Will my friends parents get in trouble if I run away to her house?

[ccsmod3]

Hi thank you for reaching out. It sounds like you are wanting to run away because you are being abused by your dad and step mom. You do not deserve to be treated in this way. It also sounds like your mom is not around which is frustrating. So if you do not have your parents permission to go stay at a friend’s, their family could get in trouble for what’s called harboring a runaway, though the penalty for that can vary. If you would like to talk more about what’s going on or some possible options, please either call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS

Hello, I am 12 years old and I’m thinking about running away from home and going to a friends house for a week or too because my mom is not around and I’m a slave at my dads house he mentally abuses me and my step mom abuses me too and now I don’t feel safe at home

[ccsmod11]

(If you are in danger for any reason, please call the police or go to your local emergency room.)

Hi there,
Thanks so much for reaching out to us. It sounds like there is a lot going on at home with your mom, especially since she made you quit your job. We're so sorry to hear this is happening and we are on your side as you attempt to get through your situation.

To answer your question, since you're 22 you are legally an adult everywhere in the United States and you generally go and do whatever you like without your mom's permission, including working where you want and living where you want. If you are interested in setting up a plan to leave, we are more than happy to help talk you through things. There may be some Transitional Living Programs (TLPs) around York we can help you find if you need assistance with housing. These are apartment-style facilities that help young people get back on their feet. You might also look at Pennsylvania's housing assistance website (https://www.dhs.pa.gov/Services/Assi...Resources.aspx) for more information if you need assistance with housing. You might also call 2-1-1 to look for additional resources as you plan to leave home.

We would love to hear more about your story and give you more personalized guidance. The NRS is here 24/7 via online chat or by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We hope to hear from you soon! Best of luck!
NRS

I’m 22 and I have a disability but my mom is making me not have a job she made me quit McDonald’s and I really love that job and I want to runaway from home to start a new life at York pa am I allowed to start life

[ccsmod7]

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out to us at NRS. It takes a lot of strength to speak to someone about the issues you are currently facing.

We are so sorry to hear about the things you are facing at home. No one deserves to be treated the way you have described. It sounds like you are dealing with several different issues. One option to explore would be The National Child Helpline. Live chat can be accessed at www.childhelphotline.org and there is a 24/7 hotline available at 1-800-422-4453. Though these are excellent resources, you mentioned you are worried it may escalate to physical abuse. It is important to know that if there is a risk of danger you should call 911. You also mentioned that you have been having trouble with eating and body image. These are really difficult things to deal with and we at NRS want to thank you again for sharing this with us. It is very hard to not have anyone in your life to speak with about these things. Maybe your friend who is moving could be an option to speak with? You mentioned they are moving away shortly, but would it be possible to remain in contact possibly over text or calling? If you don't feel comfortable speaking with them, there is another resource, National Eating Disorders Association which can be reached at 1-800-422-4453 or accessed online at https://www.nationaleatingdisorders....ntact-helpline. They may be a good option to discuss your trouble with eating and body image if there is no one you feel comfortable discussing it with.

In addition to the resources provided, we at NRS are available via chat and our hotline 24/7.We can be reached at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or at www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) We are unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you do feel you are at risk or in danger, it is important to call 911.

We hope to hear from you soon.

Be safe,
NRS

I’m 12 years old and my mother is emotionally abusive. She always tells me how much of a disappointment I will be when I’m older and how I’m a narcissist and manipulative and lazy. I think I have ADHD and autism and my mother knows that too an does not do anything I want run away because I’m scared it will escalate to physical abuse. I’m also having trouble with eating and my body image and I don’t think I can tell anyone because I don’t have a trustworthy friends, siblings, or just other adults. My friend is moving to colarado and I want to go with her. I know the idea is stupid but I don’t know any other way to get out of this situation

[ccsmod3]

Hi, thank you for reaching out. It sounds like you are wanting to get out of your house and that is understandable given how you have been treated. It sounds like they have been treating you poorly because of things related to your brother and not even things about you. It seems like they have also not allowed you to be a normal teenager which is understandable to want. It sounds like you have a friend who has allowed you to come stay with them and their family. Unfortunately, they can get in trouble for what’s called harboring a runaway, though the punishment for that can vary by state. Also you had asked if the school can make you go back home. So what can happen if your parents were to file a runaway report, is they could notify the police and either police or your parents could show up to bring you back home. If you would like to talk more about this or some other possible options, please either call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS

Im 15 and turning 16 in august, its almost the end of the school year and I am planing to run away. My main question is if I got to school next year while not living with my parents, can the school legally make me go home/turn me into my parents/cops?

I cant stand living with my parents anymore, I dread going home after school every day and ive already been informed by my mother that im not going to be allowed to contact anyone or leave the house this summer. Ive stayed in my home because life with them was bearable while doing school and I had no where to go but the though of spending an entire summer alone in a house with them all day every day makes me feel like im going to die. The reasons I have for wanting to run away are because the rules they have are unfair and completely insane (example: im not allowed to leave my room after 8 pm and can only leave my room after 6 am for school, this rule was put into place because of my brother, I haven't done anything to give them a reason to do this. Im also not allowed to eat anything without permission, again this rule exsist because of my brother) I am constantly being yelled/screamed at/ scolded for every little thing (I get yelled at for not doing things I was never asked to do and I get yelled at for not doing stuff fast enough) I am never allowed to do anything a normal teenager is allowed to do like stay after school for clubs or go out with my friends, I cant call or text anyone (they say that I can as long as Im passing all my classes, have no missing assignments, and have done all my chores, but they always find some reason to not let me do things). My parents have also threatened to hit me for a number of reasons (being called alex at school, im trans. giving "attitude" or having a "look" on my face) my dad has hit my brother for coming home 4 hours late. I am a middle child and my older brother is the favorite while my little brother is a "problem child" and is violent, lies, and steals. my older brother is 19 and my little brother is 9 months younger than me. I get compared to my little brother when I do one little thing wrong and I never get treated like my older brother did. most of my life I tried to make life easier for my parents because they had to deal with my brother (I didn't go to club in middle school, I never asked for extra stuff, I never went to friends houses. basically if I couldn't do it on my own it didn't happen). My parents used to fight all the time and got into screaming matches with each other. I am genuinely afraid for my safety, Im depressed and anxious all the time, I feel like im walking on eggshells all the time at home. I have a friend who offered to take me in and said that there grand parents would be completely fine with it, I dont want them to get in trouble but I cant stay in my home anymore.

[ccsmod9]

Hey thanks for reaching out to us!

We’re so sorry to hear that you've had to live in an environment like that. Every situation is pretty unique so while we can offer some advice off the information you gave us just now, it would be really great if you could call our number or chat with us online so we can get the full picture.

Okay, to address your overall question, we are not legal experts but we can try to give you some general information. So, with emancipation, there is no way that you will be able to emancipate yourself without your mom knowing. To be emancipated, you need to be at least 16 years old and your mom would either need to sign off her approval or you would have to go to court to prove that you are able to live on your own.

If you still choose to leave without your mom knowing, you could be considered a runaway. Running away is not illegal, but instead known as a status offense. This just means that if you run away, your mom can file a missing persons and/or runaway report on you. If she does, this just means that the police will be looking for you and may bring you back home if you are found. In addition to this, some states have laws that make harboring a runaway a crime, so your friend’s parents could possibly be charged if your mom decides to press charges.

However, it sounds like you are dealing with extreme abuse in your home. One option is to try and contact Child Protective Services to file a child abuse report. If you are interested in this path, we can even help you fill a report out as well. Although we cannot promise the result of the report, Child Protective Services may review your case and potentially investigate. You could then be removed from your home. We can also discuss alternative options if you are able to call or chat us.

You don’t deserve to be in that much pain. We want you to know that we are here to support you as much as we possibly can; however, we can best do this by having a more in depth conversation with you either via our hotline (1800RUNAWAY (786-2929)) or by chatting online through 1800runaway.org.

We hope to hear from you soon and we hope everything works out.

Stay Safe,

NRS

can I emancipate myself without my mom knowing and live with my friend is she said she wants to kill me and hits me because I was hiding a phone from her to talk to my friends. this has happened 4 times and I've been beaten up multiple times to the point where my whole body aches or I cant move a part of my body because my bruises are swollen. I need advice. if I run away with my friend because of this and what if my mom wants to press charges against my friend for giving me a phone and me for trying to steal but never getting away with it and it's been a while since that incident and she's going to use it against me. and what if she says she wants to send me with her brother who was my former mom's boyfriend and he raped my older sisters years ago. my mom is my adoptive mother and no one from my past life can approach me or my siblings legally. can my mom do this?

[ccsmod3]

Hi,

We are glad you reached out to us for information. While we are not legal experts, we can provide you some general guidance. Please remember there are many specifics to be considered in every person’s case.

In general, if your parents consent, you can live in another home or facility. It needs to be safe for you and capable of providing for your needs until you are 18 years old or your parents bring you back home.  We understand from your plan why you could assume consent was given; however, it is always better to have consent in writing. You can decide if it is better to ask for written consent before or after you leave and what kind if terms you want in the consent.  We can provide you help writing a custodial consent letter.

It is not a crime or illegal to runaway. In most jurisdictions, the police do not cite or arrest adults who in good faith are helping a runaway stay safe and cared for.

We would like to talk with you more about your situation in more detail. You can start that conversation through a chat on our website or by calling our crisis hotline at 1(800) RUNAWAY. Both are available 24/7 and completely confidential.

We hope to hear from you soon. Good luck.

NRS

hi i have had enough with all the rules at my house and my parents dont give me enough credit for how hard i try to stay out of trouble im thinking about running away and staying at my best freinds house i plan on letting my parents know where i am so that if they are not ok with it they can come take me back home but my question is if they never come to get me and never file a runaway report will my friends parents or my parents get in trouble

[ccsmod11]

(If you feel you are in immediate danger for any reason, please call the police or go to your local emergency room.)

Hi there,
Thanks so much for reaching out to us. It sounds like you are going through a lot right now, especially with your mom seeming to treat you like a pet and your dad almost not caring at all. We are glad that you have friends you can lean on, but that doesn’t fix the issues you’re going through. It’s normal to feel the way you do, and it’s understandable why you want to go stay with your friends. There are some legal things to consider with this, which we’ll explain below. It’s up to you to decide if the risks are worth taking for you in your situation.

The law about runaways says:
If you do choose to runaway without your parents’ permission, your parents could choose to file a runaway report with the police. The police will then find you and bring you home. Although you wouldn’t get in any trouble with the law, there is a possibility that any person you are staying with over 18 could be charged with harboring a runaway, which is a criminal charge. This issue goes away once you turn 18, since in most states you will be considered an adult.

The way to get around this would be to get written permission from your parents (an email, text, note, etc) stating that you can stay with your friends. That way if they decide to press charges, you have proof that they gave you permission. Sometimes this could look like asking to stay for a long sleepover or explaining your feelings honestly and asking for a break from home.

It also sounds like you might be thinking about suicide. If you’re in crisis, please dial 988 (suicide lifeline) to talk to a trained counselor. Otherwise, we’d love to chat with you here at NRS about finding more long-term mental health support.

The decision to leave home is a very difficult and personal decision and we support you no matter what you choose, but we’d love to help talk you through everything so you can make the best decision possible for you. The NRS is here 24/7 via online chat or by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929).

Thanks again and good luck!
NRS

hi, i'm 15, and my parents have been putting me in the middle of their fighting. My mom wants me to move with her, so her mental health can be better. i have told my mom about my suicidal thoughts, and she says that she doesn't care as long as she lives. I want to run away and live with a friend, since his parents treat me like an actual human instead of a bargaining chip. I hate living in my house, and i haven't wanted to be here in years. my dad basically doesn't care, he's only occupied with the other women he's seeing, so the only support system i have is my friends. could they get in trouble if i crashed at their house?

[ccsmod15]

Hi there, 
Thank you so much for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. You did the right thing contacting us. You mentioned that you are having a difficult time at home. Know that you deserve to feel happy and safe where you live. It is your family’s job to make you feel loved and accepted. Verbal abuse is never okay. You also mentioned a suicide attempt in this past year. Please remember that you are not alone and there is nothing more important than your life and well being. If you have suicidal inclinations again, know that 988 serves as a national hotline for suicide prevention. Additionally, you mentioned struggling with bipolar disorder. NAMI is the National Alliance on Mental Illness and they serve individuals with mental health issues and their loved ones. Their information can be found on https://nami.org/Home and they have a hotline and chat service like us. You also mentioned being in trouble with your parents for sending potentially explicit images. Even if you are the one taking the pictures of yourself, as long as you are a minor, distributing them puts you at serious legal risk. Video chat sites such as the one you mentioned might also be dangerous for meeting strangers. Your safety is our highest priority and we want you to know again that there is nothing more valuable than your life. If you run away, the police might try to send you back home and your friends would be at risk for charges against them. One way to gauge your rights is to reach out to your local non emergency police with hypothetical and anonymous questions. We are here to listen and our hotline (1-800-RUNAWAY) and chat services run 24/7. We are toll-free and confidential.

Stay strong, 
NRS