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  • Moving out at 17 with parent consent

    My question involves juvenile law in the State of:Texas. My parents are divorced, my dad has custody of me. However he is a drunk and i moved in with my aunt in a different city from him, which i now know was a mistake. The only rights she has of me is at school if anything happens they will contact her and my dad signed my school guardianship right or whatever to her. I am miserable with her and my boyfriends family wants me to move in with them, he will go to his grandparents in order for it to be appropriate because he is 18. Since my dad is okay with it and he has rights over me can i move out of my aunts? and if i did could anyone besides my dad file any charges against my boyfriend or his family? and does my dad being an alcoholic affect any of this? i want to be sure his family is safe from getting in "trouble"

  • #2
    RE: Moving out at 17 with parent consent

    Hello there –

    Thanks for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline with your concerns. From your email to us here, we can see that you have very similar questions to a lot of our callers and you’re looking for some answers. We are always here to listen and here to help in any way that we can. It can be very frustrating not knowing what to do or what your next step might be from this point on and thinking about what would happen if you did leave your aunts house.

    Now you have stated that your father is the one that has full custody over you with the exception of the school guardianship. So what that means is that you are technically allowed to leave and live in another home (i.e your boyfriends’ family) as long as you have the permission of your legal guardian. Something to keep in mid though, that since he isn’t going to court to fully transfer custody to your boyfriends’ parents or grandparents he is still going to have rights over you. This means that at any time from when you leave your aunts to when you’re 18 years old, he can change his mind at any time he wants.

    If that happens then you will have to either have to go back to your father or aunt house. If you don’t, then he has the right as your guardian to file you as a runaway youth. If your father does end up making a runaway report with the local police and you are planning on staying with your boyfriend, your parent can press charges on that family for harboring a runaway when they are not giving accurate information on your whereabouts. That could lead to a number of different legal issues and fines as a misdemeanor. So that might be something to keep in mind as well.

    Another thing is if you were planning on just leaving your aunts, she would still have school guardianship. So depending on how much control that gives her over your school records she can hold them and not allow you to transfer school; if you were planning on that at all. If you give us a call on our 24/7 hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) we could help you find resources in your area and could potentially help you brainstorm a possible solution to the issues you are having. We would love to talk to you about what has been going on recently. We also have an online chat service available every night from 4:30-11:30 PM CST that is available through our website.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      Im 17 years old.. i cant take it anymore living where i am with my parents i turn 18 in 8 months, and honestly i dont think i can wait that long. My boyfriend and i were talking the other day and he wants me to move in with him and his mom and 2 sisters i get along with them just fine. I still would be going to school except I’d have to transfer and i know i can’t do that without my parents, so I’d have to figure that out . And if I were to move my boyfriend and his mom already said they would help me get a job. Plus my boyfriend works and helps his mom pay rent . I have most things figured out but would i be making the right decision? What if i regret it?

      Comment


      • ccsmod2
        ccsmod2 commented
        Editing a comment
        Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are living in a very difficult situation at home with your parents. We don’t know what state you live in, but it sounds like you know that when you turn 18 in your state you are considered an adult.

        The key thing to know is if your parents will let you move in with your boyfriend. Based on the title of your forum post, it sounds like you have your parent’s permission to do this which is great since this won’t get law enforcement involved and get either you or your boyfriend’s family in any potential trouble.

        Regarding school, there are options to enroll in school without your parent’s help. There’s a law called the McKinney-Vento Act that provides you this right. To get help with this, you’ll need to find the McKinney-Vento “Liaison” in your state. To find the right contact for you and find out how they help you enroll in a nearby school, use a search engine like Google end enter these search terms: [STATE NAME] McKinney-Vento Liaison” (Just replace “STATE NAME” with the state you live in.

        It sounds like you may have some other concerns since this is no doubt a big step to take, so if you’d like to discuss this more, please give us a call and we can help you weigh your options.

        Thank you again for reaching out to us and we hope this has been helpful. If you’d like to discuss this anymore or chat more about what’s going on at home,, please don’t hesitate to call us at the National Runaway Safeline. You can reach us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We are here 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

    • #4
      I’m a 17 years old and I will be turning 18 in 6 months, my mom has been telling me to leave the house for a month now, but problem is I don’t have anywhere to stay at. I’m a senior in high school and have a part time job so I can provide some money for myself. I don’t know what to do or who to ask for direct help.

      Comment


      • ccsmod15
        ccsmod15 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello there,

        Thank you for reaching out to NRS and for sharing your story with us. We are sorry to hear about your situation and what you’ve been dealing with. Ideally, home would be a place where people feel safe, loved, and valued, and you do not deserve to be treated that way.

        Regarding your situation, we want you to know that you have a right to a safe place to live. If your mother kicks you out without an alternative, then that could be considered neglect and you could file a report. If you wanted to talk more about child abuse reporting or wanted support, Child Help (National Child Abuse Hotline) could be a resource for learning what reporting would look like. They are accessible by phone at 1-800-422-4453 and online at childhelp.org.

        We would encourage you to reach out to friends and family for support and/or a place to stay. Some things to consider would school enrollment (if relevant), how you would take care of your needs (eating, sleeping, healthcare), and how you would care for your safety if something were to happen. School personnel, like counselors, may know of some resources and where to reach out for help.

        We would love to talk more about the details of your situation so that we can provide specific information, like shelters and other resources in your area. If you would like to share more, please feel free to call our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or use our Live Chat.
        We hope this information was helpful and take care.
        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    • #5
      Hello,
      I will be 17 in less than 2 months. My Aunt has legal custody of me but my Mom wants me back. She is a recovering drug addict and we don’t get along. She has recently started to hit me when I am staying with her on weekends and such. I don’t want to live with my Mom. But, my Aunt and uncle are moving out of town and likely out of state soon for my uncles job. It’s a really important promotion for him and I understand why they have to do it. But I don’t want to move. Because of my Moms problems I’ve had to move a lot and I like my life right now. I have a good long term boyfriend (over a year) and his family are so good to me. They go to church and take me to their family reunions and on vacations. They are more than willing to let me move in if I get my aunts permission. But she will not sign over custody as she doesn’t think it’s needed or proper to give me over legally to a boyfriends family. I have gotten into trouble with the law before but I’ve been really good since getting off of probation months ago.
      Many question is, in OHio can my Mom force me to go with her? She signed away her rights. And is my Aunt legally allowed to give me permission to move in with friends or family? Ohio laws are very strict on children cases I know that as we can’t get emancipated.
      Please help I don’t want to end up with my mom, I really am Afraid her physically violence will radically escalate.
      thank you.

      Comment


      • ccsmod6
        ccsmod6 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you’re going through a really tough spot, but you’re handling it in a mature and thoughtful manner. We’re not legal experts but we do have a great deal of experience working with runaway youth. It is our understanding that if your aunt is your legal guardian, she is the one legally responsible for your wellbeing and she has the right to decide where you live. She also has the right to file a runaway report if you leave home without her permission. If your mom is not your legal guardian, she does not have that responsibility or those rights. We hope that answers your concerns and if you have any other questions please do not hesitate to give us a call on our 24/7 hotline at 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

        Take care,
        NRS

    • #6
      Hello ccsmod6,
      I am who posted yesterday. About my Mom, Aunt and Boyfriends Family issues. Thank you very much for responding. I’ve talked with my Aunt and she is willing to discuss me staying with my boyfriends family so that I can stay in my current school, I go to a special program. I was put into it because of my behavior issues but it is a half day program that lets me earn credits for working and it’s a really small class size so I get a lot of help. I was having trouble in normal school but am doing a lot better and even making up missed credits.
      My Aunt is afraid my Mom will try to call the cops and make trouble if she allows me to stay at my boyfriends family to stay in my school, mainly because I will have my own room there and can continue the program. I just want to make sure I understand and can show her this post, and I totally get you aren’t lawyers or anything.
      But your saying she is allowed to legally give me permission to live in someone else’s house as long as she understands this is not giving up her legal rights that she is still responsible for me legally. So that my Mom who signed away her rights can’t just call the cops and make trouble because she doesn’t agree with my Aunts choice. My Aunt is even willing to sign a POA for my boyfriends Mom so she can sign me up for school and take me to get medical help if needed.
      Thank you for saying I’m handling this rough time well.
      i am really afraid of living with my Mom. She’s not in drugs anymore but she hit me so hard last week she left marks on my face and neck. My Aunt doesn’t want her to try and take her to court and neither do I.
      Thank you again
      -Madds

      Comment


      • ccsmod6
        ccsmod6 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi, Madds. What you’re going to want to check with your aunt is that she is your legal guardian. You will want to make sure that your mom does not have any parental rights. If she does not, we would be surprised if there were anything she could do to make you do anything. You will want to make sure that your aunt has some sort of documentation proving that your aunt is your legal guardian. If your mom does call the cops, you can use that documentation to prove your aunt is your guardian and then your aunt can reassure the police that you have permission to be where you are. Again, we’re not legal experts, but it is our understanding that your guardian can give you permission to live somewhere other than their home. It sounds like your situation with your mom is not sustainable and we wish you all the best settling in with your boyfriend’s family. Unfortunately, we are not allowed to respond to a forum poster more than twice, so if you would like to you continue this conversation, please call us on our 24/7 hotline 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

        Take care,
        NRS

    • #7
      Hi, I am in a situation and not sure what to do. I am 17 and I am starting college soon. I'm graduating early, this December, and I will still be 17. The college is an hour away and my mom is okay with me getting my own place (and possibly a roommate who is 1 but my dad is ok with it too, but thinks that someone could call the cops or defacs on my parents... If I have consent from both of them, can they get introuble? Or would I be able to live alone?

      Comment


      • ccsmod2
        ccsmod2 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello There,
        Thank you for contacting The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. We are not legal experts but do have some general information on the laws. If both parents give you permission than the police most likely would not get involved. Usually the police are only notified if your parents file a runaway report or if child protective services were involved. If you are safe and moved to attend college than most likely DCFS would not get involved. You can also contact your local police and seeing what they would do in this situation.
        Congrats on graduating early and for starting college, that is a really big accomplishment. We want you to know we are here 24/7 if you have any other questions. Best of luck!
        NRS

    • #8
      Hey I’m Paola so my mom let me move to my boyfriend’s house now since school started I’m trying to transfer to the school that I should be in since I live in the area. Can I transfer myself?

      Comment


      • ccsmod1
        ccsmod1 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hey Paola,

        Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what's been going on. You may be able to enroll yourself in school under the McKinney-Vento act. This act guarantees you the right to stay in your original school and be provided transportation to and from school (to the extent possible), enrollment in a school in your area, receive free school meals and to receive services like educational supports and basic needs. To find out more about how to take advantage of the McKinney-Vento act we suggest calling your school directly.

        Be safe,
        NRS

    • #9
      I got my mothers consent to move out at 17, which I did. But now she wants me to come back to her house. Is it possible for her to “revoke consent” even though I already have the proof of her consent. This is in the state of Georgia.

      Comment


      • ccsmod13
        ccsmod13 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello,

        Thank you for contacting NRS. This a really good question to ask. Even though your mother gave you permission to leave home, she is still your guardian and can revoke consent at any time. In the event that she does this and files a runaway report, the police might return you home. There is a possibility the police department may not pursue this runaway report very strictly because of your age.

        We hope this gave you the information you were looking for. If you have any other questions or you want to talk more about what is going on, do not hesitate to call (1-800-786-2929) or chat with us anytime. We are here 24/7 to help.

        Take care,
        NRS

    • #10
      I am a 17 year old who lives in New Mexico. My mother and I have been in a bad situation lately. She found out that I did something and she wants me to break up with my boyfriend. She threatened me that if I didn’t, she would call the cops on him and make me tell them he assaulted me. I am terrified, my boyfriend has been the only one there for me and I don’t want to do this. We both talked about me moving in with him, but since I’m only 17 I have limited options.

      Comment


      • ccsmod7
        ccsmod7 commented
        Editing a comment
        Thank you for contacting National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are dealing with a tough situation at home right now and that you really care about your boyfriend.

        We understand that your boyfriend has been there for you, and that you are scared about your mom’s threat. That seems so difficult to deal with. Generally speaking, it is illegal for your mom to make a false police report like that. Are there other people you can talk to in your life about this: a relative, a friend, a teacher? It also can help to include a supportive adult who can talk to your mom for you in on the situation. If she does do that and you all are in need of legal resources to help your situation, please call or chat us.

        While we are not legal experts, the age of majority in New Mexico is 18. This means that until you turn 18, you are still considered a minor and that your guardian is legally responsible for you. If you were to move in with your boyfriend before you turn 18, your mom could file a runaway report and the police could possibly return you home.

        We are glad you reached out to us today. We are always here if you want to discuss your situation further. You can contact us anytime at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). Thank you again for sharing your story.

        -NRS
        Last edited by ccsmod7; 09-19-2019, 12:21 PM.

    • #11
      I'm 17 years, I'm turning 18 next year.... the issue is i can't take it anymore at home living with my parents toxicity. I've had enough of them... last week i got into an argument with my mom because i talked back, I was telling her how i felt about her and my dad treating me over the years, even though i tried my best to keep it inside, i couldn't control my rage so i said something i knew i shouldn't have said, so she slapped me, but deep inside i knew she deserved it. Every time i'm around them they start to judge me, for example comparing me with my sisters about our physical, saying that i'm not enough, how "skinny" i am, which my dad has sometimes called me "skeleton" even though i eat every day, that I don't do anything at home like cleaning.... i can't be myself at all or have freedom to go out... it really hurts that they're the ones causing this huge pain in my chest because their my parents, i loved them and all, but I've had enough of them. I've even have cried and thought about committing suicide at night, my mind just starts to wander off to the other side. Another thing is that my mom doesn't support me in my dreams or ideas, like whenever i want to say something about how i want to start my own business at my young age, she turns me down by saying something negative, which i really take it to heart. Being at home, doesn't feel like home... i have this urge to runaway. I want to be happy, I need positiveness in my life. I'm actually in a relationship with someone two years older than me, he's been there for me for over a year and 3 months and we've been talking about me moving out with him, of course with my parents consent. He wants to meet my parents in person and ask them for their permission of letting me live with him, but i don't know how things will end due to our age difference and school. Sex is not something we have in mind until we're fully ready to take responsibility of another life, what we're currently focusing on is entrepreneurship. I want to start my own business and so does he. He works with his grandpa in construction and trades currencies, making money through his phone. He told me, he wants to help me become a better version of myself, he wants to see me succeed in life, and just be happy that I'm alive.

      Comment


      • #12
        Hi there,

        Thank you for reaching out to NRS. It takes courage to tell us about what’s going on at home, and reaching out for support is a great first step. We’re so sorry you’re going through that. We’re glad that you’ve found someone who listens to you, believes in you, and supports you in working towards your dreams. It sounds like you two have a great relationship. Since you’re a minor, the law requires that your parents provide you with adequate food and shelter. However, if your parents give their consent, you are able to live somewhere else. This is sometimes called an “alternative living arrangement.”

        You don’t deserve to be slapped by anyone, especially not your mom. You’re able to report any mistreatment to your state’s CPS (Child Protective Services) office. NRS is able to conference call with you if you want help making an abuse report, or we can make one for you. If this is an option you’d like to explore, please call our 24/7 crisis center. Child Help USA is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed; their phone number is 1-800-422-4453, and their website is www.childhelp.org. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is also a great resource if you’ve thought about committing suicide. Their number is 1-800-273-8255 and their website is www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org. Talking to school counselors and teachers about what’s going on at home could also provide you with some support.

        You are not alone in this. You are always welcome to call into our 24/7 crisis center at 1-800-RUNAWAY, or use our chatting services via our website. We’re here to listen, and we’re here to help.

        Be safe,
        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #13
          I'm 17, I won't be 18 until another year. Yesterday I had a long conversation with my dad about how I've changed my attitude in the past 10 months. I didn't even realize it, I've had an attitude towards life saying "I just don't care," like if my parents wanted to kick me out I wouldn't care. I don't think I realized it until yesterday. But when I was talking to my dad I told him I just felt as though I was ready to move out. He told me he didn't care if I did, not that he wanted me to, but he would let me regardless. My father gave me consent to move out, does that mean at my age (again 17) I can move out? I already have a job, and I'm already working on getting a second job.

          Comment


          • ccsmod13
            ccsmod13 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            Thanks for reaching out to NRS. It sounds like you have gotten to a place in your life where you feel like leaving home is a good option for you. It is really mature and thoughtful of you to acknowledge how your attitude and mindset has changed over the time. You know best when it is the right time for you to leave.

            In general, your parents can legally decide where you live until you turn 18. So if your dad (legal guardian) gives you permission to live somewhere else than you can do so without police intervention. However, it is helpful to keep in mind that your dad can take back his consent at any time. Should your dad take away his consent, he can report you as a runaway and attempt to have police return you home. If your dad is okay with you leaving and does not report you as a runaway then you can choose to live somewhere else. Your safety is important to us. Before you leave, you might want to think of things like where you will be living, if you will have enough money to live on your own, plans for school, and what you will do in the case of a medical emergency.

            We want to be a support for you while you consider your next steps. Please do not hesitate to reach out by phone or chat at any time (800-786-2929 ; 1800runaway.org) if you want to talk more and explore your options.

            Be safe,
            NRS

        • #14
          I live in Alaska and I am trying to go to a college in California. My parents and I are wondering if I can go out of Alaska in the beginning of my senior year and stay with a family friend so I graduate from California and am there for a year so I can get in state tuition. But they are saying I can’t until second semester because I am not 18 until November. Can I go to California alone in the beginning of the year or do I have to wait until I’m 18?

          Comment


          • ccsmod13
            ccsmod13 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            Thank you for reaching out to NRS and sharing a bit about your situation. From what you mentioned, you want to leave home to live with a family friend for your senior year of high school, but your parents are concerned because you will still be a minor for a part of that time You can leave home with the permission of your parents if they make sure that you have a safe place to stay where you are being supported. So if they arrange for you to stay with a family friend then this would be considered an alternative living arrangement. They can even sign over temporary guardianship so that this family friend can do take care of things like school enrollment and medical emergencies. If you do NOT have permission from your parents to leave then it would be much more difficult to do this.

            We hope this gives you the information you were looking for. We are available 24/7 if you have any other questions or concerns.

            Good luck!
            NRS

        • #15
          I am turning 17 in January and I live in Ohio but I don't plan on doing anything till after I turn 17. I have a history of sneaking out but my mom reported that I kept running away even though I wasn't it was just to hang out with friends.Basically I want to leave my house but I don't want to have to go back to Juvie.I still will go to school and finish my community service hours I just want to get out of my house.

          Comment


          • ccsmod4
            ccsmod4 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello,
            Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

            We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. it sounds like you would like to move out of your parent’s home because of some conflict about the rules.

            We would like to be of assistance to you if we can. It is times like these that would be nice to have a listening ear. If you would like to talk about your situation, NRS is here to listen and here to help.
            We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat so that we might learn a little more about your situation and how we might assist you. Again if you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

            Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

            We hope to hear from you soon.

            Take care,
            NRS
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