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I'm 17, female, and want to move out without parental permission

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  • I'm 17, female, and want to move out without parental permission

    Hi, I am a 17 year old girl, wanting to move out without my parents' permission. I currently live in Louisiana.

    I will be moving in with my best friend and her family. They are middle class and all have steady jobs.

    The thing is, my mother doesn't approve of my moving out. Is there any way that I can leave without her permission?

    I've seen a lot of confusing answers for this, and many say emancipation, yet that involves either being in an abusive family or having one of my parent's permission. Neither apply to me.

    If someone would please help me with this, I'd be most appreciating.

    Thank you!

  • #2
    re: I'm 17, female, and want to move out without parental permission

    Hi there!

    Thank you so much for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We’re sorry to hear that you’re in a situation in which you’d like to leave home and we hope that we can help you through this the best we can.

    It sounds like you’ve done a lot of your own research regarding this already. What you’ve found regarding emancipation is more or less aligned with the information we have in our databases regarding it as well. Under our documents, youth located in Louisiana can fall under three separate circumstances in order for emancipation to become a possibility:
    1. “Parents are giving consent to the minor to become emancipated.”
    2. “In the second circumstance, a minor is automatically considered emancipated once married.”
    3. “In the third case a minor is declared emancipated by a judge. For emancipation a youth must be at least 16 years old. “
    We hope this has cleared up some kind of confusing regarding emancipation. It may be useful to know that make a case to be emancipated can be long and exhausting when requesting approval from a judge. Certain cases for self-suffiency are often needed and not all cases are approved.

    You can leave home without your permission, but in that case, your mom would have the right to make a runaway report. This is a status offense and means that you must return home upon being found by an officer or other legal authority figure. But this does not mean you would be charged with anything or arrested.

    Some other things to consider when leaving home are how you will be receiving food and money, how you will be able to transport yourself around, if you’ll be bringing a phone, etc.

    Other options youth sometimes consider to gain permission to leave home is thinking of people their parent’s may approve of. This can include distant relatives or family friends.

    We hope that some of this information helped answer some of the questions you had about leaving home. It’s always helpful to know that you do have options, and you are always welcome to call our hotline number at 1(800)RUNAWAY (786-2929) to explore those options, gain resources, or just to talk.

    Thank you and we hope you take care,

    The National Runaway Safeline
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      Im a 17 year old female and im trying to move out without my moms permission. I was living in her house but when she got a new boyfriend she started staying with him. I ended up being at my house almost by myself for 6 months. They are now married and im living with them again. We keep getting into physical fights and i feel like its a toxic. I have a job that pays pretty good for my age. I have a couple friends that are looking for a roommate and i can afford the payments there. Kinda stuck on what to do at this point..

      Comment


      • #4
        Reply: Im a 17 year old female and im trying to move out


        Hi there,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

        We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
        We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
        You are not responsible for others behavior. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
        You mentioned wanting to know how you can leave home before turning 18.
        We understand that might be challenging without her permission, however if there is abuse you have the right to file an abuse report with the police, a school counselor or child protective services.

        Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently.
        Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering. A time like this is most difficult.
        You did a great job reaching out today.

        If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
        Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

        We hope to hear from you soon.

        Be safe,
        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #5
          Hi I'm 17 and I want to move out with out my parents say so I want to move with my boyfriend he's 18 I live in ok
          Last edited by ccsmod1; 08-17-2019, 12:28 AM.

          Comment


          • ccsmod1
            ccsmod1 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hey there,

            Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. Running away is a big decision and it can be very stressful to figure out what you want to do. We aren’t legal experts here at NRS, but generally speaking, if you do opt to leave your home your parents can file a runaway report, which is essentially a missing person report. Running away is a status offense; this means that it isn’t illegal, but it’s something you can’t do while still a minor. If a runaway report is filed and you are located by the authorities you will most likely be returned to your parents. It should be noted that if the police were to find you at your boyfriends, he could be charged with harboring a runaway, which is a misdemeanor. Penalties for harboring a runaway vary from state to state, police officer to officer, and how your parents fell about the situation.

            If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

            Stay safe,
            NRS

        • #6
          Hello! I'm a 16 (gonna be 17 in July of this year) female, and I live at home with my mom and older brother and sister. I want to move out and live with my boyfriend and his family. But, I have seen you need permission from a judge to move out. I have worked before but not as an actual job. I was wondering if this could be possible at all without permission from a judge. Or from parents. Is this possible? Or do I have to wait.

          Comment


          • ccsmod2
            ccsmod2 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello There,
            Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen.
            We are not legal experts but we do have some information. If you were to leave to live with your boyfriend without permission your parents could file a runaway report. If the police do find you they most likely would bring you home. What you are probably thinking of is emancipation which usually a judge would decide. Emancipation can take anywhere from a month to a year, you can call your local court house to learn more.
            If you would like to talk more about your situation or would like to explore more options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support to you. We wish you the best of luck!
            NRS

        • #7
          Hi I am 15 years old and I'm November I'll be turning 16 my parents are mentally abusive and never can admit whenever there wrong they tear me down and treat me like a slave they buy me food and things I need but I can't live here no more I am getting depressed and hate it here I want to leave but I don't want to have to be emancipated since I'll have to prove I can do things on my own which I could but I have been offered to live with my boyfriend and his family since we've been together He is 17 and lives with his mamaw they have told me I can move in at any time and I'm always welcome I know how to cook wash clothes and take care of myself i do have 4 other sibling but they are not at all in my situation because I'm the only one with a long term relationship and being treated horribly is there anything I can do to get myself out of this home and into a one we're i am welcome and will be treated correctly? I truly need help and I don't wanna have to prove to a court that I can get a job and stuff because my boyfriends mamaw offered to help me with my needs which I don't necessarily need it I will be getting a job as soon as I can I do not want anything from my parents no money at all

          Comment


          • ccsmod15
            ccsmod15 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,
            Thanks for reaching out to NRS. It seem like you have been through a lot of verbal abuse at home and it’s starting to wear on you. Your parents shouldn’t treat you like a slave and constantly wear you down. It seems like you understand the limits of emancipation very well which is impressive. On top of that you have a place you have been offered that seems safe to go to.
            If you were to just leave right now though your parents could file a runaway report and police would be able to bring you back. Your boyfriends’ family would also be at risk of a harboring a runaway charge. That risk usually goes down if they don’t try to hide you from the police though. The only way you could go live with them legally is if you had parent permission to do so.
            If you haven’t already it may be worth looking into counseling or therapy for dealing with parents like yours. A school counselor could be a good first step in finding a resource like that. If they are responding to emails through the COVID stuff. Otherwise you can also reach out to our hotline or online chat and we can try to find one in your area.
            Hopefully this information is helpful in clearing up your options. We want you to know that we believe in you and we want to support you in any way we can. If you need to talk more, or have more questions please don’t hesitate to reach out to our hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

        • #8
          Hi I’m a 17 year old and my moms house is very verbally abusive and my dads house is okay but I’d like to move out on my own and start my life healthy. I live in Canada

          Comment


          • ccsmod6
            ccsmod6 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are living in an environment that is harmful to your mental health and it makes sense that you would like to try living on your own. Unfortunately, our services and information are tailored for the USA, so we may not have much to offer you. However, there is an organization just like us in Canada! It is called Kids Help Phone and they are reachable at kidshelpphone.ca as well as 1-800-668-6868.

            Take care,
            NRS

        • #9
          Hello I’m 16 years old (turning 17 in November) I want to move out, I live with my mother and her boyfriends, his two kids and my little brother. I’m constantly being verbally abused by my mother, she’s been doing this for pretty much my whole life and has abused me before multiple times I’m tired of living with her, and want to move with my boyfriend and his family

          Comment


          • ccsmod15
            ccsmod15 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,
            Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
            It sounds like home is pretty chaotic right now and on top of that you are dealing with the constant abuse from your mom.
            It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
            Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
            If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
            We hope to hear from you soon.
            Be safe,
            NRS

        • #10
          im a 17 and 18 in 6 months. my parents are verbally abusive and manipulative. i want to leave but i dont know what to do. emancipation would take to long in my case. and 6 months is to long to wait and stay at home. im unhappy and need a way out but i dont know what to do.

          Comment


          • ccsmod15
            ccsmod15 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            Thank you so much for reaching out to us. It sounds like you have been dealing with a lot at home. You do not deserve to be verbally abused or manipulated by people who are supposed to care for you. We are here for you to brainstorm, talk through options, and connect you with possible resources. We are not legal experts, but generally if a youth under the age of 18 leaves home without permission, parents/guardians are obligated to file runaway reports with the police. This means that if for whatever reason you ended up in police custody, they would most likely return you home. However, since you are close to being 18, it could be a helpful to consider reaching out to your local, non-emergency police line to see how they would handle your particular situation. We would be happy to call with you or for you if you gave us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or live chatting us through our website. We are here for you, and we hope to hear from you soon.

            Best of luck,
            NRS

        • #11
          I'm 18 in four months, and i want to move in with my boyfriend and his two friends. I have been in a verbally and physically home for the past two years. I don't have a job right now, but we all have a plan for as soon as i move in. I have planned on moving in the day i turn 18, but that's too far away.

          Comment


          • ccsmod6
            ccsmod6 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you have been living in an environment that is really unsafe for you and it makes sense that you feel you have to leave right now.

            While we are not legal experts, we do have a great deal of experience working with runaways. It is not illegal to run away. Your parent/guardian could file a runaway report on you but this would NOT mean that you would get arrested or charged with anything. It typically does mean that the police could return you home if they encountered you and that would be that. Some police can be more understanding about what is going on at your home. In our experience, police will oftentimes return the youth back to their guardian almost no matter what. Police typically do not actively search for a runaway youth. However, they will go where the parent/guardian directs them if they know where you are staying. Additionally, police can sometimes be more lenient about runaway situations the closer you are to 18. You can attempt to calmly, respectfully, and persistently deny them consent to touch you or take you anywhere, and they may give up on trying to return you home. They also may not, in which case you should comply with what they tell you to do for your safety.

            If you want to talk in greater detail about your situation, we might be able to provide you with some more precise information or guidance. Please don’t hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 or chat with us at 1800runaway.org.

            Take care,
            NRS

        • #12
          I just turned 17 and I live with my mom and her boyfriend and his daughter and I also have two younger sisters. I also have an older brother but he’s in college. My dad lives about 20 minutes away from us but I haven’t talked to him in 3 years. My mother is extremely toxic and manipulative. Over the years, she’s been so controlling that I feel so incredibly trapped and that I can’t do anything about it because she’s the parent, even though I’m more mature than her. She is very dramatic and she thinks she knows what is best but I’m falling apart and it’s all because of her. I have bad depression and anxiety and it’s all because of her. She’s been such a bad influence my whole life. She thinks she’s still living her teenage years. She is so mentally abusive yet she denies it. I just can’t live here anymore. I won’t make it another year. I’ve told her that I’ve had times where I wanted to kill myself and she just shipped me off to therapy and put me on medication. I can’t take it living here anymore. I want to move in with my boyfriend. He talked to his family about my situation and his mom is wanting me to move in with them. The problem is that I don’t think my mom will give me permission. I’m not 100% informed about the knowledge of getting emancipated in Minnesota, but I know I either need parental permission or I can get legally married as a form of emancipation. As a minor, I don’t necessarily see myself getting married as of now, so I’m out of choices.

          Comment


          • ccsmod2
            ccsmod2 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello There,
            Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a difficult time right now and we want you to know that you are not alone.
            We know you mentioned thoughts of suicide and we want you to know your life is important and you are worth living. If you are ever feeling suicidal you can contact The National Suicide Prevention Hotline at :1800-273-8255. There is always someone willing to listen and provide support, you are never alone.
            We are glad that your boyfriend’s family is willing to let you live with them and you have them for support. We are not legal experts but if you were to leave without permission it is a possibility a runaway report could be filed. If the police were to find you it is possible they could bring you back home. For emancipation in some cases you would need parental permission. You could call your local court house to get more info on emancipation.
            We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support. Best of luck!
            NRS

        • #13
          Hello I am 17 and I turn 18 in January. I live at home with my mother and my 2 brothers. This past week her boyfriend and his son got kicked out due to threats against me and my boyfriend. My mom has told me countless times that I'm ruining her life and it's all my fault. As of today she forced me to quit my job, get rid of my car and she is shutting off my phone. None of to which she has paid for in any aspect. She wont allow me to leave the house til I am 18 which is 3 months away. I've talked to an officer about how I do not feel safe here and they said legally there is nothing we can do. I have multiple people I could go live with right now and I'm not sure what to do. Where I am at in utah, emancipation wouldnt get taken care of soon enough for me to leave. I dont know what to do. I've gotten in touch with Safe Harbor and they started to file a CPS report. but it's nothing that would get me removed from the home. I am honestly so broken right now. And I cant handle being here any longer. Any suggestions as to what I can do? My mother won't consent to me leaving either.

          Comment


          • #14
            I'm 17 and I want to move out of my parents house. Does me switching between my mom's and dads count for something to help me get imincapated? Since my mom and dad are divorced

            Comment


            • ccsmod15
              ccsmod15 commented
              Editing a comment
              Hi there,

              If you'd like more information about emancipation in your state the best thing to do is give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat with us via our website: www.1800runaway.org.

              Hope to hear from you soon,
              NRS

          • #15
            Hi there, I am 17 years old and I live in Las Vegas Nevada an in the next month (November) I am turning 18 I want to move out really bad from my mothers house I don’t feel happy living here. I used to live at my dads house and I hated living there because they lived in a one bedroom apartment. I want to move to my boyfriends house because they can give me a much happier life. I have already spoken to my boyfriends mother about it and she is more than happy to allow me to move in. But the only problem is I am scared that my mother is going to call the cops on me an force me to come back. Can you help me think of what to do?
            Last edited by ccsmod4; 10-09-2020, 03:02 AM.

            Comment


            • ccsmod4
              ccsmod4 commented
              Editing a comment
              Hello,
              Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

              We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. In most states 18 is the legal age of adulthood which allows you to legally move away from your parent’s. We understand that it has not been the best situation for you living at home.

              We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
              Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

              Take care,
              NRS
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