriend thinks shes the boss and my step mom always yell at us so I'm always hiding in my room because I get missed treated so I was wondering if i could move in with my boyfriend he lives with his grandma and uncle if i talk to his grandma to make sure it's ok with it could I I just cant stand all this stress I barely get sleep there always loud or drinking and I cant ever do my homework because I always have to clean when I get home and If i dont i get screamed at

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  • ccsmod13
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thanks for reaching out to NRS, This is a really great question to ask. You sound like you are really and caring to make sure that your boyfriend is going to be taken care of if he lives with you. It would be possible for your boyfriend to live with you if both of your parents agree to it and give permission. This would be called an alternative living arrangement, but it definitely needs the consent of your parents and your boyfriend's parents.

    We hope that this gives you the information you were looking for. If you or your parents have any other questions, please do not hesitate to reach out 24/7 by phone (1-800-786-2929) or by chat.

    Good luck,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    is it okay for my 15 year old boyfriend to stay with me, 14 , if both of out parents agree to it? he would still be going to school as we go to the same school. he would be taken care of the same way he would at home .

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod13
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,

    Thanks for reaching out to NRS for help! It is totally understandable you would want to move out to live with your boyfriend since it sounds like you are more comfortable with him that your parents. Getting into huge fights with parents can make it really stressful at home.

    We are not legal experts by any means, but we can share what do know about runaway laws. If you leave home without permission, your parents can file a runaway report. Running away is not a crime, it is something you cannot do because of your age. So you would not be arrested, but police would likely return you home if they know where you are. In some cases police do not take runaway reports for 17 year olds because you are so close to being considered a legal adult. Your local police department will have more specific information about their runaway protocol and you can ask questions by calling their non-emergency number. This is also something we can help you do if you call our hotline at 1-800-786-2929 or use our online chat service.

    Having conversations with parents can be really difficult and it sounds like your parents are escalating it into a fight when you do try to communicate with them. We can do a conference call between you and your parents. We would be on the phone with you to advocate for you and make sure you feel like you are being heard.

    Do not hesitate to reach out by phone or chat 24/7 if you want to talk more about your situation and possible options.

    Good Luck,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi I’m 17 and I love in Chicago and was to move out very badly with my boyfriend who is turning 18 pretty soon but my parents won’t let me move out and I always tell them that I’m moving out or running away and we get into huge fights. So what can I do?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi, thank you for reaching out to us; we are glad that you did. It sounds like you have been going through a lot, and for a very long time. You do not deserve to have been treated this way. At all. We are very glad that your boyfriend’s family are supportive of you and are willing to let you live with them so that you can be safe.
    Things to keep in mind if you leave: you dad would have the right to file a runaway report if you left; only you would know whether he is likely to do that. If he does, we can’t predict what the police will do. Sometimes the closer a person is to 18, the less the police will respond, but not always. There is always the risk that they would take you back. If you documented the marks and told them that you are not safe at home, are afraid to go back, and are currently safe, and can prove your age, you may be able to convince the individual officer to let you stay.
    You can also contact either us, or Child Help to file an abuse report, or www.nationalsafeplace.org for immediate help through their TXT 4 Help program.
    Texas is also tough for harboring a runaway laws. Here is a link to the information we found: https://www.versustexas.com/criminal...y-child-texas/ At the end of the article it says that “informing a law enforcement agency of the child’s location within 24 hours as a defense against being charged with harboring a runaway. This is where the evidence of physical abuse will be helpful.
    We hope that you might reach out to us to talk about everything you are going through and help you figure out your options. You can reach us via phone at 1-800-786-2929 (1-800-runaway) or with our live chat service through www.1800runaway.org
    We hope to hear from you soon.
    Sincerely, NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am from Texas and am a few months from turning 18. I live with just my dad, but we don’t get along. In many of our arguments he’s taken things to a physical level and left me with marks. While I’ve been trying to wait til I turn 18, my boyfriend and his family have been concerned for me and have been willing to have me live with them now. They live in the same city and would house me in a safe and financially-stable environment. Although I’m still going to high school and don’t have a job, or license. Would I be allowed to leave without being forced to go back?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. As a minor, you are required to live wherever your legal guardian determines. If they give you permission to leave, then it would be our understanding that you would be okay to leave. It may be a good idea to get it in writing and you may need a guardian to enroll you in school or get you medical care. If you would like to talk in greater detail about your situation, please don’t hesitate to call us on our 24/7 hotline 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am 17 and I am wanting to move out of state with my 18 year boyfriend. My mom said yes so will we have any trouble if I do?

    Leave a comment:

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