Runaway from a group home

[Guest]

Aiii y’all so I’m bout to be put in placement tm Because I missed one day of school and I don’t think it’s worth me going Thur the mental trama again and I have a run away plan I just don’t know if I should run or not cuz i don’t have any charges or anything that I can go to jail for later on and I’m not on probation . But after I turn 18 if I get caught will that get me into trouble . And is it worth running away I just spent 2 and a half years in placement and finally came home and they is tryna send me back for no reason what do u guys think I should do cuz ion think I can make it another year and 9 months in placement (that’s when I turn 1

[ccsmod10]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.

While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. Usually when an individual turns 18 any runaway report will become invalid due to the individual is now an adult. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.

We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,

NRS

[Guest]

Hi I am a runaway from a group home facility, my custody was handed over to dsc before I got sent to a group home I was only there for a day,reason why I was sent there is because I got caught being a runaway and arrested for illegal substances I FOUND in Walmart. And also have no family. Previously ran away from my sister who was trying to get custudy but gave up on me and wanted to put me in a group home so I ran away the FIRST TIME then got caught, ., I have no family left ,I was adopted at the age 3 by a mother who was verry abusive and a drugy,she beat me up good for last time and called cops on her, didn't want to be put in Foster care again cause I had gotten raped in a previous house I was in and well no one did anything about it cause It was a long time ago and there was no way I was going through that process again, so I ran away from my sisters cause she was trying to put me back in AND THEN from the group home cause I was scared and I wanted to feel safe again ... had a dcs worker but she no longer works for dcs,I am currently 16 years old I don't turn 17 till may,
,i ran away with my spouse ,and he is taking care of me along with HIS family, I have no id and no paper work nothing, I want to get emaciated WITHOUT them taking me away from some where I feel safe and at home or AT LEAST have Someone help Me get my id and or paper work so I can get a actual job,... I'm still on the run and I've been for a while , I just need my identification or PLEASE help me get emancipated so I can stop stressing and LIVE and START
MY LIFE,. Can u please help me or give me advice.

[ccsmod1]

Hey there,

Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It sounds like you've hone through a lot in your life and your determination to begin your adult life shows how strong and resilient you are. The abuse that you were subjected to by your mother and foster family is absolutely unacceptable and you should not have had to go through that. Feelings related to this kind of past trauma can linger and it can be really hard to deal with this alone and sometimes it’s helpful to reach out to additional agencies for support. One really great resource for all survivors of sexual assault or abuse is RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network). You can call them any time 24/7 at 1-800-656-4673, or go to www.rainn.org to use their online hotline. RAINN is the National Sexual Assault Hotline and has a lot of services, support and resources that you may find helpful.

You mentioned that you were currently staying with your spouse. In most states getting legally married would automatically emancipate you. It may be worthwhile to speak with a legal aid group in your area to verify your local emancipation laws. You can find a legal aid group near you by going to https://www.lawhelp.org/find-help. You can also reach out to your county clerk/registrar/office of records to see if it would be possible to procure ID/reissue identification documents without a guardian being there.

Some employers are more lax about hiring policies and you could possibly find work "under the table" - meaning that it would not be reported. It is worth mentioning that some employers exploit undocumented workers and can push them into dangerous situations or possibly violate their human rights. You can find out more about how to recognize and avoid these practices by going to https://polarisproject.org/human-tra...ecognize-signs.

If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

Stay safe,
NRS

[Guest]

hi im 17 and i will be 18 in 10 months i dont know what to do i live in a group home i dont feel safe and i have no where to go what should i do?

[ccsmod1]

Hey there,

Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. You mentioned that you do not feel safe at your current group home. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. If any harm or abuse is happening where you are, you have the right to report it.

Once you turn 18 you will be considered a legal adult (barring any kind of legal restraints or court-ordered guardians) and you will be able to live wherever you please. If you need to locate shelter or housing resources you can check out the National Homeless Shelter Directory by going to homelessshelterdirectory.org. You can also try reaching out to your local United Way by dialing 211 as they may be able to refer you to other local agencies.

If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

Stay safe,
NRS

[Guest]

i wanna runaway

[ccsmod7]

Hi there,

Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you doing so. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

We hope to hear from you soon.

Be safe,

NRS

[Guest]

Im a 15 years old and I have been living with my dad and stepmom and two siblings are ever since i was about ten before then I was with my mom and dad my older brother which me and my older brother are very close not talking about the siblings im with now my older Brother lives with our grandfather and uncle and aunt, anyways to make it a quick story my mother passed away of a drug overdose when I was 9 me and my mom were also extremely close but at that time my dad wasn’t living with us anymore cause they broke up it was just me my older brother and our grandparents around close to a year later my dad took me away cause he was legal custody and ever since then it was been hell. I havent really been close to my dad or anybody in the family on my dads side he has a very lazy wife who makes me watch the kids all the time and makes me do everything for her clean for her i know that doesnt sound bad but theres more she has been ever since i first started living there it was a new culture to me I wasnt use to doing stuff the way they would do it she would call me a “********ing idiot” dumb or something then mock my dead mother and talk about my side of the family badly she even at one time said she hated me when i was 12 my dad didnt do anything she gets mad over simple stuff and then stresses me up and then i do bad in school and all they say is that i dont care about school or that i didnt try but im stressed and depressed the both of the are always fighting and screaming in each others faces and pushing and stuff and they both leave after a fight or the kids just come to me im always babysitting and i cant take it i tell my dad this he doesnt do anything i miss my older brother and whenever i do go see my moms side of the family im happy extremely happy but going back home i feel like throwing up very badly and i get very bad anxiety im always in a low mood even more when my stepmoms around I wanted to end my life so many times but im just to scared to Im about to be 16 i dont want to live here but dont know what to do my moms dead and i cant choose where i wanna live everyone on my moms side cant do anything and is scared to tell my dad what I tell them because they know he wont let me go up to them anymore even my stepmom said if my dad dies that she wont let me see my older brother and she said she signed papers so i cant leave my siblings? Im so confused and to the point where i wanna do suicide this sounds like nothing to some people but its everyday and it effects you and makes you stressful im always stuck with their kids and i cant even do teenager things im always home and it’s horrible I dont know how much long i can take it i really dont and if i call cps and they find out im in trouble and what if cps doesnt do anything then my life gets worse to the point where i will 100% kill myself it goes worse and worse please help. Both my dad and stepmom are manipulative towards me and I hate them I wanna runaway i wanna call cps im scared my dad can get very angry over nothing and I hate it

[ccsmod13]

Hi there,

Thank you for taking the time to reach out to NRS and for sharing your story. We are 24/7 to listen and to act as your support in figuring out your next steps in this difficult situation. Asking for help was really responsible and smart of you. We are sorry to hear things are so unstable and unsafe at home. You deserve to live somewhere that makes you feel cared for and supported.

It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and like you’re fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change. Your safety and well-being is important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255 (www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org) is always available if you need someone to talk to about how you have been feeling. Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. Reaching out to a school counselor or another adult that you trust could also be a good outlet for you as well. A school counselor is a mandated reporter. They are obligated to make a report to CPS if you share that you are experiencing abuse at home, and they can also be an advocate for you as well through the process.

There is an organization called Child Help, 1-800-422-4453; www.childhelphotline.org, which is dedicated to advocating for and supporting young people who are experiencing abuse and do not feel safe at home. Making a report to CPS can be scary and you do not have to do it alone. If you reach out to Child Help they can give you more information about the reporting process and how a social worker might intervene, so that you feel you are more prepared to make the decision to report.

You are incredibly strong for still wanting to talk about your situation at home and for reaching out for help. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. Please do not hesitate to reach out again by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org.

We wish you the best,
NRS

[Guest]

Hi my name is June I am thinking about running away from my group home its called community options the reason why is because I'm tired of being stuck inside all day I have tryed to talk to my support coordinator but all she says is lets talk to staff but that don't work

[ccsmod0]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without your guardian's permission, in this case the group home staff. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS

[Guest]

Hello, Im a 14 year old female and i live in a group home, I've been here since i was 12 and I'm thinking about running away tonight with all my stuff. I want to go home and I've informed my caseworker and gal many many times I'm having difficulties in here and they have done nothing yet about it. Im not okay because all the staff call me a whore for liking to leave at 4 or 5 and return at 9 or 10 with no trouble. I only play at the park because thats my happy place, they think im having intercourse and im not. I speak to my family and they tell me leaving isnt a good idea but my head is so foggy I can't listen or i just ignore them. I Currently locked myself in my room because i feel like no one understands and what makes it even harder is im the only African American female in here. Please help me

[ccsmod15]

Hello!
Thank you for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline! It sounds like a very difficult situation you are going through. You are not alone in this. You do not deserve to have anyone talk to you like that. You can always reach out to NAMI. They can help you with how you are feeling and give you some potential resources to help things further. Their number is 1800-950-NAMI or you can text NAMI to 741741.
In addition to them, we can try answer any questions you have and provide support as well. You can reach us at 1800-786-2929 or you can chat with us via our live chat at www.1800runaway.org. Our hotline is available 24/7 and confidential. We are here to help, here to listen.
Stay safe!

[Guest]

Hi my name is June I am 21 years old and live in a group home for adults with disabilities I have DSPD services and the state i live in is Utah and if I run away my group home says they have to file a missing persons report when the cops find me would I go to jail or would they drive me back I'm I'm only going to the church down the road from me.

[ccsmod4]

Hello June,
Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. You might consider asking for permission to attend the church down the road from your case manager or the administrator (if there is one). Another option is to inform the police department of your whereabouts if you think there is a missing person’s report out on you. It sounds like there is some concern for your safety so it might be helpful if you could work something out with the group home or possibly the church about transportation there and back.
We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.

Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

So I’ve been in this group home since February of 2019, because of a negligent mother with drug issues, right? I started off pretty chill, and I was pretty ok with being there, I just wouldn’t talk to anyone. I was more reserved, doing my own thing. My social worker had told me that reunification with my biological mom would be sometime in August 2019, so I thought, that’s not too long, I can wait six months no problem. Then, my god damn social worker quit his job as a social worker last second and the judge told me I had to wait until February of 2020 for reunification. “Well ******** I’m gonna be in the system for a year. At least I’ll get free college.” So I waited it out, having to put up with the challenged kids and the stupid house staff here at the group home, thinking, “I got this.” Then they told me in February “another six months.” It was around that point where I got so pissed off that I’d started becoming rebellious and cynical. Now I’m in a situation involving drugs and school.

I have the three of the group home managers, my social worker, and the home staff constantly on my ass about abstaining from drugs. I won’t get into detail about that tho. Now, school. I’ve got ADHD, so there’s never been a school year in my life that I’ve had anything higher than a C. Recently, I’ve realized that school just isn’t for me. No matter how much effort I put into attempting to get school work done, my brain always just shuts off. So I decided that I wanna drop out and become a musician. Of course the system can’t support that idea, so they told me it wasn’t an option and that I’d have to get my school work done, otherwise I’ll get sent to another group home in a different county where it’s way stricter. Now I’m at a dilemma. I either have to cave in to the mental prison known as school in order to stay in the area I’ve grown so attached to or keep not doing the work and get kicked out of the group home, which is kinda what I want, but I’d get sent to another ********ing group home.

My only solution at this point is to AWOL. Nothing has, is and ever will work out for me here in the system. There are some abandoned houses about 30 minutes away from the house I’m currently at that I could stay in until I turn 18 in 2021. It would be super risky, but I rly don’t have a choice. And I refuse to fall in line with the bull******** they want me to do. What should I do??

[ccsmod4]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing what’s been going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. It sounds like you are caught between leaving your current group home where you feel most comfortable to leaving and trying to survive in abandoned housing. There seems to be an issue for you with the school work and dedication to do it. This plays a role in your dilemma.
It sounds like you would like to stay there but the question is what type of plan might you come up with to make things simpler for you?

Perhaps joining a study group or getting a tutor might help. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. Often, having a safe space to share your thoughts or feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of.
NRS is here to listen and here to help. If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in.
We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best

Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

I have a friend who is in a group home and she is over the age of 18 and they wont let her leave. She has asked the courts for help. She has tried to prove that she knows how to fend for herself as an adult and the group home staff tell the courts that she is not mentally stable to be out on her own and the judge takes the staffs side over my friend. They have even told the judge that she is delusional. How can i help my friend out of her group home.

[ccsmod15]

Hey there,
Thanks for reaching out to NRS on behalf of your friend. It seems like a really frustrating situation to be in and to watch. It seems like the professional doesn’t agree with your friend that she is fully able to be safe on her own. Unfortunately without convincing a judge to release her it may be hard to get them out of that situation. It’s possible that another health professional could argue on behalf of your friend as well.
In this case finding legal, or mental health help outside of the facility your friend is in is the most legal way to help them and try to convince a judge. There may also be things your friend could do within the facility to try and ‘prove’ that she is ok to be out.
Hopefully this information helps, if you have more questions feel free to contact our hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

[Guest]

Hey im about 14. and I wanna run away from home. My dad told me he was sending me to a childrens home. By the end of this week, I wont be able to be released till im 18. He doesnt want me back bc im a mistake and a troubled child. So i packed a bag and some hair dye, so i could change my appearance. I havent made any decisions, till i see my dad with the actual paper work then i know what to do....RUN

[ccsmod1]

Hey there,

Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It seems like there has been a lot of tension with your dad in the past and that the relationship has been uneasy for some time. It must be really scary to hear that you may be sent elsewhere. Running away is a big decision and it can be very stressful to figure out what you want to do.

It’s important to consider all the possibilities that can occur if you leave home. You will need to plan out how you will cover basic necessities like travel, food, clothing, etc. If you have a place to go in mind, it’s good to see what the expectations of the living arrangement will be like; rules, the amount of time you’re allowed to stay, if you’re expected to contribute financially, etc. Living on your own can also bring about many safety risks. You will need to consider ways that you can protect yourself from physical harm as well as the possibility of sexual and labor exploitation. This can all influence your next steps.

It sounds really exhausting to be so at odds with your dad. It could be a good idea to work with a local family counselor or have a conversation mediated by a school counselor/social worker, trusted friend, or family member to help clear the air. If you'd like, you can also call us directly and we can conduct a conference call with your dad so you have a safe environment where you can express yourself.

If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

Stay safe,
NRS

[Guest]

My name is S****** (edited to protect confidentiality.) I live in a group home and want to get out and I can't runaway cause the police will be called I know where I can go but how to get out with out getting in trouble I'm 24 and I need your help what can I do to get out

[ccsmod3]

Dear S.,

Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are an adult who currently lives in a group home. We would be happy to talk to you more about your situation including what might happen if you decide to leave. To begin talking to us one-on-one through our Live Chat, please click here: https://m2.icarol.com/ConsumerRegist...=64382&pid=254.

Best of luck!

-NRS

[Guest]

Im 17 years old I turn 18 in in November Im about to run away from my group home tonight the group home is ******** they make me feel like ******** if I leave can they force me to go back ?

[ccsmod1]

Hi there,

Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes a lot of courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there’s a lot that you’re faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.

18 years old is generally the age that an individual can leave home without permission from their parent or legal guardian. We aren’t legal experts, but we can speak in general terms. If you’re under 18 and leave your group home without permission, whoever is in charge at the group home may file a runaway report with the police. What actions the police take once you are filed as a runaway can vary a lot from state to state and even city to city - so we can’t predict exactly what would happen in your case. Generally speaking, if you encounter a police officer while reported as a runaway, you’ll likely be returned to the group home. In that case there may be services (counseling, etc.) available to you as a youth in crisis/runaway, but police procedures related to offering those services can be different based on your location and the details of your situation. Another thing to consider is that while running away is not a crime, a legal adult who allows you to stay with them may be putting themselves at risk for being charged with harboring a runaway. One way to find out about the laws in your area is to call your local police precinct and ask what their policies are regarding runaway youth.

We’re here to listen, and we’re here to help in any way we can. We can best help by phone or chat since we’re unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you’d like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. Our services are free, confidential, and available 24/7/365. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

If you are ever at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Safeplace (www.nationalsafeplace.org) is an organization that provides access to immediate help and supportive resources for youth in need. You can look up your city and state to see if there are any safe places near you.

Good luck & be safe,

NRS