15 considering running away

[Guest]

Hi, im 15 and ive been considering running away from home for long time now. (Sorry in advance for the long message and possibly confusing explanation.) I live with my mom and siblings and im not in any danger living with them. However I have been having this feeling for a long time like I NEED to be away from them. Affection with them almost disgusts me? I dont really feel like I love them how they love me. I feel bad about it, but I cant help the feelings. Just being around them makes me uncomfortable, annoyed, angry, upset, weak? Its more complex but I dont think thats too relevant. Im also depressed and its getting worse. Ive been depressed since my mom had to move my siblings and I out of the state we grew up in 5 years ago and it affected me a lot. A talk with her would be pretty useless because she has kindly, subtly hinted that we are not moving back. I am extremely unhappy living here and im considering going back to the state and staying with a close friend (one of the only people who makes me happy), but my mom would predict I went back to my home state and id be found easily. She doesnt know the friend id be staying with, but my older sister does and I think she would probably tell my mom "for my own safety" and because thats the kind of person she is. If I didnt go to my home state, there is a friend in another state almost the same distance away who I could stay with and nobody in my family knows about. Id really prefer to go to my home state though. I have absolutely no idea how I would travel. If I dont run away I would probably turn to suicide, but I want to give myself atleast a chance at happiness. Sorry this was really confusing.

[ccsmod9]

Hi there,

Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.

While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions. It sounds like you’re fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change. Your safety and well-being is important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255); www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org is also a great resource to reach out to in addition to our crisis services.

We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

Be safe,

NRS