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16 in need of help

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  • 16 in need of help

    Hello, I have a very odd situation and I am in need of assistance. I don't know how to go about any of this, and it's very complicated, so please bare with me .

    In mid/late 2016 when I was 14 my mother passed away .My parents were divorced, and my biological father is manipulative and abusive. My step father was able to convince him to let me stay home. It was also stated in my mother's will that if she were to pass before I turn 18, I am not to go to my father and I am to stay in the guardianship of my step father. This will was notarized legally. Here's where problems arise.

    Last year in February, my step father began to act very resentful and angry with me, to the point where multiple times I would call my grandparents to come and take me to their house for a few days so I could get away from him. In April of that same year, his girlfriend and her two children moved into our home which was already full. Right now we have a nine year old, ten year old, twelve year old, fifteen year old, myself, and a nineteen year old living with the two adults. It is very crammed and very aggravating living here. The two new step daughters are treated far better than I. My younger half siblings (8 and 10) are treated fine, I'm really not sure what it is about me that deserves the treatment I receive. The only thing about me that changed was I became depressed when a new woman was in the house when it hadn't even been a year without my mother, and I wasn't asked if I was ready for this to happen. The eldest of the two step daughters treats me like second class and she gets anything and everything she asks for no matter what. I won't say I'm not jealous, but more than that I'm tired of it.

    I would go and stay with my grandparents, but my grandmother now has terminal cancer and I am sure they do not have the time to take care of my as they both are still in the work force. I refuse to go live with my biological father, because as I said, he is abusive mentally, and occasionally physically.

    I have other places I could go, but I am worried authorities would return me to the home I want to get away from. I don't want to go about this unintelligently, and end up right where I started. I can wait until I'm 17, but after that I can't take it anymore. It's already been a year and I'm not who I used to be. I know I need to get out of this situation. Can you help me?

  • #2
    Hi there,

    Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We understand that it takes a lot of courage to reach out and we want you to know that you deserve to feel safe and happy in your home. We are not legal experts, but we can tell you that because you are a minor, if you leave home and your parents file a runaway report, you could be returned home. There could also be legal consequences for whomever you stay with for what is called harboring a runaway. If you want a liner to help you walk through other options like us mediating a conference call between you and your parents, thinking through possible adults that you could turn to or could advocate for you, or things like emancipation and legal aid numbers, don't hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We are 24/7 to listen and to support.

    You also mentioned wanting to leave your home before you are 18. One thing you can do is reach out to your local police to inquire how they handle runaway reports for 17 year olds. Some cities and departments treat them differently because a 17 year old is so close to becoming a legal adult. The way to get the most accurate information would be to call your local police non-emergency number and anonymously inquire about their practices. If you need help finding this number or you want to walk through any of the options listed above with a liner, don't hesitate to give us a call. We could also look up possible shelters or safe spaces for you if you do decide to leave.

    Stay safe,

    NRS

    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

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