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    Hi. I just turned 17 yesterday. I live in Florida. I need to leave. My mother is mentally abusive and demeaning all of the time. She's lazy and wants me to do everything go her. I'm not talking about just normal chores, I dont mind cleaning, but she treats me like more of a slave than her daughter. I have a little brother who doesn't do ANYTHING and she doesn't care. I clean the entire house for her everyday and the one time I didn't do the laundry she yells at me, pulls my hair and threw me in the closet. Now she's disconnected the internet and threatening to disconnect my phone unless I pay for it. I can't get a job because she lost my social security card when I was 5. I've been asking to get it replaced for over a year now but she hasn't felt like it. Without it I haven't been able to work, get my permit or license (even though i took drivers ed 2 years ago), I can't even get a state ID. Without a way to pay her I won't be able to keep my phone connected. My boyfriend is joining the military and i won't see him for at least 2 years and i really need to stay in contact with him, I use internet to talk to all of my friends and now I can't. She cancelled my birthday all because of this mess. I've tried to reason with her multiple times, I've read countless books on parenting and dealing with irrational parents over the years but nothing has worked. She doesn't listen and all she cares about is herself. I don't know what to do. I wanna move out but I can't support myself enough to get emancipated and i have friends I could stay with but i can't leave without consent. I'm severely depressed all of the time and I know she's my mom by blood but after years of nothing but fighting and disrespectful remarks and actions, I can't stand her. I don't like who she is as a person and especially as a mother. I need help. I really don't want to waste another year of my life with this women in this house. Honestly people ask me how I do it and how i haven't run away. My future is important to me, I don't want to jeopardize my education or success by running away, it's the last thing I want to do, but if i stay here I might self destruct. I can't take it anymore...running away is starting to seem like the only option I have. Again, I don't want to break the law or get in trouble, but im a good kid and there should be a legal way for me to get out of this toxic environment so i can live my life. There's not one single day that we don't fight and i cry myself to sleep every night wishing that she would change...but she never has and she never will. Somebody help me..

  • #2
    RE: Help..

    Hi,
    We’re glad you reached out to us here at NRS, it sounds like your experience a really tough time with your mom. Abuse, whether it’s physical or mental, is unacceptable and you don’t deserve to be treated that way. We know it takes a lot of courage to reach out when you need help, and we’re really happy you did.
    First of all, if you’d like to report any abuse that’s happening at home, you can call us here at 1-800-RUNAWAY or file a report yourself with local police. Secondly, you mentioned you might “self-destruct” if you stay at home. If you ever find yourself having harmful or suicidal thoughts call the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK right away. That’s something to take very seriously. Finally, it’s understandable that you want to leave home. That environment sounds like it’s really harming your state of mind and effecting your personal life. It’s smart to want to get a job to be able to support yourself and build toward an independent future. If your mom is not helping your obtain your social security card, you could try calling the social security hotline yourself. Their phone number is 1-800-772-1213. You will need your birth certificate and might need your mom’s authorization, but calling will hopefully get the ball rolling.
    We want to commend you for doing your research (like reading those books and doing things legally so you stay out of trouble) and asking the right questions. We know it can be very frustrating to be 17 and unable to leave your mom’s house without her permission. If you were to file an abuse report, you might be taken from her house, and entered into foster care. Seeking out emancipation is an option, but would require money and legal help. Another option could be talking to your mom about staying with a family member or close friend that lives nearby. That could give you both the space you need to get into a healthier state of mind. If your mom is unaccepting of that idea, we do offer a mediated conference call at NRS. Your mom, yourself and one of our liners could get on the phone together to help diffuse any heated situation that arises.
    As we said, we’re glad you contacted us and we encourage you to continue gathering information to help you get through this in a safe way. If you need any resources for your area or want to talk to someone about your plan of action, please give us a call here at 1-800-RUNAWAY. Best of luck!
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

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