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20 Year Old Runaway Scared To Go Back Home

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  • 20 Year Old Runaway Scared To Go Back Home

    I recently ran away from home and stayed at my boyfriend's family's house for awhile. However I'm planning on going back home soon, but I am scared. I don't know how my family's going to react or what they'll do. I'm scared my mom will hurt me or possibly kick me out. The reason why I left was because of a lot of reasons. My mom and I don't have the best relationship; we don't really speak and I always try to avoid any kind of conversation with her. I always felt like the "black sheep" in the family which I know is perfectly normal but this is I guess "different". I don't feel as if I can truly be myself in my household which is honestly sad. I always feel restricted and as if I'm supposed to be and act a certain why. Of course my mom believes in diversity, but it's almost like she wants me to be "diverse" in a certain way. I'm not saying my mom is "abusive" or "a terrible person", but she is manipulative. I'm scared to do my own thing because I'm anxious that my mom or any of my family members will judge me (which I know is sad for a 20 year old girl). I do things for my mom's own benefit throughout my whole life, and a left my home for a while so I could get away from her and everyone else.

    Anyways, it's been like over a week and I honestly do want to go back home, but I am scared of my family (especially my mom). And like I said before; I don't know how they're going to react or what they'll do. If they were to kick me out I would have very limited places to go a.k.a only my boyfriend's house. The thing is I told them that I was staying for about a week or so, I feel bad staying any longer because I feel as if I am invading their space (especially cause their house is so small). It's not that I want to cut ties with my family, it's that I don't want to live under the same roof as them. And I obviously can't just move in with my boyfriend's family, that just isn't fair to them at all.

    Also my boyfriend is currently out of state and where he is he doesn't have much access to his phone, so he doesn't know anything that going on with me at the moment.

    Anyways to sum it up, I'm a 20 year old that ran away from home, stayed at my boyfriend's family's house for a while, wants to go home but is afraid of how family will react and what they'll do.

  • #2
    Thanks for reaching out; we are glad that you did. It sounds like you left home to get a break from your family and especially your mom, but now are worried about how things will be when you return home. It sounds like your mom is manipulative and that you haven’t felt that you can be yourself because of her influence on you and the family. This must have been very stressful and hard for you growing up.
    We are glad that you were able to take a break but, with your boyfriend not at home, it is understandable that you feel awkward. It’s possible that you are more welcome there than you realize since you feel self-conscious and he is not there.
    One of the difficult parts is that, only in one state would you be considered a runaway; in the other 49 you are of- age, and if they wanted to kick you out, they could, so communicating with your mom prior to returning would certainly be of help.
    We have two ways that you can do that. One is through our Message Service. You would call us, we’d talk over your situation, and help you craft a message to open the door of communication with your mom. We deliver the message and ask if they’d like to respond. You then call us back to hear it, then we can do another round with the hope that this will lead to a Conference Call. On the Conference Call (CC), we act as your ally and advocate and help to keep the conversation fair and productive.
    The other option is to skip the message, and go straight to the CC option. You’d again, call in, and we would listen to your story and help you decide on your goal for the CC.
    We hope that you will call in to hear more about these options. You can reach us 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929 (1-800-RUNAWAY), or, you can use our live chat through With the chat, we can’t do message service or CC, but we can help you make another plan to try to feel more in control of your situation.
    We hope this helps.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)


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