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  • i'm 17 i want to leave home

    i am 17 I've been having issues at home so i want to live with my 18 year old boyfriend i am in the state of Texas and my parents used to let us date but now they just wont let us see each other its not only that but I've been having issues at home. i will be turning 18 on June 21 which is a long way from now

  • #2
    RE: i'm 17 i want to leave home

    Hello there –

    Thank you for reaching to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. We are always here to listen and here to help in any way that we can. We hope that by helping you on our public forum that others that might be in similar situations or the same questions, can read through and find our reply helpful. It can be very frustrating not knowing what to do or what your next step might be from this point on.

    It seems like you have similar questions or situation to others that have written into out online forum. You can find some answers to your questions by reading through our public thread on leaving home at 17 in Texas (http://bulletinboards.1800runaway.or...ighlight=Texas). If you have specific questions that you want to ask us or just to talk to us about your feelings. It’s hard to talk to just anyone one about what has been going on. We certainly want to help you. If you give us a call on our 24/7 hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) we could help you find resources in your area and could potentially help you brainstorm a possible solution to the issues you are having. We would love to talk to you about what has been going on recently that is making you want to leave home.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      I'm 17 and my dad is a drunk. And he's bipolar. I'm so ready to leave home (I have been for awhile) but i don't own my car nor do I have a job because my dad won't let me get one. My best friend told me that I can move in with her but I don't know if I should or not. My dad makes me very depressed and controls who I am friends with and what I can do. He doesn't let me do anything that a normal 17 year old should be able to freely do.

      Comment


      • ccsmod5
        ccsmod5 commented
        Editing a comment
        Thank you for reaching out. It’s clear from what you’ve described that this is a very difficult and heavy situation to be in, especially when you have so much else going on with school, friends etc.
        It sounds like from what you’ve explained that your dad is very controlling in many of these situations, first with not allowing you to have your own car or hold your own job, and then controlling who you’re hanging out with. It seems there’s a level of distrust between you and your dad. Having a parent that is dealing with a mental illness can add another layer of stress on top of everything else you’re dealing with as well.
        It’s completely understandable why you would want to move out and live with your best friend. While we are not legal experts, we do want you to understand what could potentially happen if you left without your dad’s permission. While it would not be illegal to move in with your best friend, your dad could file a runaway report since you are not a legal adult and your case would be considered a status offense. If a runaway report is filed and the police find you, they would bring you home and your friend’s family could also face charges for harboring.
        It may be a good idea to try and talk with your dad directly and gain his permission about leaving because of the amount of stress you are dealing with at home. If this seems like an uncomfortable option, we offer a conference call service in which you could contact our hotline directly. We would then contact your dad to set up a mediating service between you both. This option provides a lot of backup support and can help you remain confident in your talk with your dad.
        You mentioned feelings of depression and feeling stuck as well. Our hotline is available 24/7 to listen to what you are going through and provide as much help and resources as we can. We certainly want you to feel safe and heard while you are going through this time, so we definitely encourage you to reach out.
        Good luck!

    • #4
      I'm 17 and I'm 18 in November. But my home life is awful. My sister is my guardian and she's very controlling when she's home. She's extremely mean and doesn't act normal when giving out punishments. I have a place to live it's with my bf and his family. They have offered to take me in. My sister gave me a verbal ok to leave before I'm 18 but when I tried to get it on paper she ripped it up and acted immature. I really cant wait till November and I wanna leave. She makes me extremely depressed I barely have a life bc I can never leave my house bc theres also something. What can I do??

      Comment


      • ccsmod10
        ccsmod10 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there.

        Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are having a very difficult time at home with your sister. It’s also good to hear that you have somewhere safe to stay with your boyfriend’s family.

        We are not legal experts, but we can share some some legal rules of thumb:
        It’s not against the law to leave home without your guardian’s permission, but it’s a “status offense” that could result in you being brought home if your sister files a runaway report.
        If your sister files a runaway report, it is possible (though unlikely) that your boyfriend’s parents could be prosecuted for knowingly harboring a runaway since this is illegal.
        You are very close to being 18 and being a legal adult -- so police in your area may not want to take any action -- regardless if your sister files a runaway report. If you want to get a more definitive answer on this, you could visit or call your local police department and ask them these questions since each police department may enforce these laws a little differently.

        Thank you again for reaching out to us and we hope this information has been helpful for you during this difficult time. If you would like to talk through this anymore, please don’t hesitate to call us at the National Runaway Safeline. You can reach us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We are here 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

    • #5
      My life is really bad right now, not abusived but bad, I've been considering running away but never was able to go through with it until now. I'm 17, bullied at school, used to live with a verbally abusive brother who was kicked out... my parents protected me but... they've kinda always ignored me As Well, they'll ask how I am then go back to them... my parents always make me feel bad about what I eat and my weight, they are constantly telling me how to act and who to be. I never do stuff I wanna do outside of school. I yelled at them today and they turned off my phone so I can't contact my friends for comfort... I feel invisible, all the time. I want someone to see me! So, sience I have income I want to run away. I have a 18 year old boyfriend at college semi near by and I can most likely transfer work but I'm scared of my parents reaction if they found out

      Comment


      • #6
        Hi there,

        Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We're sorry to hear about everything that has been going on and want you to know that you deserve to feel safe and happy at school and at home.

        We understand how difficult it is to reach out for help and know that bullying can be a hard thing to handle. Is there anyone at school, like a counselor or coach or other adult you trust, that you feel can advocate for you? If not, we're here 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929 and could be there for you to just listen or to help you identify who could help stand up for you in school. You could also check out resources like stopbullying.gov to look up strategies for coping or to connect with other teens that are going through similar things as you.

        We are not legal experts, but we can tell you that because you are a minor, if you leave and your parents file a runaway report, you could be returned home. There could also be legal consequences for your boyfriend or whomever you stay with for what is called harboring a runaway. If you want a liner to help you walk through other options like us mediating a conference call between you and your parents so you could safely voice your feelings surrounding their criticism of your weight, thinking through possible adults that you could turn to or could advocate for you, or things like emancipation and legal aid numbers, don't hesitate to give us a call. Another thing you can do is reach out to your local police to inquire how they handle runaway reports for 17 year olds. Some cities and departments treat them differently because a 17 year old is so close to becoming a legal adult. The way to get the most accurate information would be to call your local police non-emergency number and anonymously inquire about their practices.

        Let us know how we can best help,

        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #7
          My girlfriend is 17(3 months away from turning 1. Long story short, she's had a terrible life. She currently lives with a guardian (not related to her) and her home life is extremely bad at the moment. She lives in Pennsylvania and I live in Tennessee. She wants to move in with me now instead of waiting until she is 18. She can't ask her guardian for permission because at this point, it seems as if the guardian is doing whatever she can to make her life as miserable as possible until she turns 18. The guardian shares custody with her biological mother. Her bio-mother has given her permission to live with me. I know 17 is a gray area. I just want to be sure I am not likely to get in any legal trouble if she moves in with me.

          Comment


          • ccsmod5
            ccsmod5 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi,
            Thank you for reaching out. It sounds like your friend is in a tough situation and we’re glad that she has you as a support in her life. Thank you for trying to advocate for her and her safety. We aren’t legal experts, but can give some general information. So as you said, 17 is a “gray area.” Her guardian would technically have the right to file a runaway report if your girlfriend decides to leave, but there is a possibility that the police would decide not to pursue it. As for you, there is a possibility that you could be charged with harboring a runaway but this is not a charge we hear about often and so seems unlikely.
            If you would like to speak more specifically about what’s been going on or need additional resources, you’re welcome to

        • #8
          Originally posted by ccsmod5 View Post
          Hi,
          Thank you for reaching out. It sounds like your friend is in a tough situation and we’re glad that she has you as a support in her life. Thank you for trying to advocate for her and her safety. We aren’t legal experts, but can give some general information. So as you said, 17 is a “gray area.” Her guardian would technically have the right to file a runaway report if your girlfriend decides to leave, but there is a possibility that the police would decide not to pursue it. As for you, there is a possibility that you could be charged with harboring a runaway but this is not a charge we hear about often and so seems unlikely.
          If you would like to speak more specifically about what’s been going on or need additional resources, you’re welcome to
          That would be fantastic how can I reach out?

          Comment


          • ccsmod5
            ccsmod5 commented
            Editing a comment
            Sorry! Looks like our number got cut off. Our number is 1-800-786-2929! Thanks!
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