I know I'm being dumb.

[Guest]

I want to run away because life at home sucks. My grandpa is mean and yells at everyone and my brother who used to be my best friend bullies me. My gf said that she would let me stay with her if I somehow made it there but she's in North Carolina and I'm in Colorado. I don't know how I would even get there and frankly I think I'm close to being kicked out of the house but I'm broke.

[ccsmod8]

Hello there –

Thank you for taking the time out of your day to get into contact with us here at the National Runaway Safeline on our public forum, we are always here to listen and here to help in any way that we can. We do want to say that it must be very hard for you to have to go through all of this. It sounds like a very stressful situation for you at home. Hopefully by supporting you there are other that are reading through this thread that can relate can feel helped as well. We found a response that was already written on this public form that might give you some information.

“As you have probably read in other threads, the laws on that specific subject of just leaving home and/or running away vary from state to state. Now we aren’t legal experts, but what generally what typically happens in each state is if you are below the legal age of majority (18 in most states except Alabama and Nebraska [19 or upon marriage], and Mississippi [21]), your parents would be able to make a runaway report in the event that you do run away. Since it’s only considered a statues offense and not a crime to run away, the only thing that would happen is that the police will pick you up and bring you back home. Now we have reached out to several police departments over the time and they all say that it doesn’t matter if you’re 17 or close to turning 18 years old, that they will still take a runaway report because you are still considered a minor. This is the case even when you decided to leave the city or state because most reports are entered into the NCIC which is a national database for those reported missing/runaway. It will stay active until you are either found or turn of age.

If your parents successfully file a runaway report, your parents can choose whether or not to press charges on another family that you’d be staying with for harboring a runaway, but only when they are not giving accurate information on his whereabouts. So basically if they were helping you hide from the police and covering up for you. That could lead to a number of different legal issues such as misdemeanor charges (fines or jail charges).

Only you know when you need to leave due to your home being unsafe. Unfortunately no one but you can make that decision for you, not even here. One thing that may be helpful for you is to possibly note when the fighting/yelling is happening or any triggers of the fighting/yelling (some examples would be like after your abuser comes from work or after dinner and/or right when you get home) and to try to find things that can keep yourself away from home during those times (after school programs, sports program, study group at a friend’s house, getting involved in your volunteering, etc). Since it’s only considered a statues offense and not a crime to run away, the only thing that would happen is that the police will pick you up from where you are and bring you back home. Then you would have to figure out how you're going to deal with being at home once again and how they might punish you for leaving.”

Hope that this helps you and if you need help in the future please give us a call.

[Guest]

My mom does not know who or where my gf is though. I keep my phone and laptop clean so she has no way of knowing. Of course I would have to get a new phone and disguise myself but no one would miss me and if the cops are close to finding my gf, I'll turn myself in immediately. And I would smash the sd card of my phone and my laptop. Just, how would I go about getting to her from states away? But if I can't get to her, I know a few people who have ran away in California so I guess it would be good to go to them instead

[ccsmod5]

Hi,

Generally, the best option to leave would be to get a bus ticket (or have someone else get you a bus ticket) or to get a ride from a friend or family member. If you have further questions or want to speak more specifically about your situation, feel free to give us a call at 1-800-786-2929. We are best able to help by phone.

Sincerely,

NRS

[Guest]

What is the quickest way for me to acquire money for the bus ticket because my mom refuses to let me work, even though our state allows it. I have absolutely no freedom at home and I haven't left the house in 6 months for anything other than school. I'm not allowed to have friends my mom doesn't approve of and she doesn't approve of any of them. I used to have friends until she saw messages on my phone and removed my texting and calling rights. Now I can only talk to one that still goes to the same school as me.

[ccsmod5]

Hi, it looks like you've reached out to us by forum before. Please consider giving us a call by getting to a public library or at school. Because of the large number of digital contacts we receive, we are unable to interact back and forth. If talking on the phone is an issue, we also offer a live chat on our website, 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.