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Im 17 in Florida and want to run away

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  • Im 17 in Florida and want to run away

    I am 17 years old and I live with my mother. My mother is a heavy drinker and is always drinking and never pays attention to me. I have to take care of her like she is my own child and I always have to watch over her. She goes out and drinks all the time and i have to track her phone to be able to go get her and get her home safe. She always takes the child support money that is supposed to be used for me to spend it on herself for clothes or alcohol. I do not feel safe here and I want out of the house. She also had an abusive boyfriend who beat me for months and didn't do anything about it till they broke up and he comes around the house a lot still. Is there anyway I can do this without her consent? I want to go and live with my boyfriend and his parents but I do not know how to without my mothers consent.

  • #2
    RE: Im 17 in Florida and want to run away

    Hello,

    Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you’re in a very difficult situation at home and we’re sorry to hear that. We’re not legal experts but we can speak in general terms about the laws effecting minors leaving home without permission. When you are this close to being 18, it usually comes down to what action the legal guardian and the police want to take. You do have some leeway being that age, meaning your mom still reserves the right to call the police and report you as a runaway but the police might not always come looking for you. They are expected to file a report if they take one from your parent, and if they know your location, they might show up but they are not always required to take you home if you are safe. If you feel like you are safer staying with your boyfriend’s parents and they consent to the situation, the police might be able to work that out with you. Another possibility is the police might charge your boyfriend’s family with harboring a minor. This is something you could discuss with your local police station and we would be happy to help you make that phone call. We would love to hear more about your situation. Have you considered alternative living situations before? Have you spoken to your boyfriend’s family?

    We hope we have answered most of your questions. If you need more specific answers, the police are certainly one option. If you wish to speak to us in person, we can be reached confidentially 24 hours a day at 1800RUNAWAY. We wish you luck.

    -NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    info@1800runaway.org (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      17 from florida

      live with my parents almost three months I'll be 18 and my parents treat me like a child instead of indult I just want to leave this environment so bad but no one is helping at all its not fair I feel like a slave

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: 17 from florida

        Hello and thanks for reaching out on our forum.

        It sounds like you’re having a difficult time with your parents and have just about 3 months until you’re 18. We imagine it is frustrating having your parents treating you like a child and it sounds like you’ve reached a breaking point. Many cities in Florida offer runaway/homeless youth shelters which might offer you a break from home. They will likely need to speak to a parent/guardian at some point; however, they may be able to also offer family counseling or mediation to you and your parents. http://nationalsafeplace.org/ is one place to search to see if there is a runaway/homeless youth organization in your area. We can also do a search in our database if we know your city/town. Hopefully this gives you a start and feel free to try out our Live Chat.
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        info@1800runaway.org (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #5
          Hello I'm a parent of a 16 y/o and her friend is 17 and is being mistreated at home and wants to stay at my house but her mom keeps threating to send police to my for harbouring a minor what can I do?

          Comment


          • ccsmod5
            ccsmod5 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi,
            Thanks for reaching out. It sounds like your daughter’s friend is in a tough position. It’s great that you’re able to advocate for her and support her through this, though. We’re unsure what you mean by “mistreated.” If this is a case of abuse, you have the right to report any abuse to child protective services. For more information about what constitutes abuse and what might happen if an abuse report is filed, you can call the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453. However, if there’s no abuse going on, unfortunately there isn’t much you can do. The legal guardian has the right to file a runaway report if their child leaves without permission and is under 18. While there’s a possibility that you could be charged with harboring a runaway, this is unlikely. The usual outcome is that the police will take the youth back home. If you’d like to speak more specifically about the situation, feel free to give us a call.
            Thank you again for reaching out. We hope this was helpful and we encourage you to reach out by phone if you need additional resources or need help figuring out your options. Our number is 1-800-786-2929 and our lines are always open. If you have a moment, we'd appreciate your feedback of our crisis services at the following link:
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think
            Stay safe!

        • #6
          I'm 17 from florida and i want to runaway. i live with my dad and step mom and at every single minute of this place. i get yelled at constanly, always doing everything around the house and have no time for my school work. i want to runaway but i dont want to have my best friends parents getting in trouble for it. Please help.

          Comment


          • ccsmod3
            ccsmod3 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            Thanks for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline and sharing a little bit about what is going on. Sounds like you are in a difficult environment at home.
            We aren’t legal experts, but we have general knowledge about running away. In most states, running away isn’t illegal, but what is called a status offense. You can’t get arrested for it but it will mostly likely go on your record until you are 18. The police will only know if you have runaway if your parents/guardians file a police report. We can’t say for sure how the police will respond since you are 17 and may be seen a lot , but we hear a lot that police will take potential places you might be and will actively search for you. If they come across you, the most likely will return you home to your parents. Sometimes we hear that if you are staying with someone who knows you are a runaway and are not actively trying to return you or finding shelter for you, your guardians/or police can press charges against the people who are housing you, with something that is called harboring. One of our main goals is to make sure you are safe, so if you ever seriously decide to run away and need shelter, resources, or a safe place to go you can find safe locations at nationalsafeplace.org or reach out to us directly and we can find local resources in your area.

            It can be difficult to know how to talk to your parents and express your feelings about how you are feeling. We would encourage you to reach out to a trusted adult, teacher, relative, and friend that you can talk to and potentially help you mediate a conversation with your parents about your current situation. At NRS, we do offer a service call conference calling, where you can call into our hotline and then we would reach out to your guardian and help advocate for you, help you express the needs of to your parents.

            We are here for you and will support you in anyway that we can. Please feel free to call into us directly as we can talk further about your situation and find resources that are best for you in your area. Stay strong and you are not alone in this! Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY we are open 24/7.
            We hope this response was helpful! We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey.

            -NRS

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

        • #7
          Hello. I am 17 and a half. NRS reccomended that I contact you. I plan on running away next month. My dad said to me EXACTLY in March “Go ahead and leave. I wont even look for you if you do.” This is not fabricated at all; it is exactly what he told me. My life at home is extremely terrible. I am not allowed to do anything. I cannot participate in extra curricular activities, my senior prom just passed, and I was not allowed to go to that. I am not allowed to live my life like a regular teen would. I am not even allowed to have friends. I’m not even trying to go to parties and have sex or drink, I just want to be able to have some freedom, especially with education. My dad was also arrested last year for battery against me and CPS got involved, but they were unable to remove me from my house since the incident was reported two months after it happened and my bruises healed by then. I am not even allowed to choose what college/University I can go to. I was recently accepted into a prestigious university, but since it required freshmen to live in dorms, I was forced to reject the offer. I have tried numerous times to form a bond with my mother, and try to express myself to her, but she always pretends to understand me, then goes off to my dad and talks behind my back, then my dad starts a huge argument with me, and then chaos happens. This has been happening for several years. A plurality of people, EVEN GROWNUPS WITH CHILDREN, have told me that my parents are extremely ridiculous. My brother ran away at 16. He is now in his 20s and is living a great life. My parents always make me feel so bad about myself. I want to leave very badly. I would have a place to stay. I am a graduating senior, and have many scholarships that would pay for schooling and personal needs. I also have participated in college classes, so I would be able to get my degree faster. I honestly just want some advice. What are my options? I really cannot live like this anymore.

          Comment


          • ccsmod10
            ccsmod10 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello,

            If you have contacted NRS today through another means (for example, live chat, email or bulletin) for the same issue, it would be helpful to let us know that you have already contacted us. NRS understands it takes courage to reach out for help; therefore, we would like to minimize the need for you to repeat your situation and avoid offering you duplicate services.

            Best of luck,
            NRS

        • #8
          My friend is 17 and she is not safe with her dad and mom or her sister she gets abused she called the cops many times but the places she got hit wasn’t red by the time they came. Is she aloud to live with a friend in till she turns 18?

          Comment


          • ccsmod7
            ccsmod7 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello there, thanks for reaching out today for your friend. Sounds like she is enduring a lot of abuse from her family and is not safe at home. That must be incredibly difficult for her, and you seem like a great support. She does not deserve to be harmed, and that is frustrating that the cops have not intervened when called.

            While police have been failing her, she does have the right to report the abuse to Child Protective Services (CPS). We are not experts on the issue, but generally once it's been reported, social services will either decide whether or not to take the case and further investigate. If they do take the case, they will send out someone from child protective services to do an investigation (interviewing people in the household) and from there they will decide the level of danger within the household. It generally ranges from no danger (the youth stays in the home, some services are given, and the case is closed), moderate danger (they will provide family services with possible temporary displacement) and high danger (they will remove the youth from the home and offer certain services). Reaching out to Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 or www.childhelp.org may help to get a better understanding of what may happen before and after a report is made.

            Generally speaking, 18 is usually the age a person can leave home without guardian permission, but it does depend on state laws and local police protocol. If your friend leaves home, her guardians could unfortunately report her as a runaway and if she is found it is possible she could be returned home by police - especially if they do not see evidence of the abuse again. To learn more about how local police respond to 17 year old runaway situations, you might call your local non-emergency number and ask hypothetical questions about whether they would take a runaway report for a 17 year old.

            We hope this information is helpful! Please do not hesitate to call or chat us or if your friend our number so we can best help.

            Best of luck,

            NRS

        • #9
          i'm 17 and my parents make me feel like i'm in a cage. there's cameras constantly watching in and out of the house, my mom doesn't trust me at all and i feel treated like a child. i want to runaway and go live with my sister. i don't think my parents will file a police report. i want to make her my legal guardian but i don't want my parents to try and stop me. how easy is it to make her my guardian.

          Comment


          • ccsmod2
            ccsmod2 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello there,

            Thank you for reaching out to NRS and having the strength to share your story with us. We are sorry to hear about your situation and what you’ve been dealing with. Ideally, home would be a place where people feel safe, loved, and valued, and you do not deserve to be treated that way. You’ve been very courageous to reach out for help and try your best despite the circumstances.

            Although NRS is not a legal agency, we can try to give a general idea of possible outcomes if you were to run away. If you are considered a minor in your state, you are still under your parents’ guardianship, therefore at any point when you are gone, they are legally within their rights to file a runaway report. Being a runaway is a status offense, and while you would not be charged with a crime, if police came across you, they would probably return you home. They could also potentially press charges against people who took you into their care for “harboring a runaway;” these charges would be misdemeanors, but still criminal offenses.

            In regards to your plan of living with your sister, we would encourage you to speak with your parents if you haven’t already about this. Some things to consider would be guardianship, school enrollment, how you would take care of your needs (eating, sleeping, healthcare), and how you would care for your safety if something were to happen. If you were interested, we also offer conference-calling as an option, where we would mediate a constructive conversation between your parents and yourself in order to reach an understanding.

            In terms of guardianship laws, we do have some legal resources but you would need to call in to access them, as we do not share sensitive information on a public forum. If you would like to talk about other resources and support, feel free to call our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or use our Live Chat.
            We hope this information was helpful and take care.
            National Runaway Safeline
            info@1800runaway.org (Crisis Email)

        • #10
          My son left the house he is 17 . He is staying at a friends house but I don’t know where . What will the police do if I call . I’m in Cape Coral Fl .

          Comment


          • ccsmod10
            ccsmod10 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hey there,

            Thanks for reaching out to us, it takes a lot of strength to share your story. It sounds like you care a great deal about your son and his safety.

            Since your son is 17, he is considered a minor in the state of Florida. If you’d like, you can file a runaway report which is essentially a missing person report. We’re not legal experts, but generally speaking, if a report has been filed and the police or other authorities locate your son, they will bring him home.

            It can be very hard to face situations like this on your own and it may be beneficial to reach out to some other agencies for additional support. The National Center for Missing and Exploited Children (NCMEC) is dedicated to helping locate missing children and prevent their exploitation. You can contact them anytime by calling 1-800-843-5678 or check out their website at missingkids.com. You can also try calling Team H.O.P.E. (Help Offering Parents Empowerment), a support hotline run by parents who have been in similar situations; their number is 1-866-305-4673.

            If you want to talk more in depth about the situation or if you want to go over other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on the top of our home page. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way that we can.

            All the best,
            NRS
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