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Are you considered a runaway if you are initially kicked out but asked to come back?

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  • ccsmod7
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on—it sounds like things at home have been tough. 18 years old is generally the age that an individual may leave home without permission from their parent or legal guardian. We are not legal experts here but we can speak in general terms. If you are under 18 and leave home without permission, your parent/guardian may file a runaway report with the police. What actions the police take once you are filed as a runaway can vary a lot from state to state and even city to city so we cannot predict exactly what would happen in your case.

    Generally speaking, if you encounter a police officer while reported as a runaway, you will likely be returned home. However, in that case there may be services (family counseling, etc.) available to you as a youth in crisis/runaway but again, police procedures related to offering those services can be different based on your location or the details of your situation. Another thing to consider is that while running away is not a crime, a legal adult who allows you to stay with them may be putting themselves at risk for being charged with harboring a runaway. One way to find out the laws in your area is to call your local police and ask what their policies are regarding runaway youth.

    If you would like to talk more in detail, please call or chat soon. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I’m in New Jersey and I’m 16, my mom kicked me out yesterday but I didn’t leave I just walked to my room… she never said I could stay just started yelling at me to go to school this morning. If I leave it’s not a crime even if I “run away” in New Jersey but would the police still look for me?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    Thanks for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. We're sorry to hear your sister-in-law is in an abusive relationship with her mom. That sounds pretty rough. Of course, she never deserves to be abused in any way and if she wanted to file an abuse report about what's going on she could always do that, either through local law enforcement or through www.childhelp.org (1-800-422-4453).

    The term "harboring a runaway" usually refers to when a person houses a youth under 18 who has run away from home and who has a runaway report already filed on them. It normally doesn't include very basic assistance like giving them food or just talking to them. So if the runaway is not actually housed by your parents, this doesn't seem like it would be considered harboring a runaway.

    We are concerned about your sister-in-law's situation, however. If we can be of any assistance to her or to you we are willing to help. The best way we can do that would be for you to contact our 24 hour confidential hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat with us via the chat feature on our website: www.1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.

    All the best,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My sister in law that is 15 years old is in an abusive relationship with her mom. Me , my brother dating her and my mom recently found out about what had been happening to her and we are trying to figure out how to help. the mom has hit/beat her and has told her very awful things and has even told her plenty of times to get out of their house, the daughter is scared to leave because she doesn't know what will happen to her if she goes back home, this has been happening for a long time she says and there is proof of her saying things to help and has marks of when the mom has hit her. the mom had one time told the dad and her to leave the house and they were but then the mom just threw herself on the ground and was begging them not to leave. The mom is a liar . we just want to know what crimes would be made in this situation, or will my parents be arrested for "harboring a runaway"? even if we aren't encouraging her to run away or hiding her? or will she have to go back one home once the police gets involved?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    replied
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    We hope to hear from you soon.
    Be safe,
    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    i’m 16 in montana, yesterday my mom told me to leave and not come back and then a day later she is trying to make me come home but i don’t want too

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thanks so much for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline. We’re really sorry to hear that you’re going through all of this. It sounds like a lot to deal with. You’re not alone and there are a variety of resources available to you.

    To answer your question: if your mom is your legal guardian (and even if she gave permission and then took it back) she could file a runaway report if you leave since you’re under 18. If your mom files a runaway report and the police find you, they’ll usually bring you back home to your legal guardian. We’re not legal experts, but to the best of our knowledge there are not usually many major legal repercussions for you as a runaway. However, if you are running away and staying at a friend’s house, there may be legal repercussions for your friend (or your friend’s guardians) for harboring a runaway.

    Again, we’re really glad you reached out to us. Good luck with everything. If you ever need more information or would like to be provided with resources in your area, we’re available 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY or if you’d like to chat you can visit 1800runaway.org. We encourage you to reach out anytime!

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    So I’m 16 I live in Indiana. My mom yesterday told me to get out of her house and live with my friends Because I’m over there all the time and continued to tell my friend who I’m constantly with to come and get me and they were going to but she told me to come back home or she would call me in as a runaway and so I came back home. Would I be considered a runaway and get myself in trouble and my friend who would be considered housing me? Or am I allowed to because she told me to get out and she even said she would pack my clothes and throw them outside for me. Two of my little sisters friends were here and witnessed her telling me to get out so can I leave and stay with my friend or would I get in trouble?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod13
    commented on Guest's reply
    We are glad you reached out to us for help. You are in a complicated situation right now and it makes sense that you want to take a break to alleviate your stress. It is totally understandable that you are hesitant to talk with your Dad right now.

    We would like to talk with you about some other options. You can start a chat with us through our website or call us on our crisis hotline at (800) RUNAWAY. Both are available 24/7 and both are completely confidential.

    After we talk and get some additional details, we will look at all your options with you and develop a plan that works best for you. We will find local resources in your community to help you execute your plan and support you along the way. Some options we will look at will be a conference call with you, your Dad and a liner from NRS; temporary transitional living for you; and state provided shelter and support.

    You have many options through independent and state programs as well as working out a plan to get back into your grandparents’ house. Legally at 17, your parents can not kick you out and the state has to provide shelter and support for you while they try to figure out a plan to get you back into the house or in another safe living arrangement.

    We hope to hear from you soon. Good luck.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm 17 and got kicked out by my mom about 4 weeks ago, she kicked my dad out a month ago and he lives with my grandparents. I live with him now and can't go back. My dad just kicked me out last night because we had a huge fight and he said I don't appreciate living in the house with my grandparents built. I have high-functioning autism and can't deal with this much stress, my dad has ADHD and can't control his temper. he said last night I have to live somewhere else, and he meant it. I don't know what to do now. I have a friend who is offering me to stay at her place but I don't think my parents will let me in someone else's house. I don't want to talk to my parents, I just want to take a break. I talked to my school counselor and she said maybe I should go back and have a conversation with him. But I don't want to see them right now and I also don't want them to call the police and say I'm a runaway or something. My life is really difficult and stressful. I almost got a job but my dad grounded me and took away some papers for my job. He made me a debit account yesterday and is going to cancel the bank by giving me a card. He said I'm not responsible, obedient, respectful, and trustworthy. I talked to a police officer and he said the same thing that my counselor said.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod5
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thanks for reaching out, we hope to help as best we can. When a parent or legal guardian kicks out a youth from their home, it is considered neglect which is a form of abuse. It is illegal for your mother to have kicked you out without having made arrangements for you, such as making sure you were safe at a friend or family members house. You could report this to Child Protective Services is you would like, reaching out to Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 or www.childhelp.org may help to get a better understanding of what may happen before and after a report is made. Another option is choosing to stay with someone you trust, you would not get in any trouble for staying elsewhere but if the situation is not reported your mother may try to report you as a runaway if she changes her mind. Still, running away is not a crime and you would not be in any legal trouble either way. If you have any other questions, please reach out to us via chat or call. We hope this helps!


    Stay safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My mother kicked me out saying she doesnt care about me and doesnt want me anymore, she has done this before but this time seems real. What can I do? Am I able to go stay with a friend. She said that I'm never allowed at her house again and my grandparents are letting me spend the week with them. I'm 17 gonna turn 18 at the end of the year

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod9
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for contacting NRS,
    We are sorry to hear you are going through some mental health issues caused by your family and extended family. You should not have to feel as though where you live is not a healthy environment. You mentioned needing legal options for the situation you find yourself in. Some things to keep in mind are that technically you are still considered a minor under the law meaning your parents have a say in where you can and cant go. If your parents agreed to let your grandparents take you then legally they have given consent to your grandparents to take you in. They dont need to sign a legal form just as long as they have given the okay to your grandparents to take you in. You mentioned that at your grandparent's place you feel as though it is very draining on your mental health. If those things involve mental, emotional or physical abuse you can choose to report child abuse either with us here at NRS or Childhelp (www.childhelp.org ; (800-422-4453) which is another organization that helps report abuse. Another option that might help get you out of where you're at is emancipation. Emancipation is a process through the courts that tell the state you are ready to be an adult before turning 18. This process requires you to seek out a lawyer and have things set in place beforehand like a job, place to live (that isnt your parents), being able to finish school, or even things like bills (insurance, phone bill, etc.). We can help find you those types of lawyer if that is something you wish to do.

    We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am 16 years old, my parents kicked me and my 18 year old sister out but now say that they agreed they want me to go back home. My grandmother does not have legal guardianship of me but had permission from my parents and has been taking care of me ever since. I do not want to go back home as it’s caused me many mental heath issues and the household is very toxic. I would like to know what my legal options are.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there. Thanks for contacting us here at NRS. We know that it can be difficult to see someone we care about having a tough time, and we commend you for trying to determine the best ways to offer support.

    Generally speaking, if a minor is kicked out and ends up going elsewhere, if at any point a runaway report or missing persons report is filed (or mom just says they have to come home), they may find themselves in a position where things get a little sticky. Unfortunately because situations like this can be full of nuances, it's probably in A & C's best interests to connect with a legal professional for support to ensure each potential issue is appropriately considered and addressed.

    If you'd like to chat more about the situation or encourage A to do so, please feel free to reach out to us directly by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY or by chat through our website at www.1800runaway.org. We're available 24/7 and are always happy to listen, and to help.

    Take care.

    NRS
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