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Hi, I'm 16 turning 17 in october (I'm a female) and I was wondering how I could run away or get away from my mom. She's abusive, mentally and physically, I ran away previous of march because I had a fight with her that ended up bad. I was also wondering if I could live with my step dad, i've lived with him since I was 4 and that was about 10+ years. My mom and him got divorced and he never legally adopted us, but I don't know if it'll be fine that I stay with him. Apart from that I've been trying to see if I could get away soon or somewhere around the time I turn 17, thank you if you help.
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Hi there,
Thanks for reaching out to NRS. That’s a lot to deal with. No one ever deserves to experience abuse of any kind and you deserve to be in a place where you feel safe and cared for. While we are non-directive and acknowledge it's not our place to tell someone what they should or should not do, we can do our best to walk through some options that may be available. One option you might consider is reporting the abuse you're experiencing to you local Child Protective Services agency or to Child Help (www.childhelp.org). We can also help you through that process if you want us to.
There are also some things that you should know before you decide to run away. While we are not legal experts, we have a general understanding of runaway laws. If you are under 18, your mom can file a runaway report and the police may return you to her custody. If you are staying with someone over 18 (without your legal parent/guardian's permission), your mom may also consider charging them with harboring (housing) a minor, so that’s something to keep in mind if you want to stay with your step-dad. Running away is a big decision, and it’s important to make sure that you have people who support you and a plan so that you can stay as safe as possible.
NRS is available 24/7 and confidential if you want to talk. You can reach us by phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or live chat on our website www.1800runaway.org if you want help working out a plan and deciding on the best option for you, finding resources, or even if you just want to talk to somebody.
We hope to hear from you soon.
Stay safe,
NRS
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Hi, im a 17 year old and i want to move out my dads house.
my dad is a heavy drinker, he doesn’t buy things for me that i need, and just recently he locked me out the house and refused to give me my medication. My dad told my grandma to come get me because he doesn’t want me anymore and i’ve been packing but i’m scared that he’s gonna try to stop me from leaving. But my dads house is very toxic. He also went against court orders to take care of me. What can i do without going to court?Comment
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Thanks for reaching out!
We know it takes a lot of courage to tell your experience and ask for help. That’s a lot for you to deal with and we’re sorry you have to experience that with your father and the toxic household. Due to you being under 18 years old, there are 3 options for you to leave your father’s house. The first is with his permission because if you leave without his permission, he can report you as a runaway and the police will have to take you back home. Is there a family member that may be able to talk to your father on your behalf? The second way is through Child Protective Services since you may have experienced neglect or safety concerns. If you feel that you can’t keep yourself safe in your father’s house, please contact emergency services immediately. Emancipation is the last option which you would have to show that you can support yourself financially. Emancipation can be time consuming and costly, but we can look into legal resources available for your state. If you have any questions about the options listed above or anything else, please reach out to us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or www.1800runaway.org.
We look forward to hearing from you!
Take care,
NRS
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Hi I’m 17 and I live in a toxic household I’m constantly getting yelled at for nothing and getting screamed at my parents constantly are lying to me and won’t let me do anything it’s so bad here for my mental health and my mom never understands how I feel about anything anymore I need out but idk how to get out
what can I do since I’m in PennsylvaniaComment
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Hi thank you for reaching out. That sounds like a very frustrating situation and that your parents are nonstop yelling at you and not considering what this is doing to your mental health. It sounds like you are not getting the support that you need at home. It seems like in PA, if your parents were to file a runaway report with the police that police will not force you to go back home unless you are in danger. Our recommendation is to contact the police department in your area to confirm that this is correct as all departments handle runaway cases a bit differently. If you were to leave, it is also important to make sure that you would have a safe place to stay. If you would like to talk more about this or some possible options, please either call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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Im 17 and live in arkansas. I will turn 18 in december, but I hate my home situation. My parents are awful and i hate being at home. I have money, a job and a safe place to stay. Could i just leave???Comment
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Hello,
Hello,
Thank you for reaching out to NRS with this difficult situation. It sounds as if you are a very independent person and would like things to improve at home. We are not legal experts, but in the state of Arkansas, you are not allowed to move away from home legally until you are 18. If you were to runaway, your parents could file a police report and a missing child report. If they do so and you get picked up by the police you will not be charged with a crime (unless you are doing something illegal) but you will be charged with a status offense. This means that you get charged with a status offense because it is illegal to runaway from home as a minor. The police would then be required to bring you back home.
There is a legal option called emancipation, but it is a long legal battle and if you do not meet all of the requirements, you will not win the case. Even if you meet all the requirements, those seeking emancipation might not win the case. Is there any way you can talk to your parents about staying with a friend for a bit to get some space or live with a safe family member?
These are some options you can consider. If you would like to discuss this further, we encourage you to reach out to 1800RUNAWAY or the chat option on our website 1800runaway.org.
We hope to hear from you.
Best of Luck,
NRS
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I need help . I hate my home and im 16 but turn 18 in december. My parents are awful to me. They are not even my real parents, they adopted me. Can I please just LEAVEComment
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Hello,
Thank you for reaching out to NRS. It sounds like you are dealing with a really difficult situation. We are not legal experts, but as a minor, in most US states, if you runaway you will be returned back home if your parents file a runaway report.
If you are planning on leaving, it is an option to talk to a friend, family member, or school personnel about different options they could provide to help you make choices that take your safety into consideration. Further more, it sounds as if you are really having a difficult time with your parents. An option is to reach out to the crisis text line at crisistextline.org or text 741741. This hotline provides mental health support in difficult moments when your parents are being awful to you.
We encourage you to reach out to NRS at 1800RUNAWAY or 1800runaway.org through the chat option. We can help you plan out a safe way and discuss what are some options you might have. We might be able to provide you with some resources in your area as well.
We hope to hear from you.
Best of luck,
NRS.
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Hi I just moved to Texas and I don’t have no information and law live in a hotel but my boyfriend grandma wants to take me in and I’m 17Comment
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(If you are in danger for any reason, please call the police or go to your local emergency room.)
Hi there,
Thanks so much for reaching out. It sounds like you might be interested in leaving home to live with your boyfriend's grandma. We aren't experts on your situation and we encourage you to reach out to us, but we'll do the best we can to share what we know.
If you have your parent's permission to live with your boyfriend's grandma, then you are free to do so. We would recommend getting their permission in writing in case they decide to take it back.
If you don't have permission, things look a little different. If you go stay with your boyfriend's grandma without your parents' permission, they could choose to file a runaway report with the police which means they'll find you and bring you home. You won't get in trouble with the police or arrested and running away isn't illegal, however you'll have to face any consequences your parents might have. Additionally anyone in his grandma's house over age 18 COULD be charged with harboring a runaway which is a criminal charge. This is uncommon and varies by state and situation, so it's worth it to check on this with your local non-emergency police. If you call the police within 24 hours of your arrival at her house to let them know you're safe, this can help avoid charges.
If you're being abused at home or need other housing resources please reach out to us as soon as possible.
We would love to share more information and help you make the plan that's right for you. We would be grateful to hear more about your story and give you more personalized guidance. The NRS is available 24/7 via online chat or by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We hope to hear from you soon, best of luck!
-NRS Crisis Team
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