I'm 14 and I need to get out of my house.

I’m 14 and I want to leave home. My mother recently found out i’m gay and have a girlfriend and my dad won’t even speak of it to me. she won’t let me hang out with my girlfriend and has threatened to move so I won’t see her. She acts like she loves me in front of my friends and their parents but once we get home, she acts like she hates my girlfriend and makes me feel bad about it. I know my girlfriends family would take me in but I just want a way for my mom to kick me out because she won’t let me leave. help

[ccsmod9]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS feels they would be able to best help through those means. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe, NRS

Hi I'm 15 and recently I got in trouble for smoking and I got in big trouble for it and I've been grounded for 2 almost 3 months and my dad was obviously mad but he was so mean about it hit me three times , and told me that I ruined everything and I ruined the house and that I'm a peice of crap and now I can't see my mom anymore and I miss her so much and I want to live with my mom but she's gotten in trouble with law and my dad would use that against her in court . I don't know what to do I just want to leave this house , I have money and people I can stay with . And he isn't my real dad he's my step dad but I want to leave so bad .

[ccsmod4]

Reply: I’m 14, I don’t want to live with my parents anymore


Hello,
Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
You don’t deserve to be abused by your father. It must be a terrible feeling not knowing if you are safe.
It is not your fault that he does this. Sometimes it helps to have the support of someone. Perhaps talking this over with your mom might be an option in coming up with a plan to change things.
There are laws to protect you from child abuse. It may take a lot of courage to do so but you have the option of filing an abuse report with child protective services in your state.
To do so contact Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453
www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.

Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We are limited as to how we can help in this type of forum.

If you would like to talk more in detail please call 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in.

If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to contact 9-1-1 or seek emergency assistance immediately.


Be safe,
NRS

We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us

I’m 14, I don’t want to live with my parents anymore, my dad has gripped me by the throut before up against the wall, he smokes weed all the time and is way to strict, they call me names and I don’t think I can live in this house anymore I have thought about it all last night but I would rather live in care, I would miss my mam but right now I really don’t want to live in this house

[ccsmod2]

Hello There,
Thank you for contacting The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It seems like you are going through a frustrating time right now. We are not legal experts, but in most states the legal age to leave home is 18 years old. Because you are 14 you could be considered as a runaway youth. If the police were to find you they would most likely bring you back home. You could consider asking your parents for permission to go to a friend’s house. We hope this information was helpful in your situation. If you have any other questions please feel free to give us a call we are available 24/7. We wish you the best of luck!
NRS

im 14 and need to get out of ky house. Ive been locked up and javent been able to do anything. Can i still leave whether my parents said no?

[ccsmod5]

Hi,
Thank you for reaching out. It can be really difficult when your parents are not supportive of your identity. You deserve to be loved and supported because you’re perfect just the way you are. You mention you’re concerned about a boy telling your mom and dad about holding your girlfriend’s hand in class. One option is to talk to your classmate about the situation at home (namely, that you believe you’ll be kicked out if they found out). Hopefully he will understand and want to help you out. It’s not okay for him to “out” you in any case; that is a decision that should be yours and yours alone. Another option is to talk to your dad about how you’ve been feeling away from your mom. It could be great to have someone in your corner to stand up for you. If you need help talking to your dad about the situation, you might consider asking your school guidance counselor, a therapist, or even another family member. Here at NRS, we do offer conflict mediation by phone and we would be happy to help you broach that conversation. We understand if that doesn’t feel like an option.
We hope that your parents do not kick you out, but if that becomes a reality there are options. The first is calling your local police or child protective services. Since you are a minor, your parents cannot simply kick you out. They are obligated to care for you until you are a legal adult. Another option might be to stay with a friend or another family member. If you give us a call, we may be able to locate runaway/youth shelters nearby. Our number 1-800-786-2929.
Finally, we want to remind you that you are not alone. There are so many people out there who will love and support you like you deserve, even if those people are not your parents. You can also always call the wonderful LGBTQ resources available to you:

LGBT National Hotline: 1-888-843-4564

LGBT National Youth Talkline: 1-800-246-7743

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

And of course we are here 24/7 to listen and support you in whatever way we can. Take care of yourself and stay strong!

Hi ,
I'm fourteen and I like other girls . My parents are really strict christians and if my mom finds out she'll kick me out . My dad might stand up for me , but I doubt it . I have a girlfriend and until I met her liking girls didn't feel real . But a boy who knows my parents saw us holding hands in class today and i'm scared he might tell my mom and dad . I'm just scared and I don't know what to do .

[ccsmod9]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as we feel it might help us to gather some more information to help out. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS

My family and I never get along I never feel welcome in my own home and me and my family fight a lot and I just want to leave

[ccsmod5]

Hi,
Thank you for sharing some of your story. It can be really painful when your parents make you feel like you’re a terrible person for making a mistake. You’re young and you will make plenty of mistakes; you deserve to have your parents support you as you learn, not tear you down. You mention that your depression has gotten worse lately, which is understandable given the situation. You also write that, “I need to get away from everyone here and my life here.” We’re uncertain what this means, but please know that your well-being is so important. If you think you might be in danger of hurting yourself, we encourage you to reach out to 9-1-1 or the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-786-2929. You are not alone and while things may feel overwhelming right now, we promise it will not always feel this way.
You mention that you want to prove to your parents that you’re “not such a terrible person.” We want you to know that, whatever it is you did, you are not a terrible person. You clearly care very much about how others feel and you sound like a very kind young person. We encourage you to talk with your parents about how you’ve been feeling depressed. If they aren’t open to hearing it, you can always talk to another adult you trust, like a teacher or a guidance counselor. And of course, you’re always welcome to call us at 1-800-786-2929. We’re here to listen and help any way we can.
Finally, it sounds like you haven’t been able to interact with your friends lately. That can definitely make it difficult to cope with stress, but we encourage you to look for other ways to keep yourself in a good place. That could be reading, writing, drawing, meditating…anything that you like to do (or that you usually like to do when you’re feeling more like yourself).
Please don’t hesitate to reach out to us by phone if you ever need someone to listen or connect you with resources. In addition, we can also help you talk to one of your parents on conference call if you need extra support. Stay strong!
NRS

I'm 14, and I made a huge mistake that ruined the relationship i have with my parents. I want to prove to them that I'm not such a terrible person, but they're acting like I'll never be the person they thought I was, and they're disappointed beyond words. On top of that, my depression has gotten worse lately, and I've lost interest in nearly everything. I don't think I can take it all anymore. My friends can't be there for me, because my parents took away my phone permanently. I can't go to any social activities, or interact with anyone. Everyone is happy, and I'm living with this terrible mistake that keeps digging me into a deeper hole. I need to get away from everyone here and my life here.

[ccsmod3]

Hello there,
Thanks for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline and being open about what’s going on. It sounds like you are in a lot of pain and would like to move to a safe, peaceful environment. It’s understandable you would want to avoid arguing and yelling with family. You’ve clearly tried many things to ease the pain of your situation.
As you are a minor, if you are considering leaving home, you could be required to return if your mother files a runaway report. We don’t give specific legal advice, so we can’t say specifically what would happen if you were to leave home and live with your grandparents. However, to discuss this in more detail, you can call us at 1-800-786-2929.
If it’s possible for your mother and step-father to agree to allow your grandparents to take custody, that would ease the situation. If you feel unsafe, you also have the option of filing an abuse report. You could possibly be moved to your grandparents’ custody, however this would probably require court involvement, and again we can’t say for sure. You mentioned you feel depressed and are having suicidal thoughts. A possible resource that could be helpful is the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, at 1-800-273-8255.
We can discuss your situation in greater detail if you call us at 1-800-786-2929. Feel free to call or chat with us. We are available 24/7. We can get a better understanding of your situation and discuss some other possible options. Again thanks for reaching out to us.
Best,
NRS

Hi I am 14 and have been living with my mom and step father since I was 11 up until I was 11 I lived with my grandparents and my mother who was not married at the time. My mom then got married and my step father had made my life miserable for the next three years I was living with him. It finally died down and now I have began arguing with my mom and not getting along with her at all. My mom has 3 kids me and then my twin brothers. She is always a nervous wreck and always is stressed out. I feel she takes everything out on me. And I feel that I get verbally abused and am yelled at for unreasonable reasons. I don’t appreciate how my mother talks to me and I have taken disrespect out on her and have had a bad attitude towards her because of how I get treated. I’m tired of living with her and my step father. I don’t feel welcomed here and I don’t feel apart of the family I want to move back with my grandparents but I don’t know how I can do that without getting court involved. I have had the cops involved once before and I have ran away multiple times. I don’t want to live here and I feel that if I don’t like where I am living or feel comfortable I shouldn’t have to live here. I am constantly crying and screaming at the top of my lungs and I’m just tired of it. My grandparents try to help me out as much as possible but once I have to go back home I get very depressed. There are many times suicidal thoughts go through my head because I am so fed up. Please help and give any advice you can to help me get out of this situation and possibly be able to move in with my grandparents.