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13 years old and want to move out

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  • #46
    can i move out into my friends house without my mom and dad reason and have her mom ask them for me. please reply .

    Comment


    • ccsmod1
      ccsmod1 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hey there,

      Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. We aren’t legal experts here at NRS, but generally speaking, if you are a minor and do opt to leave your home your parents can file a runaway report, which is essentially a missing person report. Running away is a status offense; this means that it isn’t illegal, but it’s something you can’t do while still a minor. If a runaway report is filed and you are located by the authorities you will most likely be returned home. It’s great to hear that your friend's parents are so supportive! If you go to stay at their house without prior permission from your parents, they could be charged with harboring a runaway, which is a misdemeanor. Penalties for harboring a runaway vary from state to state, police officer to officer, and how your parents view the situation.

      If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

      Stay safe,
      NRS

  • #47
    Im 12 and next year I'll 13 but I really want to move out of my house. I cant stand my mom. She always threatens my dog and says that she doesnt care if she kills him. Or if he stays crippled. She also threatens me when she brings the subject up. She says that shes basically gonna torchure me and that I cant cry or she'll go even harder on me. She says that I should be thankfull that she hasnt done any of that. And its even worse because my dads not here. Im just trying to do my best. Sometimes she even leaves me home alone all day and I have to do all of the house chores. And, if I miss one she will yell at me. And when i start to tear up she threatens to hit me. All i want is peace.

    Comment


    • ccsmod6
      ccsmod6 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. Your mom should not be speaking to you so hurtfully and so threateningly. It must be really difficult to get by in an environment where you don’t feel safe at all. You do not deserve to be treated the way your mom is treating you. If you feel like she is being abusive, it might be worth it to talk to the National Child Abuse Hotline and ask them about reporting. They are reachable at 1-800-422-4453 and you can ask them about the reporting process and what could happen. If there is an adult that you can trust, like a teacher or counselor, it might be a good idea to try talking to them about what is going on and they may be able to help you. Additionally, you can always give us a call 24/7 on our hotline at 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org if you want to see what other options there are for you.

      Best,
      NRS

  • #48
    I wanna move out I’m 12. I have ran away once but she fought me the same day. I am tired of my mom. She constantly yells at me for no reason.

    Comment


    • ccsmod2
      ccsmod2 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello There,
      Thank you so much for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It seems like you are going through a difficult time right now.
      We are not legal experts but have some knowledge on running away. If you were to leave home without permission your legal guardian does have the right to file a runaway report. If the police do find you they most likely would bring you home. One option to consider is to talk with your school counselor about what is going on. Sometimes talking to someone about what’s going can be helpful and they may be able to provide you with resources. Another option would be to talk with your mother about how you feel and what has been going on.
      We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and provide support to you. We wish you the best of luck!
      NRS

  • #49
    I am 13 and am wondering if I can move out if I get permission from my parents?

    Comment


    • ccsmod13
      ccsmod13 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thanks for reaching out to NRS. This is a great question to ask. Generally speaking, until you reach the age of majority (18 in most states) your parents have the legal right to decide where you live. If your parents give you permission to live somewhere that is safe and supportive then you can leave home. Although they can take back this permission at any time. If you leave home without permission from your parents then they can report you as a runaway. Running away is not illegal, but the police would likely return you home.

      We want to be here as a support for you while you figure out your next steps. Our hotline is available 24/7 to help and be a listening ear. You can reach out again at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at 1800runaway.org if you want to talk more about your situation.

      Be safe,
      NRS

  • #50
    Hi I’m a 13 year old girl and want to move in with my friend who’s parents agree with it and my mother said I can leave what’s the legal part of this

    Comment


    • ccsmod4
      ccsmod4 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello,
      Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

      We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. Keep in mind that we are not legal experts but one option in general you might want to consider is asking you mother to sign a transfer of custody and guardianship document stating you have her permission to live with your friend’s parent’s. Again we are not legal experts but we can assist you in locating these types of services in your area.

      We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
      We hope to hear from you soon.

      Take care,
      NRS

  • #51
    to start off my dad went in and out of rehab (for alcohol) and my parents got a divorce. My mom has actually gone insane. She yells and I babysit them more then she watches them. she is psycho. She hates my aunt and my grandma and my cousins (my actual best friends) my dad is only nice to her cause he still wants to be able to see my siblings. my dad will be going back to jail soon for his DUI and he got into a BIG car accident while drunk driving in a rental car. so i wouldnt be able to stay with him at all. Through all this, my mom won't let my dad in the house and she claims that she's the good guy in all of this. I'll ask her for something small and she'll go get her nails done and stuff. I literally hate her. if I ask her a question she will straight up lie to me and then accuse my cousins of "filling my head with lies" when we all know that she is lying to everyone and then blaming it on other people. if anyone ever tries to talk to her she will try to make people feel bad for her and she just uses all of this pity and she does this all. the. time. for example my 10,000 braces were FREE and our new porch, FREE. i actually hate her and i have no feelings of love twards her. I feel like i should just kill myself so i don't have to deal with this anymore. i also have 2 friends who wouldn't mind me staying with them and my closely knows them both. advice?

    Comment


    • ccsmod1
      ccsmod1 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hey there,

      Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. You mentioned that you feel like you'd rather kill yourself than deal with her. We care a lot about your safety, and we can help you find resources that can help you cope with these feelings. You do not have to face this alone, and there is so much help out there for you. If you are thinking about hurting yourself, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline could be a good resource for you. You can check them out at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/, or you can call 1-800-273-8255 for help and support any time.

      It's great to hear that your dad was able to find help for his issues with alcohol. If you’d like to talk to other young people who are dealing with friends or family members who have drinking problems you can check out Alateen. You can find more information about this support group, or find a local meeting here: https://al-anon.org/newcomers/teen-corner-alateen/.

      It sounds like maybe your mom isn't understanding how her actions are affecting you. It could be a good idea to work with a local family counselor or have a conversation mediated by a school counselor/social worker, trusted friend, or family member to help clear the air. If you'd like, you can also call us directly and we can conduct a conference call with your mom so you have a safe environment where you can express yourself.

      If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

      Stay safe,
      NRS

  • #52
    im 13
    Im not feeling very safe at home, and I told my parents about it and they think I'm over exaggerating. It started with the lies, and now the yelling, and them saying im a idiot and crazy. and saying they want send me away. I said if they don't help me I will talk to the concealers at my school. and my mom said that if I do she will lie and just say im crazy and need help and don't know what im talking abt. I have been suicidle for abt 5 months not and I started cutting myself and am on the last straw. I really don't wanna stay at home. My parents are not very physically abusive. just rly verbally. please help me.

    Comment


    • ccsmod10
      ccsmod10 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned harming yourself and suicide. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is also a great resource if you ever need to talk to someone about how you are feeling or if any thoughts of suicide some back.You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.

      Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.

      If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best

      We hope to hear from you soon.
      Be safe,
      NRS

  • #53
    My dad is too overprotective and won't let me out of his sight for 5 minutes! He plans on sending me to the Yes home and my friend said I could live with her, what am I supposed to do?????

    Comment


    • ccsmod2
      ccsmod2 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello There,
      Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It can be frustrating to not feel like you have any freedom at all.
      We are not legal experts but as a minor if you were to leave without permission your legal guardian could file a runaway report. If the police did find you they most likely would bring you home.
      One option to consider would be to talk with a school counselor about what has been going on at home. Sometimes talking to a professional can help you feel better and they may be able to see what options you have.
      If you would like to share more about your situation please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support to you. Best of luck!
      NRS

  • #54
    Hello, I'm a thirteen-year-old and I live with twelve other people (who all have intense anger issues) in a two-bedroom trailer. I am overwhelmed with schoolwork and personal responsibilities such as cooking, babysitting, and cleaning. I have to watch over my cousins and brother as well with my sick father, only my mother, my aunt, and I know what to do when he has a seizure. No matter where you are in the house, you can hear yelling, yelling, fighting, yelling, and more fighting, it's so stressful. Our house itself is a handful, there are holes in the floor, black mold everywhere, and there is no electricity in my bedroom. (Me having hypothermia is becoming so alarmingly normal now) I don't necessarily want to run away, just to move away from all of this. I already have spoken to a close friend of mine who always have wanted me to move in. Though, my mother doesn't wish to give consent to give my friend's mother for temporary guardianship. I don't know if I should be saying this here or somewhere else, I just typed in "Can I move out at age thirteen?" and this popped up. :/

    Sincerely,
    An overwhelmed teenager
    Last edited by ccsmod0; 01-27-2020, 01:10 AM.

    Comment


    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      You mentioned wanting to know how you can leave home before turning 18. The easiest way to leave home is with your guardian's permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your mom. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

      Please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

      Be safe,

      NRS

  • #55
    Hi, not sure if im doing this correctly but....oh well.
    But hi
    hey
    howdy.
    im 13, turning 14 in a few months, and i want to leave home. I have many friends supporting me, and are telling me it'd be okay if i can stay at their home.
    So i'm a 13 year old ftm (female-to-male) bisexual person. And i told my parents that a while ago. They were yelling at me, screaming i needed a preist and an exorcist. Signed me up for therapy in February without my permission, but im glad they did too. I was just wondering if it were possible i could move out of my house without their consent? Like, forcefully move out. I really hate it here, and im not sure if i sould like an attention seeker. Is theres any way i could move out and in with my best friend?
    please help...

    thanks.

    Comment


    • #56
      Hello!
      Thank you for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline! You should not be treated the way you are being treated at home! You deserve to be supported and cared for. In regards to your parents not accepting you, you can always reach out to LGBT National Hotline at 1888-843-4564 or LGBT National Youth Talkline at 1800-246-7743. They both can provide you great support and answer any questions you may have.
      You mention wanting to move out. Because you would still be a minor you would need your parents’ permission to live elsewhere besides your home. If you were to leave it would technically not be illegal, but whomever you stay with could potentially be charged with harboring a runaway. We can discuss this in more detail if you call us at 1800-786-2929 or chat with us via our live chat at www.1800runaway.org. We can try to answer any questions you may have, be a listening ear, and provide resources for you! Our hotline is 24/7 and confidential!
      Stay safe!
      National Runaway Safeline
      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

      National Runaway Safeline
      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

      Comment


      • #57
        Hi I am XXX my mom yells at me too much and it is putting a lot of stress on me and my dad works too much during the day and I am always stuck at home with my mom and she is always screaming and yelling at me so I wanted to move into my boyfriends house because if feel safe there and nobody there yells or screams, but it would mean that I would have to change schools and get used to being in a new school and not knowing people that I dont know and I dont feel safe at home anymore
        Last edited by ccsmod0; 02-10-2020, 12:14 AM.

        Comment


        • ccsmod0
          ccsmod0 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hey there,

          You mentioned wanting to know how you can leave home before turning 18. The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your mom and dad. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

          Please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

          Be safe,

          NRS

          We hope this response was helpful! We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

      • #58
        I’m 13 and want to move out
        I have a disabled brother that is abusive (sexually: he looks at me and my mom creepily and he had an orgasm right in front of my mom)I have issues with authority and just want to live my life, but my dad wants me to be this tough girl that is basically him but a girl, what he never was (he was physically abused) and my brother also hit me and my parents once, and I just want control, but all the adults want me to be a kid and enjoy but I’m forced to do chores, for my phone service for a phone that I bought with my own money, and I just feel trapped, I’m way more mature and smarter than my peers, but I still struggle because I’m just so stressed, i just want a breather, a break from reality, weekends I’m still expected to do more chores, and I have my mom who has 50 cents to her name and is disabled, and my controlling dad, he does pay for everything but I just hate the limits! I can’t do this anymore! -Sydney

        Comment


        • ccsmod4
          ccsmod4 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello,
          Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

          We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like there are several issues happening within the family that has you feeling stressed out and looking for some relief. Quite often when faced with difficulties it may become an option to reach out for help through counseling services.
          Having a place to vent may help to talk and come up with a plan that will help you to cope with your situation. Things might begin to change if communication improves. You deserve to have your feelings not only heard but acknowledged.
          We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

          Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
          If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to or seek emergency assistance immediately.
          We hope to hear from you soon.

          Take care,
          NRS

      • #59
        I wish I could move out so bad

        Comment


        • ccsmod13
          ccsmod13 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hey there,

          Thanks for taking the time to write us here at NRS. A lot of young people reach out to us who share a similar feeling of wanting to leave home for a variety of reasons. Home can often become stressful and it is not easy to cope with if you feel like you are not getting the support that you need. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you with figuring out your next steps in this difficult situation. Asking for help was really responsible and smart of you.

          The easiest way to leave home as a minor is with your parents’ permission. In this case, they would be allowing you to live somewhere else where you are safe and being cared for. A helpful step is to start reaching out to friends and family members you might be able to stay with. Sometimes having an adult advocate on your side can make communicating your needs more effective to your parents. Perhaps an adult family member, a friend's parent or a counselor at school can talk to your parents with you about your experience at home and the possibility of you leaving.

          We truly want to be a support for you as you decide on your next steps. We are available 24/7 to listen and help as much as possible. Please do not hesitate to reach out again by phone or chat if you would like to talk more in-depth about your situation and explore your options. You can contact us by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org.

      • #60
        hi um my parents don't care about and and i really want to move because i saw an apartment that i have a money for but it it legal for 13 year old secretly sneak out the house and live by them self

        Comment


        • ccsmod15
          ccsmod15 commented
          Editing a comment
          Well, it's not so much illegal to sneak out of the house as it is a status offense -- sort of like breaking curfew. That means when the police find you they would bring you back home. If you'd like to talk about what's going on that makes you want to leave home we are here to talk. You can call us anytime at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat with us via the portal at www.1800runaway.org. We are confidential and can help you figure out what you'd like to do.

          We hope to hear from you soon. Stay safe!
          NRS
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