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Is it illegal to runaway when you're 14? what can happen?

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  • I need help I'm in foster care but I don't want a family because I have never had one before I have either homeless or at "family" that had physically/mentally abused me and I don't want to be in this foster home or any home at that all I've done is ******** things up and I don't know what I'm doing anymore my psychosis is ruining my life I can't handle being around other people please help me (sorry this was wrote fast )

    Comment


    • ccsmod2
      ccsmod2 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      We're sorry to hear that you are unhappy with your foster home. It sounds like you feel responsible for what's going on and you want to get away. We can't help you to leave home and run away to another place, but if you need to talk things through we are here for support.

      Take care,
      NRS

  • wow, i feel really stupid writing this because my situation isn't nearly as bad as others but you just keep telling people who to call what is the actual punishment for running away. i'm 13 and its not really my dad he's the cursor and only hits things when he's angry. my mom she's the violent one shes hit me throws my phone at me she even tried to choke me once. she pinches my ears until they turn red and hurt a lot and she's never really there for me. Im actually adopted and i don't really have anywhere to go but i guess i dont need help i would just really like to know what would happen if i ran away could i ever have to be taken back? thanks

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thanks for reaching out. It shows a lot of courage and responsibility to seek help when you think you need it.

      You mentioned that your mom has been violent with you multiple times and that you feel like you aren’t being supported by her. No one deserves to be treated like that, and we would like to give you some resources if you need help dealing with your situation. You mentioned how we tell people to call which is often the case so that we can help people to the best of our ability. If you are unable or uncomfortable to call, we also offer Live Chat starting today at 4:30pm CST.

      There is also organization called Child Help that is specific to child abuse, and they may be helpful to you (1-800-422-4453 /childhelp.org). Just so you know, The National Runaway Safeline and many other resources like us are what are called “mandated reporters.” This means if we get identifying information from you like your first and last name, or your address, then we have to file an abuse report based on any information you have given us. If you would not like for this to happen, then we would be happy to speak with you anonymously. If you would, however, want to file an abuse report, we can talk with you about that and complete the process with you over the phone.

      Also, you asked about the consequences of running away. We are not legal experts, so we do not know how the laws are written in your jurisdiction, however, we can give you some general information. Running away is typically not a criminal offense. It is most commonly a status offense, meaning that the courts have decided that you are too young to live without your guardian. If you were to run away, your parents could file a runaway report on you, meaning that if the police ever found where you were staying, or if you committed a crime and they came into contact with you, then they would likely take you back home. If a runaway alleges that there is abuse at home, then the police may take other courses of action, but what those actions are is generally up to the police to decide.

      Again, thank you so much for reaching out to us. We appreciate that you felt comfortable asking for help and hope that the information and resources provided will benefit you. If you feel like you could use our help again, whether it is for finding resources or emotional support, you can always feel free to contact us. We are 24/7 and confidential.

  • I can't do this anymore. My friend just committed suicide. No one will help me. It hurts. Everyone say to stay strong. How the ******** can I be strong when my only friend has just committed suicide. I literally put a gun to my head and wanted to pull the trigger but I couldn't do it. So I just started to self harm. None of my family helps me. No cares for me. I'm being called worthless,useless and a nothing. I want run away. Its not like my family will notice. I'm sorry to say this but...I want to die. I can't ********ing do this.anymore.....

    Comment


    • I am 14 and im planning on running away to my cousins, taking two trains and two buses.
      I have gone there before by public transportation but my mom would always set me up for tickets. Right now, i need space for thinking, since my mom just invaded my privacy, reading my book where i write all my emotions and caught me talking and crying to myself since thats the only way i can fully let out my emotions and thoughts. She is always curious and i understand she wants to help. I just dont want to tell her my emotions and i dont want her to help- not cause i care of her, cause shes always doing extra stuff, forces me to let out my emotions and doing things she think that will help but clearly not doing ********.
      Its me and her in our house. My dad and mom isnt divorced or anything, he is just being a manwhore, sending dick pics behind my moms back and is very abusive when he gets drunk. He usually never becomes drunk though. its clear that my mom and dad dont like eachother. I dont like my dad either.

      3 months ago, i started cutting. I felt so much ******** and i have recently thinking about hurting myself more than that. Although two months ago my friend convinced me to stop cutting and i haven't had any sort of blade near my skin since then. Nowadays i dont have tears, i just cant cry. I cant express my emotions and its driving me insane. I didnt think i could cry everynight, but i did. I thought it just was a saying but its more real than the ********ing cruelty of this world.
      All i want, is just a break from my family. I just feel like everything needs to stop and i need to think. And the ones who are so close to me right now is my cousins. I can tell them everything, cause they live so far away. Its like having a tiny chest you can tell everything to, and once you're finnished, it will fly away to another galaxy or some ********.

      I need your thoughts on this. Since i really cant stay in the same city as my mom right now. Thank you.

      Comment


      • Reply: I can't do this anymore #185

        Hello,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline.

        Losing a friend or loved can be emotionally devastating.
        No one can tell you how to feel or how long it might take to cope with such a tragedy.
        We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing what you have been going through to some extinct. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things around you right now.
        It even sounds like you have considered suicide if things don’t change. Your safety and well-being is important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

        The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255); www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org is also a great resource to reach out to in addition to our crisis services.
        Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

        This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. Sometimes it can be helpful to have the support of family and friends.
        Unfortunately it seems that has not been the case for you. Your feelings are important and you deserve to be heard.
        NRS is here to listen and here to help. NRS wants you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.

        If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

        We hope to hear from you soon.

        Take Care,

        NRS
        Last edited by ccsmod4; 03-17-2017, 03:23 AM.
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • I need help were should i got to run away

          Comment


          • ccsmod2
            ccsmod2 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi,

            Here at NRS we don't help youth to run away. If you do need help with resources or information you can give us a call or chat with us. We are here to help and support in any way we can.

            Thanks,
            NRS

        • Iam in a treatment place that is residential. Im off probation and can leave anytime, according to court. What will happen if i just leave.

          Comment


          • ccsmod6
            ccsmod6 commented
            Editing a comment
            It’s great that you’re reaching out to us and trying to figure out all of your options! It sounds like you no longer want to be at the treatment place you’re currently at and are considering leaving. Are there any particular reasons you’re considering leaving? Also, have you given thought to where would you go if you leave? You’re really brave to reach out and it’s smart to consider factors like probation. However, without knowing more information regarding your situation, it’s difficult to guarantee what would happen. Therefore, if you feel comfortable doing so, we would recommend you consider calling us directly at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) to walk through your options further. With more information, we could then provide you with more detailed next steps. If this sounds like a good option to you, we are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and again our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We hope to hear from you soon.

        • Someone needs to help me. I can't do this anymore. If death won't be a way out maybe running away will. I was raped for 3 months by my uncle. Flashbacks, broken heart, shocked just everyone. Failing school. I'm slowly dying. Nobody's here for me. Ever. My own parents wanted to cover it up since I told my social worker. Why is my life like this? I'm not a survivor. Im finding a way out of this hell. It's like I'm living this nightmare, but I'm never waking up from it

          Comment


          • Reply: Someone needs to help me. #189

            Hello,
            Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline .

            We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now. It sounds like you’re fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change. You did not deserve what happened to you nor is any of this your fault.
            Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
            Your safety and well-being are important. If you are feeling at risk or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

            The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255); www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org is also a great resource to reach out to in addition to our crisis services.
            It sounds like you have a social worker you have been seeing. Good for you.
            Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of.
            This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support, to listen and help.

            Coming forth and reaching out tonight took courage. You have demonstrated you have the strength to survive.
            If you would like to talk more about your situation please call or chat soon. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

            We hope to hear from you soon.

            Take care,
            NRS
            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

            National Runaway Safeline
            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

            Comment


            • Hi im thinking about running away im 14 but the reson why is bc my dad and his girlfriend that has 4 kids i hate it there one of the kids beat me up and his girlfriend just sits there and watches and yells at me what would be my consiquences

              Comment


              • ccsmod15
                ccsmod15 commented
                Editing a comment
                It’s awful that you are going through that. Everyone deserves a safe and supportive environment. It makes sense that you’d want to leave, since one of your dad’s girlfriend’s kids is beating you up, and your dad’s girlfriend is not doing anything to stop it. On top of that, it must be difficult to deal with this new bigger family.

                The most important thing is that you are safe. So, if you do decide to run away, it’s helpful to break the step into it’s parts, and come up with a plan that way.

                First, consider where you might go. Think about if there is someone you trust who could support you, or give you a short term place to stay. And note, this doesn’t have to be running away. Sometimes guardians approve of a youth living with a relative or one of the youth’s friends for short or long amount of time.

                If you are traveling, also think about how to stay safe. Think if you have someone you could get in touch with easily who could provide support if you get into a difficult situation.

                Also, consider if there are ways to make this situation better without running away. Think about whether reaching out to your dad about the situation might be a help. Also, we have family counseling resources we can refer you to if you call us, if that’s a help.

                It seems like one issue you are facing is this new big family. Think if there are other family members or friends who you can vent to and talk to if you are feeling alone or misunderstood.

                Lastly, since there’s some physical abuse from one of your dad’s girlfriend’s kids, and she is not doing anything to stop it, you could reach out to Child Help USA anonymously. You could explore whether child protective services could help in any way, without committing to anything. Their number is 1-800-422-4453.

                Thank you for reaching out to us. We’re so sorry that you’re going through this.

            • PLS HELP ME
              I live in AUS and i really want to run away even though I'm 14.

              Me and my parents are NOT close. Im like a stranger to them. My dad doesn't give a single damn about what i do and my mum hits me and threatens me. Ive heard of a thing called emotional abuse and THAT is exactly what my mum does to me. She calls me names and all that stuff and leaves me behind when she goes out. She likes my little brother more and she climes I'm "too detached" and thats why she doesn't love me. I would have run away by now but i want to study to go to uni and get a career and thats whats holding me back. My mum says that she wished she never had me and that id become a stripper when I'm older. and i infuriates me. please help me i want to run away but i want to still want to study. SOMEONE ANYONE IM BEGGING YOU PLEASE HELP ME!!!

              Comment


              • ccsmod2
                ccsmod2 commented
                Editing a comment
                Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are in a difficult situation, and we understand it takes courage to reach out for help. The National Runaway Safeline is located in the United States of America (USA). Our knowledge of helpful community based resources and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. If you are located in a country outside of the USA, you can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: http://www.childhelplineinternationa...where-we-work/
                We here at NRS are non directive, and are unable to help youth to run away. We hope that by reaching out to a local resource, you are able to get the support you need from an organization that understands the laws and circumstances that affect youth in your country.

            • I live Washington with my mom which is drunk most of the time and blasts music and is variable and sometimes physically​ abusive I want to live with my brother in Idaho how do I do it my brother said he would take me in he has a stable job and can take care of me I would live with my father but he passed a while back my brother is the only family member that truly cares about me what can I do to live with him could I runaway to his house and have the police have CPS contacted from his house? Or something​
              ​​​​​​

              Comment


              • ccsmod2
                ccsmod2 commented
                Editing a comment
                Hey,

                You seem like you are unhappy at home since your mom uses alcohol and has been abusive towards you. It's understandable to want to leave home to stay with a relative. However, we are not legal experts and we are non directive here at NRS. We are unable to tell you what you can do legally. We do know that in general if you are a minor and you leave home, your mom can file a runaway report for you and potentially make you go back home. Your brother could also possibly be charged with harboring a runaway. If you wanted to live with your brother legally and permanently, you would most likely need to get CPS or police involved. They would have to decide if your home is unfit and then make arrangements for you to live with another person. You could have your brother help you look into possibly getting custody of you. You would need to contact a legal resource or non emergency police for more information about the laws in your area.

                Best of luck to you,
                NRS

            • ok so I'm 12, my birthday is july 20. I have a plan set up to leave home. I hate life. either i leave home or the earth as in killing myself. If I have good reasons to leave, and get caught- my mother won't love me,my family will disown me. If I don't want them and they don't want me, will I go in a foster home? Or juvnile detention? I've never done anything bad that would make cops think I'm a bad kid. I'm depresseed. I hate life. I hate me. I really have to get out of town. Where would they stick me?If it's a juvenile detention, how do I convince them otherwise?What will my life be like after I get out of foster care and/or juvenile detention?

              Comment


              • ccsmod14
                ccsmod14 commented
                Editing a comment
                Hi there,

                Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we are glad you reached out to us with your questions.

                We’re sorry to hear about the treatment you have been dealing with at home. You deserve to be in a safe and supportive environment.
                While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.

                Unfortunately, we do not provide advice because of our non-directive approach but we do try to come up with some options that fit within the realm of the law. For example, because you mentioned having issues at home with your parents, we offer a conference call option where we facilitate a conversation between a youth and their legal guardian to discuss issues at home and come up with some agreements. Sometimes a close family member or family friend can do this in person to help communicate some of the feelings you’ve been having. We also can provide some resources to organizations as well like community centers that offer family counseling or free legal assistance.

                You also mentioned feeling depressed, sometimes it can be helpful to talk to someone about it. Talking to someone from the Suicide Prevention Lifeline might be helpful for you, their number is 1-800-273-8255. We are also available 24/7 as a resource and could provide some additional resources more tailored to your needs. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you would like to talk more in depth.

                If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

                Be safe,
                NRS

            • how much trouble will i be in if i runaway? i am only 14.

              Comment


              • ccsmod3
                ccsmod3 commented
                Editing a comment
                Hello there and thanks for reaching out on our forum. It sounds like your main focus is finding out how much trouble you will be in if you run away. Please bear in mind we are not legal experts; however, our general understanding is that running away is a status offense. This means that it is not illegal per se, just as a minor you aren’t able to leave home without permission. Instead, the laws may fall on any adults hitting you. We’re here if you’d like to continue discussing your situation and your plan. Please feel free to try out our Live Chat starting today at 4:30pm CST. We hope you’re able to stay safe and wish you the best of luck!

            • so i want to runaway from home beacuse my parents are abousing me with their word and threating to beat me and i got my emo stuff taking away and i cant wear no makeup all beacuse i got intruble at school and some of my stuff i packed away and i dont know where to go i need help and sometimes i just want to die

              Comment


              • ccsmod8
                ccsmod8 commented
                Editing a comment
                Hello there –

                Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. We do want to say that it must be very hard for you to have to go through all of this. It sounds like a very stressful situation for you at home. No one deserves to be treated like that at all. Just know that you always have the right to report any abuse (physical, mental, sexual, or neglect/abandonment) to your local police department or child protective service in your state. You have rights too. If calling out to child protective services is something that you don’t really feel comfortable with doing, you can always give us a call to help answer any questions about the process or to walk you through what steps there are. We can also help you file if you’re worried about doing it alone.

                It sounds like you might some specific questions that you want to ask us about running away or just want to vent about what was going on. It’s hard to talk to just anyone one about what has been going on. Please rest assured that we are completing confidential. So anything that you share with us will stay between us. We certainly want to help you. If you give us a call on our 24/7 hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) we could help you find resources in your area and could potentially help you brainstorm a possible solution to the issues you are having. We would love to talk to you. Or you can also read throughout out public threads here on this website to find out what we know about the runaway laws. It's always going to be your call as you do our best to remain non-directive her at NRS.
                Last edited by ccsmod8; 04-25-2017, 01:17 PM.
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