Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Can I leave my home at 16 without my parents' consent?

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest started a topic Can I leave my home at 16 without my parents' consent?

    Can I leave my home at 16 without my parents' consent?

    HI. I wanted to do this on the live chat thingy but it wasn't working for some reason, like it wouldn't let me type...but anyway I am 15 right now and
    I hate living with my family. I want to move out as soon as possible. I want to wait till I'm 16 though so I can drive. The only problem is that I know my
    parents won't let me. If I move out without their consent, can I get arrested? I live in Kentucky btw. Also, I think I am emotionally abused, but how am I
    supposed to prove that? I really want to just run away when I turn 16, but I'm afraid I'll be forced to return to my parents,and my dad will be super angry
    at me. I am scared of what he would do If I ran away and then had to return. Can I be legally forced to go home if I refuse? If I have to go to court or some
    thing will I need a lawyer? How will I pay for it? Thanks for the help in advance!

  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi,

    Thanks for reaching out. We’re sorry to hear things are so overwhelming at home. It’s understandable that you would want to leave and live with a friend, but it’s good that you’re asking for some more information before taking any big steps.

    Your safety is of utmost importance. If you feel like you’re being abused and want to report it, or simply want to talk to someone about what’s going on at home, you can call Child Help at 1-800-422-4453. You can also call our crisis center at 1-800-786-2929 or try our online chat at 1800runaway.org if calling isn’t your thing. Someone is always available to listen and to help.

    Technically, it would not be illegal for you to run away at 16, but your parents could file a runaway report and the police may try to bring you back home. It would be considered a status offense to run away at that age, but you would remain a minor and under your parents’ or guardians’ custody. It may be worth exploring other options, especially as you feel abused at home and have the right to report that in search of a safer environment.

    If you have any further questions about this or simply want to talk to someone, don’t hesitate to reach out to either of the numbers we provided. It sounds like you’re in a really tough situation. It can make a world of difference to talk with someone else about what you’re going through. Thanks again for reaching out and we hope to hear from you soon.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am 14 at the moment. I live in Colorado. I have done research on what the rules are on leaving home before 18. I have a mapped out plan, But I want to leave at 16 (So I can get a drivers license.) I have a friend in Texas who Ive known for a while and am. very close too that I decided would be the best course of action to move in with if I ran away. I could go to school, have shelter, food and water, and basically all my needs. I would be able to make an income for myself as well. My plan at the moment is to wait until I am 16 to go anywhere. My friend has agreed to the idea, and we have two years to think about it and if it will work out. But I am not sure if I can do this without the police coming for me. I feel abused in my house, and I genuinely feel like it would be better for me to move out. I am really not sure what I can do. Do you have suggestions?? I need to get out of here as soon as possible.
    Last edited by ccsmod15; 03-22-2019, 02:08 PM.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod9
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. It might be a good idea to consider talking to a lawyer who might be able to answer those questions. We can try talking through things so please feel free to reach out to us at any time.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    We hope to hear from you soon.
    Be safe, NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    hi im 16 and an immigrant to the united states my dad wants to send me back home but i know that i would not have a future there. if my mom lets me come back to the US and allows me to stay with my friends family and my dad finds out would he be able to do anything ? like file a runaway report or try and take me from them?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    t sounds like you have been going through a lot, so we are glad you are reaching out to us in your time of need because we are here to help. You mentioned that one of the choices you have is to commit suicide. Have you talked to anyone about those feelings? If not, we want you to know that you are not alone and that there are people out there to talk to. We have people on our hotline that can discuss your situation and your feelings 24/7. We can be reached at 1-800-786-2929. We would also like to empower you to reach out to other resources like the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. They offer free and confidential support whenever you would like to talk. Another is the Crisis Text Line, they can be reached by texting “HOME” to 741741. They will put you in contact with a counselor who receives the text and can respond about any type of crisis.

    You also mentioned that you have a lot of plans when you’re grown and dreams you want to reach. It’s great to hear that you have goals and are working toward your future. For those plans, have you identified ways that you can get there? Sometimes taking small steps (ex. raising your grades or learning new skills) to reach those goals may help to feel as if you aren’t trapped in jail.

    You also said that you did some things in the past and shared a bit about bringing alcohol to school, getting arrested, and stealing from your mom. Have you been able to talk to someone about those things since they happened? Sometimes talking it out with someone (such a school counselor or trusted adult) may help you to make choices you feel work in your favor. If you wanted to talk to someone about this, our number (1-800-786-2929) is also a good first step in expressing your feelings or talking about these situations. We could talk with you about your former choices and talk about your current ones as well. We could even discuss ways you could talk to your mother if that is something you are interested in.

    Earlier in your message, you mentioned that all you do is go to school, home, and repeat, but you also mentioned that you were on the football team before. Is getting involved in sports again something you would consider an option? Getting involved may help to break up the “school, home, and repeat” schedule you mentioned earlier. If sports aren’t an option right now, are there other clubs or activities that interest you that could break up the week?

    Lastly, you talked about running away. While we aren’t legal experts, we can say that running away isn’t illegal, but is considered a status offense. That means that your mom could file a runaway report with the police, which would give her the option to press charges against anyone that takes you in without her consent (this includes your grandmother and/or biological father). Since you mentioned that you have been arrested before, the police may treat this case differently, but in most cases the police would just return you to your mom’s house if they were to pick you up.

    Like we said before, we are here to help but we are also here to listen. If you wanted to discuss any of the options we mentioned before, our hotline is free, confidential, and available 24/7.

    Best of luck!

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi I’m 16 years old, about to turn 17 this upcoming January which will be next year. There’s a lot of problems happening in my life, it feels like as if I’m trapped in a jail cell the rest of my life. All I do is go to school, home, and repeat. I live with my mom and her (Fiancé), and it’s been a nightmare ever since. I live in Washington (Spanaway area). The only choices I’ve got is to move back with my grandma which I doubt she’ll even accept me for the fact that she has a lot of people living with her, and she’s struggling. I did a lot of terrible things as well, it wasn’t my choices but it just happened you know? I don’t like the way I get treated. My mom yells at the top of her lungs, her fiancé is nice to me to be honest. I’m the oldest out of my (4) siblings. I have no phones, no electronic except an iPad that I use for school only. School isn’t really for me, I’m failing everything and it’s ruining my life, I have no motivations of doing schoolwork since my parents wants to be all petty and stuff. My parents have high standards, as for me being the oldest they want good grades to get better things. I turned my life upside down last year (2016-17), I brought hard liquor to school and got arrested, got kicked out of my varsity football team, stole stuff that my mom owned. That’s why it’s reflecting back to me. It’s those type of choices that I’ve made, which will haunt me the rest of my life. That’s the worst thing a child can do to its parents. All I want to do is to leave my moms house without her consent. Move as far away as possible, unseen, and unknown. I know things will get lighter for her when I’m gone. She’ll be happy that I’m gone anyways. I wanted to reach out to my biological father, but I doubt he’ll even reach back since he left me 16 years for good. The only choices i got it is suicide and running away. I have a lot of plans when I’m grown, dreams I have to reach. I don’t need parents to support me through, I wanna do it myself. I would write plenty more but this is it for now.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod10
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for telling us your story and reaching out. It can be difficult telling others what has happened to you. Everyone experiences things differently, so no manner what others go through these are your experiences and you have a right to feel how you feel. Running away is a big decision and it can be very stressful to figure out what you want to do, but you don’t have to do it alone. We’re not legal experts here at NRS. Generally it’s not illegal to leave home, but your parent could file a runaway report, the police could get involved, and they could bring you home. The people you’re staying with could potentially get charged with what is called “harboring, “if your father does not give you permission to stay there. You could consider calling your local non-emergency police department to ask about their policies. We also have legal aid resources here if you have specific questions about the laws in your state.

    You mentioned depression. If you’re not currently getting mental health resources, it can be really helpful to get treatment. As your mental health suffers, you have limited ability to handle the other stressors in your life. You can contact SAMHSA to connect you to mental health resources at 1-877-726-4727 or samhsa.gov.
    If you don’t feel safe and feel like you need to get away Nationalsafeplace.org provides a safe location for you to meet a staff member who can take you to a designated place where you can discuss all options about how to stay safe. You can text 69866 the word “safe,” and your location (Ex:69866ChicagoSafe) to find a safe location in your area. Once you arrive let someone who works there know you need help connecting with a staff member.

    One service we can offer is to conference call with your parents. This way you could have a conversation with your parents but you would not be alone. For example, it may be hard for you to explain to your dad why you want to leave. Sometimes those conversations go better in a conference call because we can advocate for you. If you want to reach us, you can chat with us anytime at 1800runaway.org or call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We’re here 24/7, and we are ready to listen and help however we can.

    You’ve been very courageous to reach out for help and try your best despite the circumstances.
    Take care
    -NRS.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hello. I'm 16 years of age, and live in Florida. My situation is somewhat unique, though probably not as uncommon as I think. I live with my grandparents, but from a legal standpoint my father has guardianship over me. Honestly, compared to some of the stuff I've read, my situation isn't bad at all. I'm not abused or neglected, and I'm treated well enough, but I want to move out. It's not like I don't have a reason, however. I've been homeschooled ever since I've lived with them, and have had practically no social activity whatsoever during that time, which has led me to what I believe to likely be some form of depression. Beyond that, I can't even relax or let my guard down for a second around anyone, because of the implications that I would be left with due to their beliefs and, while they would believe it to be in my best interest, what they would do would do nothing but cause me lots of stress, anxiety, and grief, even more so than I'm already dealing with. I feel like every single action I make is akin to a move in a fight, due to the consequences that follow each and every one, and I am aware that it probably isn't healthy for me. I've thought over discussing moving out with them, but I know that they, believing it to be in my best interest, would never allow it. Besides, even if they did, my father would have the final say from what I've read, and he would never go for it even if I had the chance to talk it over with him, if a conversation even took place, which would be unlikely due to the physical distance between us. I have a feeling I know how a response to this will look, but I'm hoping for some advice on this matter, because the last thing I need is to make a life altering decision like this and do it incorrectly. Thank you in advance for any advice you can give me.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello There,
    Thank you for contacting The National Runaway Safeline, we know it takes courage to reach out and we are so glad you did. It sounds like you are going through a really frustrating time right now. You could consider talking to your parents about how you are feeling. They may not even realize how you are feeling or the way they are treating you. At NRS we offer conference calling where if you call us we can call out to your parents and help you have a conversation with them. Conference calling is there to help provide support to you and help mediate the conversation so that you are heard. You may want to consider talking to a teacher or school counselor on ways you can bring up your grades. A lot of times if you explain your situation the school may be willing to work with you.
    You mentioned wanting to leave home senior year or even now. We are not experts on the law but do have general information. If you were to leave before tuning 18 in most states you could be considered as a runaway. If the police found you they most likely would bring you back home. If you would like to discuss your options with us or figure out a plan, you can call us at any time.
    We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to discuss your situation in further detail, please give us a call at any time. We wish you the best of luck, stay strong!
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Okay well im 16 i want to leave my house its so hard to stay here i was adopted at 12 and i think i rushed into the adoption i dont want to stay here i moved out of a place where i only took care of myself where now i take care of their kids and their older kid hes 18 and doesnt do half the stuff i do. i have almost all F´s in school and im trying to get it up but each time i try to do my homework the mom always ask me to do stuff for her make dinner do her laundry watch her kids clean the house im 16 i cant keep doing this for them im leaving next year senior year but i dont know if i can stay here another year and clean and care for people like im their mother. So all im asking or seeing is how do i leave this house, how do i leave like who do i have to contact.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for contacting us at the National Runaway Safeline. It takes great courage to reach out for help and we are glad that you decided to reach out for help.

    We are sorry to hear that things are hard at home. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If your safety is at risk you can call 911. You can also call Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 and they help provide you more info on filing an abuse report. It sounds like you have been thinking about leaving home. Running away from home can be hard and it can be helpful to think about where you might stay and how you might pay for food, rent and other living expenses. While we are not legal experts as you mentioned there can be some consequences to your friends if you are to leave home. In some cases the police may not pursue a runaway at 17. It is best to call the local police department emergency number to find that out. Emancipation could be another option however that generally requires you to prove that you can live by yourself and support yourself. If you call us at our 24 hour confidential hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY(786-2929) look into emancipation, listen to you, explore your situation and provide any resources.

    This seems like a hard situation and you are doing great by reaching out for help. We wish you the best and hope to hear from you soon.

    Best,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I live in Pennsylvania, I am less then 6 months to 18 years old, my parents are emotionally and mentally draining me, and even have started getting physical. School is supportive of me transferring to Delaware, but I dont want my friend to be charged for kidnapping, so I ask here, am I legally allowed to leave? The internet won't tell me anything and I just want info. Children and youth said yes, and my mom (who has custody over me) has basically said, make sure you can actually leave, because I will call the police when you do. So basically she doesn't care but does not want to be charged

    Thanks

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello there,

    Thank you for reaching out to NRS and having the strength to share your story with us. We are sorry to hear about your situation and what you’ve been dealing with. It sounds like you’re doing your best to be a good parent in really caring for your daughter’s well-being and just wanting what’s best for her. We cannot tell you what choices to make, however if she were to leave, we could help her decide the safest route to do so, by reality-checking her expectations for leaving and safety-planning.

    Additionally, Team H.O.P.E (Help Offering Parents Empowerment) does great work in helping parents with emotional support if your youth does leave. We are sorry that you have been placed in this position. If your daughter feels like reaching out, we are available 24/7, toll-free, and are completely confidential.

    We hope this information was helpful and take care.
    National Runaway Safeline
    info@1800runaway.org (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am a Mom on the other side of this. My daughter is almost 17 and does not like living with me and wants to move out. She refuses to go to school, do any chores in the house or show respect for anyone. We have been to counselors and she says that I just don't understand her. Our same argument is if you live here, your job is school and cleaning your room so she does not want to live here. I am not opposed to her leaving but I want her to be successful. Currently she has no driver's license, no desire to get one, no identification, no job and no knowledge of how to support and take care of herself. I suggested that we start "life lessons" since she refuses to go to school but her response to me is "I do not want to learn". My question is, do I let her leave and face the realities of living on her own (at her friends house) or do I make her stay? I feel like I am failing no matter what I do. From a teenager's perspective, am I a horrible parent or do I let her do what she wants?

    Leave a comment:

Previously entered content was automatically saved. Restore or Discard.
Auto-Saved
x
Insert: Thumbnail Small Medium Large Fullsize Remove  
x
x
Working...
X