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Is it illegal to runaway when you're 14? what can happen?

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  • #91
    help

    I have been thinking of running away for years, last year it got so bad I got arrested for trying to get out of my dad's house and some other stuff went down but now I can't even get a say in anything that happens and everything just comes back to me and I'm the ignorant one who just doesn't care about anyone except myself. I don't know how to deal with this. They don't let me make any decisions anymore. It gets so bad I just don't even want to live with my dad anymore and I almost ran away last night and this afternoon. I don't know what to do.

    Comment


    • #92
      Re: help

      Hello,

      Thanks for reaching out to us. It sounds like you are in a really difficult situation, and it can be hard to figure out what to do when things like this are going on.

      So to answer your question in the title of your post first. We cannot give specific legal advice, but when you are a minor your parent or legal guardian has the authority to determine where you live. So it’s not illegal as in being a crime, but the police can get involved and can take you back to your legal guardian’s house. But a lot of other things can influence that. For instance, if you are being abused or neglected the police might be able to help. Letting them know what is going on might help. The most important thing is your safety.

      But let’s say you choose to continue living with your dad, are there ways of making this situation better? It is so frustrating not to have a say in anything and be blamed for everything bad that happens, and I wonder if there is any way you can talk to him about this. 14 is a tough age to be – you are not still a child but people often treat you as though you are. You have enough sense to make some good decisions for yourself but those around you don’t always realize this. On the other hand, if there is someone who understands what is going on and can give good advice, that can help you through the really tough times and help you figure out answers to problems that you haven’t met before.

      We understand that there is nothing worse than someone telling you what to do all the time and not listening what you have to say. Is there a way to talk to your dad when the situation is not stressful –not when you are in the middle of a fight—and talk to him about the frustration you are feeling? Perhaps you could say you are open to talking about what is going on and would listen to what his concerns are if he listens to you. You might be surprised and get a positive response. Just something to think about.

      You could also try calling us at our hotline number – 1 800 RUNAWAY (786 2929) - and we could talk through your situation. We are confidential, and here 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

      Best,
      NRS
      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

      National Runaway Safeline
      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
      Tell us what you think about your experience!
      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

      Comment


      • #93
        Twisted emotions

        My mom really has just been driving me crazy. She is being quite unfair in my offence, she will say stop playing and yell at me when it's my brother thats really playing and she SEES who it is but targets me.

        Just today she was explaining chores and she said I have a bad body language, WHEN I DID WAS SIT IN A CHAIR.

        My brother who is just eight has punched me in the nose before I told him to get away and went to tell me mom but... She got mad... AT ME.

        I have been talking to Someone I knew on a game on a kind of social media on whether to just be gone for like a month, but I just can't decide no more.

        Comment


        • #94
          Re: Is it illegal to runaway when you're 14? what can happen?

          Hello,

          Thank you for reaching out. It can be very difficult to ask for help and it was very brave of you to do so. It sounds like it is very frustrating for you that your mom tends to take your brother’s side. It’s great that you are trying to be responsible and figure out what your options are.

          We are not legal experts, but if you were to leave and your mom made a report, you may be brought back to her by the police. Some things you may want to keep in mind is where you will stay if you decide to leave. If you want to discuss your situation more you can always call our hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

          Thanks again for reaching out to us. It sounds like living at home has become very stressful and upsetting for you. It is great that you are trying to figure out what is best for you. Again, if you ever want to talk you can call us anytime at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We are here 24/7 365 days a year.

          Best,
          NRS
          Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

          National Runaway Safeline
          [email protected] (Crisis Email)
          1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
          Tell us what you think about your experience!

          https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

          Comment


          • #95
            My best friend ran away

            My best friend ran away from home and we are trying to figure out what to do. Any advice?

            Comment


            • #96
              Re: My best friend ran away

              Hi there,

              Thank you for reaching out to us here at NRS through out online forum. It seems you are looking for advice on what to do regarding your friend whom you stated ran away from. While we cannot provide direct advice since we are non-directive, one of the most important things to think about is your friend's safety and well-being. Also, it may help to think about the reason behind your friend leaving such as it being a safety issue at home. If your friend has been at risk of harm from a parent or other adult, they have the right to inform police and Child Protective Services. We can help provide support, understanding, and even resources (such as shelters for safety, legal aid, or child abuse reporting hotline numbers) to help keep your friend safe.

              It sounds like you care a lot about your friend, and it's great to hear someone is looking out for them.

              If you or your friend would like to talk more about the situation they are in as well as explore some helpful, safe options please reach out by phone or chat soon.

              Best,

              NRS
              Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

              National Runaway Safeline
              [email protected] (Crisis Email)
              1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

              Tell us what you think about your experience!
              https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

              Comment


              • #97
                unloved, uncared

                So I live with my mom and my sister. My mom loves me but I'm not sure about my sister. She's always saying she hates me and no body likes me and I will never find anyone that loves me. And she makes me believe it myself. Then I have to choose sometimes if I want to go with my dad or mom. When I pick my mom my dad says don't love him and don't want to spend time with him and I won't care if he dies. And of course I do. But he is so strick a lot of times I question if he really loves me. Then at school I of course always pick the boys who will never love me, to love. It hurts so bad and they don't even notice. I have considered running away but I have big plans for my future. I can't quit school because I need to finish college, and I'm only 12. Then I think about, what if the police find me, I would be in a lot of trouble and that's just what I need! I started cutting about 3 months ago, my mom found out, now I go to a therapy thing. But I miss cutting and I almost did it again last night. I don't even know what to do any more

                Comment


                • #98
                  Re: unloved, uncared

                  Hey there,
                  Thanks for reaching out to us. It sounds like you’re dealing with a lot of complicated feelings and situations right now and we want you to know that you’re not alone. We’re sorry to hear that your sister is being so unkind to you. Everyone deserves to be loved and her saying that is wrong and untrue. You also mentioned having to choose between your parents and that sounds very difficult. It sounds like you love your dad and it’s not fair of him to say those things to you even if he doesn’t mean them literally. Have you guys talked about how this upsets you? Concerning your relationship with boys – it’s great that you can be open to liking or loving someone else and it’s tough when it’s not mutual. We’d be happy to talk to you more about how things are going at school and home so feel free to give us a call any time at 1800 – RUNAWAY (1800- 786-2929). It’s awesome that you’re thinking about your future! That’s very mature and forward thinking. It’s great that you’re getting support from a therapist but if you’re thinking about cutting you might want to check out To Write Love on Her Arms https://twloha.com/ They are a great organization that’s dedicated to presenting hope and finding help for people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury, and suicide. You are being very brave and if you ever feel like you’re in a crisis or need someone to talk to please don’t hesitate to give us a call. We wish you the best and hope to hear from you soon!
                  Best,
                  NRS
                  Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                  National Runaway Safeline
                  [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                  1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
                  Tell us what you think about your experience!
                  https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                  Comment


                  • #99
                    I Wanna Runaway

                    Hi, Ive Been Mistreated, Touched. By One Of My Family Members. Nobody Belives Me. Im Failing In School &&; Have A Really Hard Time. Someone Told On Me For Doing Vape &&; There Gonna Question Me. Im Scared. My Parents Will Get Very Mad, Yell At Me &&; Become Abusive. At This Point Im Always So Depressed. Self Harmed &&; Tried To Suicide Many Times. I Just Wanna Run Away As Soon As Possible.

                    Comment


                    • Re: I Wanna Runaway

                      Hi there,

                      Thank you so much for reaching out to us. It is really brave to ask for help with such a difficult thing but we’re really glad that you were brave enough to do so. We’re here to support you.

                      You shared that you have been mistreated and touched by one of your family members, and disclosed that your parents will become abusive. You do not deserve any of this and we are so sorry to hear that you have had to go through this. You do not deserve any of this and it is not your fault that it has happened. We believe you. There is another line that may be helpful to you, too: RAINN at (800) 656 4673. You have the option of reporting abuse, which we can talk more about if that’s something you think you’d want to pursue. Another resource that can assist is Child Help USA at (800) 422 4453.

                      You talked about how you have been depressed, have self-harmed and tried suicide many times. These are all very difficult things to be going through alone. The National Suicide Hotline is a hotline that’s available 24/7, just like us, to talk through any of these feelings along with you. At the National Suicide Hotline they have trained counselors ready to help. They also offer chat, which you can access here: www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org.

                      You have been through so much. We’re here to listen and here to help you work through your options and come up with a plan that works for you. We’re not here to tell you what you should or should not do, you know your situation better than we do. We just want to help keep you safe in whatever you decide. Please do not hesitate to call or chat.

                      Best,
                      NRS
                      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                      National Runaway Safeline
                      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
                      Tell us what you think about your experience!

                      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

                      Comment


                      • I want my life to change!!

                        Hello,
                        I'm a 14 year old boy and I want to runaway because I want my life to change. All my friends at school talk about sex and all kinds of crap. My friends have turned me into an extreme pervert. All I can talk about is sex and I want to stop! I've tried to stop but I just can't! I've heared that camping is a good way to get rid of problems but I would only be able to do that on the weekends and that's not enough time to get rid of my problems! If I do runaway I plan to go to another state (I live very close to the state line) and camp out at a city park for a night then move 50 +/- miles away to a state park that offers camping, fishing, kyaking, ect. ( I know how to fish so I would be able to catch my own food ).I really want to change so I don't turn into a sex offender or something worst....

                        Comment


                        • Re: I want my life to change!!

                          Hi there,

                          Thank you for reaching out to us through our online forum here at the National Runaway Safeline (NRS). It sounds like you are uncomfortable with the thoughts you are having. You shared that because of the topics your friends speak of, you feel it has taken control over what you think about. It sounds like it's been a challenge to focus on other things in your life, and it seems you are frightened about what it means, and you fear these thoughts may turn into some more severe if you don't get any help. You took a good first step in acknowledging the uncomfortable and scary feelings and by reaching out for help. We are here to help in any way we can. Sometimes talking about what you're experiencing can help gain insight and normalcy. You may also receive validation that what you are thinking of may be normal, or if it is concerning then you may be able to talk to someone who can help change your thoughts and refocus. We can locate resources in your area for counseling so that you may be able to share these thoughts with a mental health professional who can help you change the way you think and react to topics regarding sex. If you would like to try a search on your own, you can visit SAMHSA 1-877-726-4724 http://www.samhsa.gov/treatment to locate a behavioral health and treatment center closest to you. It may also help to talk to a trusted adult or even a healthcare professional such as your primary care doctor so that you may get a referral to teen/adolescent counseling. Another resource for teens about sex and sexual health is called Sex, etc. http://sexetc.org/

                          Again, if you needed help finding resources that can help with controlling your thoughts, we would be happy to provide you with those resources. Please consider reaching out by phone, chat, or email with our city/state so that we can identify some resources for you.

                          We wish you luck and hope to hear from you soon.

                          Best,

                          NRS
                          Last edited by ccsmod6; 03-02-2016, 07:03 AM.
                          Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                          National Runaway Safeline
                          [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                          1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                          Tell us what you think about your experience!
                          https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                          Comment


                          • I'm 16 and done with this ..

                            I am 16 & I've been mistreated with word from my mom because of my sexulitty I told her not to long ago that I'm bisexual and she doesn't really accept it she always trying to bring me down .. By telling me how bad and distgusting it is she really wouldn't care if I was to runaway she said it be better if she didn't have to face the dissapointment I've become .. I really do wanna runaway ? But I'm wondering will it be on my record ? And how bad can it become ..I'm only planning on leaving for a week or maybe less I just need to get away and try to actually be happy .?

                            Comment


                            • Re: I'm 16 and done with this

                              Hi, and thank you for reaching out to NRS. We’re sorry to hear that you’re in such a tough situation. No one deserves not to be accepted or to be told that you are a “disappointment”, no matter what the situation. It’s understandable that you want a break to try to be happy, and that running away may seem like a solution.

                              So you asked if running would be “on your record”. In most states it might be just a status offense (not criminal in nature); but there’s something you might want to keep in mind: “harboring a minor without parental consent” instead is a crime (a misdemeanor) – so if your parents find out where you are staying and make a police report, whoever is helping you could get in trouble.

                              Have you already thought it through, like do you have plans of where you would stay, or how you would make ends meat to survive? I’m glad that you contacted us, it’s actually very hard to make it on your own in the streets.

                              If you’re being mistreated, it sounds like it would be good to get you out of the house; and you mentioned that you’re thinking about leaving just for a few weeks or less. That could make it easier; would there be a place for you to stay that your parents would agree to?

                              Have you thought about talking to them about it with someone else, like another adult that you trust and that they also respect? We would like to help, if you think a conference call with both you and them on the line could be useful. In any case, please feel free to call us anytime (1-800-runaway), since you have such a tough situation going on. We are here for you, and we want you to be happy.

                              Best,
                              NRS
                              Last edited by ccsmod16; 03-14-2016, 11:17 PM.
                              Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                              National Runaway Safeline
                              [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                              1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
                              Tell us what you think about your experience!
                              https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                              Comment


                              • Re: Is it illegal to runaway when you're 14? what can happen?

                                Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                                I need help. My parents are driving me insane, they dont understand that i am a teenager and constantly abusing me with their words. I need to get out of here, i have many places that i could live in, but will i get in trouble?
                                I feel the same way.

                                Comment

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