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I want to live with my father but my mother has custody.

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  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I really want to stay with someone else not my mom. I am 17 and about to graduate, but I turn 18 in September. I will already be in college. I cannot wait that long. She does certain things for no reason and I try to understand her, but she never tries to understand me. I am tired of dealing with her. Yes, she has dealt with me for 17 years, but school is really stressing me out and she is not understanding. I have no idea what I want to do with my life, but she does not care about that. She works all the time and never spends time with my brother and I. We barely have food at the house. She does not want me to have a job because she wants me to focus on school, but I cannot do that if I am wondering where my next meal is going to be. We have 2 dogs that my brother takes care of because she does not. They are inside dogs and they have fleas. The fleas get in our rooms and on our beds. The place we are staying has flies as well. My older sister left because she could not do it anymore. I know she is not perfect, but she is not even trying anymore.

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  • ccsmod0
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    We are glad you reached out to us. Unfortunately, we are not experts on legal matters, such as custody. These are questions that may be better answered by legal services or your by calling your local nonemergency police number. You can always call us, and we can help talk through your options. In this case, we would not be able to tell you how that custody agreement might work, but we could help you look up legal services as a way to help you find the answers to your questions.

    Best of luck,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hello, I want to live with my dad I see him 2 times a week. My mom has done nothing to me she trys to keep me happy. I just have a better relationship with my dad than my mom. I have a couple of questions hopefully you have an answer to all my questions. Me and my 6 year old sister cannot be separated we are like to peas and a pod if we go with a judge will my sister have the same days with my mom and same days with my dad if I go live with my father most of the time. Also my father lives with my grandma, grandpa,2 uncle's, 1 aunt and 1 little cousin. I share a room with my sister with my dad and my mom . Will my dad have to move to a house or an apartment so we can live with him full time

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod10
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Be safe, NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm about to turn 11 and 8 want to live with my father. I love my father more than my mom me and him have a strong relationship. Me and my mom don't I love but not as much as my dad. My sister is 6 and when i live with my father full time I want her to live with me. I'm almost like here mom I have always protected here from mean people at school. Or here homework but I don't no if she can come with me. And will the judge say yes to my wish or no. My dad lives with my grandma and my 2 uncle one aunt and 2 year old little cousin will that be a problem or will my dad have to move into a house or apartment

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It takes a lot of courage to reach out for help, and we are glad you did.
    We are sorry to hear that you dealing with a difficult home life. You deserve to feel safe and loved and abuse of any kind is never ok. We don’t like to generalize because each person’s situation is unique. Custody can be tricky- but if your dad is open to the idea, he can petition the court for a different custody arrangement.
    We want you to know that you are not alone- there are many resources you can turn to when you are feeling overwhelmed or suicidal. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is a 24/7 hotline that provides support. Another great option would be reaching out to a trusted teacher or school counselor. They are trained to help youth during difficult times. Having a strong support system can make a huge difference.
    You can also reach out directly to us via chat or over the phone- we can then provide specific resources for you.

    Best of luck,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    im 13 and currently live at my moms house. sheś always getting mad at me little things such as eating newer apples instead of older ones and forgetting to mop while on school vacation. she always says rude things to me like ¨go disapear, its what you do best¨ and she occasionally hits me with blunt objects such as books. i also have a stepdad that i dont like at all and always spoils my siblings while personally going out to get me in trouble by bringing up things from YEARS ago. my dad on the other hand loves me so very much and is disgusted at all of this. he lives a few cities away and i only see him twice a month. his house is near a school with great kids and is very close to my grandma who almost passed away but made it through. i hate it here, i hate it SO MUCH!! i told my mom i wanted to move away and she lost her ******** and started bawling in hysterics and told me she doesnt love me anymore and my step dad (as usual) gave me ******** about it. i just want to leave. if i cant leave this hell house. i might actually kill myself. please help me. i really need it. i feel like im always gonna cry and spend a lot of time in my room. my friends have noticed it i need help

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  • ccsmod10
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.

    While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with, like your mom may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway if she is not supposed to have you there. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.

    We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My parents we divide my mom has custody and I want to live with my dad I turn 13 on February 21 will I be able to say where I can stay

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  • ccsmod13
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for reaching out to us! We know it can be difficult to reach out for help in tough situations. It sounds like you’ve lived with your mom few years and it hasn’t been working out for the best. It might be helpful communicating more to your dad about what you’ve been thinking considering the way your mom has responded in the past so that you can have more information about what you can do to safely live with your dad. It might be helpful to find some legal aid who can help you find answers for your specific case, we do provide legal aid resources specific to each state. If you would like some legal aid options to find out more about how to transfer custody to your dad, which he can call and use as well, please call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat with us at 1800RUNAWAY.org so that we can find something that will work for your state. You don’t deserve to have to deal with a manipulative situation and you should be able to express yourself to your parents, we are here to listen and help with what we can. Another service we could help with is our conference call service. A conference call is where we help mediate a constructive conversation between you and a parent, if you’d like we can help you have a calmer conversation between you and your mom where both sides ae heard and blaming, yelling, and swearing are avoided. We understand you are scared of the outcome. Which is why it may be best to search all your options before doing anything. Talking to us, legal aid, your dad, or other people around who might be able to give advice is a hard but big and important step.

    We wish you the best of luck!

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My parents got divorced when I was 9. I’m now 14 and live with my mom. I originally was going to live with my dad but my mom manipulated me to stay with her. I now want to live with my dad. I have asked my mom before if I wanted to If I could live with my dad. After I asked her she yelled that I didn’t love her and etc. when every me and my mom get into fights she threatens to leave and runaway to make me beg her to stay. My older sister told child services about it but my mom lied to child services about it and I could do nothing about it. My dad as asked several times if I want to move in with him. I really want to live with my dad but I’m scared what my mom will do.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    replied
    Hello,

    Thank you for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline. Your situation sounds difficult. It was really courageous of you to reach out to us. You deserve to be treated better.

    If you ever seem to be locked out of the house and denied access to food and water you can always call 911. You are still a minor and they will be able to help you get back in. You deserve to feel supported and loved. Child Help is also a great resource in regards to the way your mom and step dad are treating you. Their number is 1800-422-4453.

    Your situation seems frustrating and unsettling. NAMI is a resource that you can reach out to to talk about how you are feeling. Their number is 1800-950-NAMI. You can also text NAMI to 741741. You are not alone in this.

    We can discuss your situation further if you call us at 1800-786-2929 or message us via our live chat at www.1800runaway.org. We are available 24/7 and are confidential.

    Stay safe!
    National Runaway Safeline

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Im 17 years old , when 8i was growing i use to think that my mom doesn't love me , even now i sometimes feel like that . i remember before she got married to my stepdad i was still in primary she use to tell her siblings that she doesn't want me . I was young i couldnt even explain the feeling , and she planted a seed she can't take out in me .

    she would even beat me up for things i didn't do and my little bro would make sure that I'm always fighting with my mom. My real dad wasnt living with us but everytime i was down i would call him and he would make sure i laugh before he hangs up the phone

    sometimes my mom would tease me , isolate me , insult me .

    She then got married and she moved in her husbands house wth me , i think my dad doesnt love me
    whenever he leaves locks out the house and leave me outside with no water , nor food
    everytime i do a little thing he takes my phone and hide it . If i get a new one he takes it too

    i failed my grade 11 and he punished me with a 6 months house arrest


    i wanna leave his house and go to my real dads place

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod1
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It sounds like there is a lot of tension between you and your mom and stepdad and recent events have compounded things and it must be really frustrating. We aren’t legal experts here at NRS, but generally speaking, if you do opt to leave your home your mom can file a runaway report, which is essentially a missing person report. Running away is a status offense; this means that it isn’t illegal, but it’s something you can’t do while still a minor. If a runaway report is filed and you are located by the authorities you will most likely be returned home. Sometimes if you are close to turning 18 the police may let you stay where you are but that policy is highly dependent on your location. You can call out to your local nonemergency police department (you can usually dial 311) to verify local runaway policy.

    It seems like your mom isn’t fully understanding you when you are trying to relay your thoughts and feelings about your current level of independence. It could be a good idea to work with a local family counselor or have a conversation mediated by a school counselor/social worker, trusted friend, or family member to help clear the air. If you'd like, you can also call us directly and we can conduct a conference call with your mom so you have a safe environment where you can express yourself.

    If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

    Stay safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    i'm 17 with a 9 month old, I live with my mother and she has full custody of me but i want to live with my father. My father is know for doing drugs, but me and him have a good relationship compared to my mother and stepdad, i have betrayed my parents trust and recently did it again and I keep doing it because I want to be independent already but my mother says i'm immature and act 12, I've tried to leave before but my mom said my dad had to bring me back because she has full custody, i tend to want to live with my dad the most when something bad happens because I get depressed and stressed and I just want to live with my dad ever since I was 13. Can I just have my dad pick me up and he not have to take me back or do I need to talk to a judge?
    Is running away illegal? How old do I have to be before I leave home? What is emancipation? We can address these legal questions and more about runaway and homeless youth on this board.

    Leave a comment:

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