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  • i ran away?

    Hi, believe it or not, I've ran away for 6 months. I left home around Feb, and did not return ever since. I'm 14 and currently staying with my friends, and I would like to know whats the worst that could happen to me? I haven't gone home yet because my other friend told me my mom called her and said that she will send me to foster care. I miss my family alot now, and I really want to go home and apologize..And to make it worst, those 6 months I didn't go to school. I stayed here at my friends house (shes a dropout by the way). So yeah..whats the worst that can happen?

  • #2
    Re: i ran away?

    Hi. Thanks for reaching out to us. It sounds like you're ready to go back home after being on the run for 6 months. What do you think going home will be like? From what you wrote, it sounds like you're scared of what the possible consequences might be. What would you like to see happened if you go home? Have you been able to keep in contact with your mom since you've been gone? Do you think it's possible she was just telling your friend you'll go to foster care to scare you? You asked what the worst that could happen is. Every area is going to handle runaway situations a little different, so there's no sure answer. However, what generally happens if a runaway is caught is they are returned to their legal guardians (in your case your mom). Is this the first time you ran away? Have you been in any other trouble? Generally, youth do not go to juvenile detention or get sent to other places just for running away. As far as foster care goes, this is not usually a place that youth get sent for running away. With that said, we can't say for sure what could or couldn't happen.

    Do you think it would help to talk to your mom before going home? One of the services we provide here is called conference calling. How it works is you would call us talk to one of our liners (the person that answers the phone) about your situation. We're a completely confidential hotline so we wouldn't trace your call or know where you were calling from unless you told us. Then if you chose, we could call your mom and let her know that you wanted to talk to her about something. During the conference call it would be you, your mom and the liner from NRS. Our part in the call is to help facilitate the conversation, make sure that both you and your mom get to talk and be listened to, and ensure that the conversation stays constructive (we don't allow cursing, yelling, blaming, interrupting, etc during the call). If at anytime in the call you need to take a break from talking (to cool down, etc), we can separate the two of you. Since we're confidential your mom wouldn't be able to know where you are unless you're ready to tell her. Many times it helps to have someone talk to your parents with you, especially if it's something that you're nervous to talk about. Ultimately, of course, the decision is up to you if you want to try a conference call.

    Even if you're not quite ready to do a conference call, you can call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY anytime day or night. Someone is always available to talk to you, help you come up with options and the possible outcomes of each option. We aren't here to tell you what to do, and we aren't going to judge your situation. We're merely here to listen and help you come up with a plan that you're comfortable with. Call anytime. Someone will be here.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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    • #3
      Re: i ran away?

      This is NOT the first time I've ran away, But when it was my first time running away, which was last year, my dad caught me, and the cops came to my friends house. I didnt really get in trouble, but the police gave me warning, and said if I ran away again I could be in MUCH MORE trouble. And I know my mom called the cops on me to file me as a run away cause around an area where I'm usually at, the police were driving around and my friends were there and the cops asked if they knew me. And the police also searched my other best friends house, cause my mom was suspicious of her. So yeah..what if I go home, will my friends get in trouble for keeping me in? My friends just didnt want me out in the streets cause my neighborhood is pretty dangerous.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: i ran away?

        Hello,

        Thank you for contacting us again at the National Runaway Switchboard. We hear you on the fact that you had to run away more than once and must have had your reasons why you felt it necessary to keep running. The laws for runaways vary from state to state and while we are not in a position to interpret the laws; it is likely that some police officers could roam from home to home if that is what they are willing to do. It is probably a matter of living in a small town or city and whether the cops have the time to send out an officer to search for you. The cops must have had a hunch as to why they felt it necessary to follow up with a search for you and it is likely that you could receive another warning from the police if you are found. Unless you engage in risky behavior or find yourself doing something wrong like stealing for example and the police were called to the scene, the police would only take you in to custody and could hold you for some time for that charge but if you did not do anything wrong the police have to take you back to your legal guardian. Is it possible that the last time you ran away that the cops were only trying to scare you so that you would not keep running in the future? What do you think is going to prevent you from running in the future?

        Have you considered sitting down with your parents to talk with them about what is going to make you feel more confortable at home to stop running? Are there any compromise that they or you are willing to make to help you stop running? Your parents do have the rights to file a run away report on you since you are a minor. It helps to verify your status if you are picked up by the cops and it helps to secure your parents from being charge with neglect if you got hurt when on the run. However, you do deserve to feel that going home is the best option for you and that you are safe there. Are you very safe where you are right now? One thing to truly consider is that your parents also have the right to file charges against the individuals that helped provide a shelter for you while you were on the run. This action brought against this certain individual is called "harboring a runaway" but it depends on the mindset of your parents and whether or not they want to pursue such an action. Your friend is to be commended for trying to help you because the streets is no place for anyone to be but it is best to let your friend know what he or she is risking. You mentioned that it was dangerous on the streets? How are you protecting yourself and are you always staying safe? What are your expectations for what life is going to be like when you go home? What was your expectation for what running away was going to be like? How are you surviving for money and food? How soon are you looking to return home and what do you plan to do with regards to ammending things with your parents? It sounds like a lot to have to consider at this point. However, you have the option of calling us at 1800Runaway if you need help with formulating a plan for what to do so with regards to reaching out to your parents. It is best to maximize your efforts if you choose to utilize our resources here. We have a message service here and the way it works it that once you call and leave a message with us we are required to deliver that message to any parent you choose to let them know that you are safe. However, if you gave us information for your parents, we are required by law to ask if there was ever abuse in the home. The law states that as mandated reporters we have to report it if you said that there was abuse. If this is not the best thing for you it is okay to consider the option of the conference call. We are able to mediate a conflict with you and your parents. We are here 24 hours a day if you want to reach out. Good luck and we look forward to hear from you.

        Sincerely,

        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment

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