Leaving home when only one parent consents.

Thanks so much for reaching out. It sounds like you have been dealing with your mom’s emotional abuse for a long time and are feeling frustrated and overwhelmed. No one deserves to be treated that way. It’s understandable you’d want to leave home, and it shows a lot of maturity that you are researching all your options before acting.

Although we’re not legal experts, if your dad gives you permission to leave home, you would not be running away. Theoretically though, your mom could still report you as a runaway to police without telling him, or he could change his mind. In general, if a parent/guardian reports a minor as a runaway to police, the police have the right to bring you home. That said, we have found sometimes different jurisdictions will treat runaway reports for 17-year-olds differently, because they are so close to being of legal age. One option is to call the non-emergency number of your local police department to see how they would handle someone in your situation.

You also have the right to report the abuse you have experienced to authorities at any time, either by telling a teacher at school, calling the police, or contacting your state’s abuse reporting hotline. In Montana, that number is (866) 820-5437. Child Help, a 24/7 confidential hotline at 1-800-422-4453, is also a great resource and can help answer questions about reporting and possible outcomes.

We at NRS are also here for you 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929 if you’d like to talk more about your situation, brainstorm other options and find resources in your area.

I am 17, living in montana. My mother is abusive in all ways except physical. Despite knowing I have depression, she often isolates me from people that make me feel more like an actual person again. She often threatens to make my dad pull me out of therapy. At this point I'd honestly rather be dead than continue living with her. Knowing this my god mother has offered me a place to stay. My dad is also willing to allow me to move out. How ever my mother is trying to trap me. She recently almost made me lose my job when she would not allow me to leave the house over winter break. I want to make sure that if she tried to get the law involves, would she have a high chance of getting me again, with the fact that I have my dad's permission to live with my god mom?

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