im 15 and wanting to run away

[ccsmod10]

Hey there,

Thank you so much for reaching out! You are in a super difficult situation and you’re dealing with so much, that it took courage to contact us and share everything.

No one deserves to go through this, to be abused mentally and physically such as what’s happening to you – that’s not acceptable. It’s good that you feel like school is your family, but you also need a stable environment at home – no wonder you want to go stay with your grandmother.

You mentioned that you’ve been thinking about taking your life… Well, please know that your life is precious, that you have tons of potential ahead of you, and that your strength (which I can tell you have a lot inside from the way you write) will keep you going ahead. But if these thoughts come back, please call the Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-8255, and keep this number handy.

With all that you’re going through, it’s understandable that you feel confused and sad. Besides your grandmother, do you have someone else that you can talk to? It could be the school counselor, or a good friend, or another adult that you trust… It’s important to have a good support system, with people that you can count on. Please know that you can also call us anytime: we’re here 24/7 for you at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

You mentioned that CPS was called once, and that it was bad experience – probably because your dad and stepmom denied everything and maybe made things worse afterwards. But it might be good to consider reporting the situation again, to see if maybe they could arrange for you to go live with your grandmother… Now that there’s a track record, they probably would believe you much more. And to make your case stronger, you could begin take pictures and record what’s happening: if you have any bruises, make sure to document them and/or show them to someone who can be a witness. Or you can record when they speak to you in an abusive way. It’s not an easy thing to do, but it would be helpful.

Have you thought about asking your grandmother to ask your dad to allow you to go live with her, maybe just for some time to begin with? Or maybe the school counselor or one of your teachers could help you talk to your parents about “taking a break” at your grandmothers…
In the meantime, please try to stay strong and get help from calling us or from friends when things get tough!

Wishing you the best, NRS

I’m 15 I live in Phoenix Arizona, I have good grades I don’t do bad things and I am in sports. For the past 6-7 years of my life have been horrible. I am always been physically mentally and emotionally abused by my father. Mentally and emotionally abused Buy my stepmother. We recently got a house little over a year ago and now that I’m living with them it’s been horrible. I was living with my grandmother and I decided I want to live with my dad because at the time he loved cared and respected me, now he just wants to control my life talk bad to me judge me and it has gotten to the point I have ran away one Time before, a day before my birthday. I was missing for about 24 hours and when I came back home it was in a cop car, I thought things would have gotten better because they would understand the kind of pain I was in and how I’ve gotten to the point where I was trying to commit suicide. Because of them. Them. Typical story of how young teens like me try to kill themselves it’s usually because of the classes at schoo because of them. Them. Typical stories of how young teens like me try to kill themselves it’s usually because of the class bully, Failing grades, or just having a bad life in general. You never hear it’s because of your parents but that is my story. My father has choked me leaving red marks to wear his fingers tightened around my throat he’s busted my lip before he’s made my nose bleed in his on multiple accounts pushed shoved and slapped me. My step mom tries to make it better but then she gets irritated and goes off on me also. CPS has already been contacted in my household one time and I hated it I absolutely hate it. I just wanna live with my grandmother again or maybe a close friend. I want my suffering and I am so close just ending it off my hands are covered in bruises and so were the same with my legs and arms. My eyes constantly hurt from crying myself to sleep and. I hate it because I want to be there for everyone else it’s hard to be there but he could be there for you I can look at school you’re my only family they are my family I just want to leave I don’t wanna be here anymore so what can I do please I don’t know why am so confused I am so lost my father was a single man if you got together with my stepmom and had a kid but my mother lives on the opposite side of town and I don’t want to live with her because she’s already having things rough can I just go live with my grandma I hate it because I want to be there for everyone else it’s hard to be there but i couldnt be there for me. I can look at school n see my true family. my only family they are my family I just want to leave I don’t wanna be here anymore so what can I do please I don’t know why am so confused I am my father was a single man he got together with my stepmom and had a kid but my mother lives on the opposite side of town and I don’t want to live with her because she’s already having things rough can I just go live with my grandmother. I don’t know how much more I can take. I just want to kill myself but at the same time I want to keep fighting see if there’s a small chance I can get out of my house I could finally be happy so please any advice I need suggestions will help thank you...

[ccsmod10]

Hey there,

Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a bit about your situation.

From what you included in your email, you mentioned that you’re experiencing abuse at home. It’s understandable that you’re wanting to get away from that environment. Home should always be a safe place for you to be, abuse is never okay and you don’t deserve that treatment. You are always able to report the abuse that you’re going through to CPS or staff at school. You’re not alone in this, we are here to help, and there are other organizations here to help as well. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with someone you trust, as far as transferring custody.

If you feel like getting out of the house is the best option and you decide to run away, we can explain what usually happens. We’re not legal experts, but from our general knowledge, running away is not illegal. If you runaway, your parents can make a runaway report. The police don't always actively look for you, if they come across you, then they usually bring you home. If you explain to them that home isn't a safe place to be, they don't always return you right away. They're supposed to investigate it first. We offer to call out to youths local police, with youth, to find out their protocols and what happens if runaways refuse to go home. We can also help find runaway/youth shelters in your area, so you can stay safe.

We also have legal aid resources in our database. While we’re not law experts, we can try to find one in your area, there may be legal ways for you to be able to move out of your house. We’re here to try to brainstorm options with you.

We hope our response is helpful. Also, talking to school counselors and teachers about what’s going on at home could provide you with great support. You are not alone in this. You are always welcome to call into our 24/7 crisis center if you'd like to talk more about your situation.

Be safe, NRS

i am 16 and i went to ran away from my house i stay in depression like all the time i know i can not and i have to be 18 to live alone i am think of live with a carerbut i have no idea how to do that so plz help me out plus she does hit me and says was that i can not describe.

[ccsmod5]

Thank you for reaching out. It sounds like your girlfriend is in a tough spot right now and we're glad that you're able to support and advocate for her. The National Runaway Safeline is located in the United States of America (USA). Our knowledge of helpful community based resources and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. If you are located in a country outside of the USA, you can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: http://www.childhelplineinternationa...where-we-work/
We hope that by reaching out to a local resource, you are able to get the support you need from an organization that understands the laws and circumstances that affect youth in your country.

NRS

Hey my girlfriend is 15 and her parents and i recently found out that I'm depressed so won't let me see her anymore her and I started dating before I hit the age of 18 so can they still tell us not to date? Since her parents have had that chat with us i still think of her as my girlfriend we just don't get to see each other anymore since then my girlfriend has been feeling scared and unwelcome at home she feels they don't trust her because they went on her facebook and then Apperntly they got someone to hack her snapchat and wont listen to her she told them she wants to leave but they told her to stop she is really unhappy and has been trying to find ways to leave what can we do in quebec to make sure she's happy and in a place she feels welcome?

[ccsmod4]

Reply: I’m 15 and wanting to run away.

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

We hope to hear from you soon.

Be safe,
NRS

I’m 15 and wanting to run away. My mom don’t buy me food, shoes, clothes etc. all she cares about is herself. She lets the dogs ******** everywhere. Does she clean it? Not a chance. And she kicked the only person I had out. She is like a mom to me. More of a mom then my actual mother ever has been. She’s bought me anything I’ve needed. In all actuality all I want is to live with her. I’m so lost and depressed without her. Now it’s just me and my mom, we don’t get along. We fight all the time, she says stuff is gonna get better, it does, but only for a minute. Then it goes back to the way it’s always been.

[ccsmod1]

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We're sorry to hear about all that you have been going through and want you to know that you deserve to feel safe and happy in your home. We are not legal experts, but we can tell you that because you are a minor, if you leave home and your parents file a runaway report, you could be returned home. There could also be legal consequences for whomever you stay with for what is called harboring a runaway. If you want a liner to help you walk through other options like us mediating a conference call between you and your parents to help you share your feelings safely, thinking through possible adults that you could turn to or could advocate for you, or things like emancipation and legal aid numbers, don't hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

Best,

NRS

im a female, 15 and i do not want to live with my family anymore... yes i will miss them but i just cant live with them anymore... i just want to live by myself i think i act older then i am and i want to get out of the house my dad and mom mentally abouse me... and i cant take anymore yes im taking medicine for stress but it does nothing and my parents dont listen to me or trust me or anything they dont love me... i know they dont they make cry almost every night an di dont want any of it anymore....

[ccsmod1]

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We're sorry to hear about all that has been going on and want you to know that you deserve to feel safe and happy in your home. Unfortunately we are not legal experts and your ability to live with your mom would be based on the specific stipulations of your parent's joint custody agreement. Do you feel that you can talk to your mom and ask her about your custody and whether you can live with her or not? It's understandable that you would be afraid that he might fight for full custody, so do you feel like you could work with her to ask questions about what you both can do to avoid that? We could also help you have that conversation with her.

Another option would be looking into Emancipation and legal aid. If you give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 we could give you general information about the process and look up possible legal aid for you. We can also help you walk through your options and identify the people in your life that can advocate for you and get you the answers you are looking for.

Best,

NRS

im 15 years old and cant stand living with my father.

no one understands me because from everyone else point of view my dad is “perfect”. he feeds me. pays for my phone. has a roof over my head. but im just not happy here and im scared of him. my mother lives about 45 minutes away but she was a drug user for a little and went to rehab for it. therefore she still has custody of me as well as my father does. so by law i could live with either parent right? its just my dad yells alot. acusses me of stupid things.. no one sees it as a bad thing tho. alot of people just see it as a daughter and father argueing but its more then that. i sleep at my friend as long as i can bc i cant stand being home.. everytine im home my dad finds a way to pick on me some how some way. i just want to live with my mom but i feel like my dad would try to stop me by taking my mom to court for full custody and if he did that and he won id be worse because he would be more mad at me then ever. i really cant live here. no one knows that i sit here and cry every night im home bc i feel unsafe and everything. im a competition cheerleader and a good student in 10th grade and this living with my dad is making it hard to concentrate on things. cheer leading is my whole life and to be honest if i had to drop it to live with my mom i so would.. thats how bad it is... also my mothers mom is willing to take me in but my dad wouldnt let it happen but my mom would and since they both have custody of me how would that work? would i b able to move in with her? pls help me... i need this.

[ccsmod10]

Hi there,

Thanks for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. You made a great first step to finding the help that you may need. It sounds like you are going through a lot, we’re glad to hear that you have support with your friend’s parents. You deserve to be treated with respect, to experience acceptance and to feel safe.

We want you to know that your safety is so very important to us and your life has worth. It sounds like you are thinking about harming yourself or ending your life. It takes a lot of strength to reach out for help, and we are so glad that you did. If you feel this is an emergency you could consider calling 911 for emergency assistance. We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can. You do not have to face this alone, and there is so much help out there for you. If you are thinking about hurting yourself, the National Suicide Hotline could be a good resource for you. You can check them out at www.youmatter.suicidepreventionlifeline.org, or you can call 1-800-273-8255 for help and support any time. You can also call us 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) if you need to talk.

We can’t imagine how hurtful and scary it must feel to know you can’t be your true self around your parents. We are on your side and will stand up for you. We want you to know that you are strong for having gone through so much already. It is perfectly okay to deviate from what others or the common population believe to be “normal”. You’re bravery and resilience is so admirable. You are so strong for having gone through so much without having the acceptance that you do deserve for just being you. Remember that you are not alone. The GLBT National Hotline at 1888-843-4564 is another option to gain great support from those that are familiar with the issues and experiences of those that are also a part of the LGBTQ community. Regardless of how you identify, you’re still a member of the LGBT community and there is support out there for you. You can access their website link bellow to utilize all the other possibly useful resources they have to offer: http://www.glbthotline.org/
You mentioned that you were considering the options that may be best for you. By all means, if you do fear for your safety either now or in the future, do not hesitate to take the necessary steps to regain your safety. We are not legal experts here but as far as we know, it is not illegal to runaway. It would mean that your parents could file a runaway report with the police. This is usually done in an effort to try to return you home as the police are required to do so. We have legal aid resources in our database. While we’re not law experts, we can try to legal aid in your area. Those are lawyers who help youth for free and could help you find ways to live with your friend’s mom. We’re here to try to brainstorm options with you.

If you can give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY or reach out through Live Chat we can try to find some youth shelters that may be near your city and state by utilizing our database of resources. We can also try to call out to shelters with you or on your behalf to advocate for you.

Stay Strong, NRS

Hi there, I was wondering if you could give me any advice on my situation.

Im 15 and I’m transgender and my parents are transphobic, I know neither of my parents would physical harm me if I came out, but I know mental and emotional they would.
I have made a plan; pack a ba, leave a few page note to my parents coming as transgender and having my best friends mom come get me.
My best friends mom has always offered me a place to stay for a while if I need to, but I’m afraid if i do go through with this plan my parents might take legal action to get me back And my best friends mom would fight them in court.
I really don’t want to be in this place anymore, I think about killing myself because I’m so tired of these people putting me down and making me feeling like ********.

[ccsmod11]

Hi there,

Thanks for reaching out. It sounds like you're having some difficulties with your mother and a religion you don't find fulfilling. We would love to help you, just call us at 1-800-786-2929 or chat with us at 1800runaway.org

Best,
NRS