16 Year Old wants to move out/emancipation in New York State

[Guest]

I'm 16, almost 17. I live in New York with my dad, his girlfriend, and her son. i want to live anywhere but with them. There's constant arguing going on in the household and being there stresses me out more than anything else. On top of that my dad just isn't supportive at all and gets mad about small things making living with him miserable. I have job and my license, along with a car that's about to be put on the road. My best friends mom said i could stay with her instead of living at home. Is this still considered emancipation? And if so, can I do it?

[ccsmod7]

Hello, thank you for reaching out to us. We are sorry to hear about your current situation and we will do everything we can to help. It is understandable that you are looking to live on your own and get away from a negative household. It is not fair to you that your dad is not supportive and gets mad at you for little things, you do not deserve to be treated like that.

Considering your options, it sounds like you have a safe place to go to with your best friend which is awesome. The only issue that may come up might be getting your dad to agree with letting you live with them. Although we are not legal experts here at NRS, if you did decide to run away we would like to provide the information that although running away is not a crime for you to commit, harboring a runaway could potentially get your friend their mom in trouble if your dad decides to press charges. Although this is not a for sure outcome we just want to make you aware of the possibility. It is so great that you have a job, a license and a car, it sounds like you are pretty independent. We looked up some information regarding the state of New York’s stance on emancipation and discovered that “In the state of New York, emancipation is referred to as ‘the renunciation of parental rights to a child.’ Although New York does not have a formal statute for acquiring emancipation, the minor can acquire emancipation if they are legally married, is in the armed services, is able to establish an independent home, or if the parents have failed to fill their parental obligations.” So it seems you might be able to acquire emancipation since there is no set law on it in New York. If you are ever in need to make a plan, want more information, resources, support or guidance then please do not hesitate to call us at 1-800-786-2929 we are confidential and available 24-7.

Again, we’re really glad that you reached out to us. It takes a lot to ask for help and you are trying to figure out your options which is really good to see. If you would like to talk further about your situation, please do not hesitate to call or chat with us. We’re here to listen, here to help.

[Guest]

I’m 16 and I love with my aunt but I no longer wanna live here anymore if I leave would I have to come back

[ccsmod15]

Hello,

Thanks for reaching out to us. We’re so sorry to hear that things aren’t working out with your mom. It sounds like you have questions about possibly leaving her home without having to return. It takes a lot of maturity to ask for help, and we’ll do our best to share information that might help you decide your next steps.

We’re not legal experts, but from what we do know, if you are considered a minor in your state, you would need the consent of a parent or legal guardian to live outside of their home. If you leave without their consent, they can report you as a runaway with your local police department and, if found, the local police would likely return you to your parent or legal guardian. If you feel that you would be able to support yourself, an option for you might be emancipation. It’s important to keep in mind that emancipation often involves having to navigate your state’s court system, and that could mean spending a considerable amount of time and money on the process before achieving emancipation. If you’d like help finding more information on how runaway reports work and/or emancipation, please feel free to reach out to us.

Whatever you decide, we want you to know that we are here to support you. We won’t tell you what to do, but we will do our best to help you stay as safe as possible as you take steps towards your goal. You can reach us 24/7 by phone at 1.800.RUNAWAY (786.2929), or by clicking the CHAT button when visiting our website, www.1800runaway.org . We’re here to listen, here to help. Stay safe!

-NRS

[Guest]

My girlfriend is 16, i’m 16 shes been staying over here for the past week, her grandmother(legal guardian) has told her that if she doesn’t stay there during the week, she will give up custody on her. her parents won’t take custody, but we are in New York State so would it be possible for her to live with me without my mother having to take custody of her?

[ccsmod2]

Hi there,
Thanks for reaching out to NRS. We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like the situation at home with your mom and dad is causing you stress. It was very responsible of you to reach out. We’re here to listen and here to help.

The easiest way to leave home as a minor is with your parents’ permission. In this case, they would be allowing you to live somewhere else where you are safe and being cared for, it’s called an Alternative Living Arrangement. If your parents give their written permission, you can live with someone else (a relative or family friend, for example) until you turn 18. Sometimes having an adult advocate on your side can make communicating your needs more effective to your parents. Perhaps an adult family member, a friend's parent or a counselor at school can talk to your parents with you about your experience at home and the possibility of you leaving.
Generally speaking, your parents are your legal guardians until you turn 18, so they can decide where you live. If you do choose to leave without permission, your parents can report you as a runaway to the police. Running away is not illegal, but it is a status offense. This means your parents can have the police return you home.
We truly want to be a support for you as you decide on your next steps. We are available 24/7 to listen and help as much as possible. Please do not hesitate to reach out again by phone or chat if you would like to talk more in-depth about your situation and explore your options. You can contact us by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org.
Best of Luck,
NRS

[Guest]

My girlfriend is being abused by her step-dad a lot like it’s a dayly think and she’s always degraded by her mom and step-dad shes 16 is there anyway she could come live with me and my mom? I’m also 16.

[ccsmod1]

Hey there,

Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It's great that you are so supportive of your girlfriend and are actively advocating for her! She absolutely should not be treated that way, no one deserves to be abused. Of course, if she is in immediate danger we encourage you or her to call out to 911. Your girlfriend the right to report the abuse to child protective services. If she feels like this is an option she wants to explore, she may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help her file a report if that’s the route she's considering.

If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you and your girlfriend may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

Stay safe,
NRS

[Guest]

It’s April 2020 and right now I know for a fact you can no longer get emancipated in the state of NY. They did away with that along time ago. No matter what your age is NY doesn’t do that for anyone any more. Just want to put that out there. You can look it you call as a lawyer but it’s true. No one can even file for that anymore. They don’t take those cases in court in NY they did away with that.

[ccsmod2]

Hello There,

Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, and expressing your concerns.
We appreciate you letting us know about the emancipation process in NY. For each individual the emancipation process is different. We a not legal experts but in some cases you can still become emancipated in New York.
If you have any other questions or would like to see what other options are out there please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support.
NRS

[Guest]

I am 16 and I live in new york. I live with my mom and my step father. My step father drinks all the time and gets loud and starts arguments with my mom sometimes. I have a boyfriend that's 16 and he lives with his mother. I want to move in with my boyfriend but my parents won't let me because they don't like him. He lives in a safe environment and him and his mother want me to move in with them also. Were I'm living now I'm being used and I'm treated with no respect. I do not have a job but once I'm able to move out I plan on getting one. My boyfriends mom has a job and is willing to take care of me. Cps is involved right now and was called on my step father. If I move in with my boyfriend will I or my boyfriend get in trouble in any way? Will I legally be aloud to move out without parent consent?

[ccsmod15]

Thank you for contacting us. First, we are so sorry to hear home is a difficult place for you right now. You deserve to be respected and cared for and it's not right you aren't getting what you need from your family. It sounds like CPS is already involved, but if you want to make another incident report you can always do that. Sometimes multiple reports causes CPS to take the situation more seriously. But it's totally up to you. You can file through us or through Child Help at 1-800-422-4453 (www.childhelp.org).

Keep in mind we are not legal experts and no one can say for sure what may or may not happen if you proceed with your plan. What we do know is this: unless CPS has removed you from the home, you would need your parent's permission to live elsewhere, legally speaking. They have the right to file a runaway report on you and anyone you stay with could be accused of harboring a runaway, which is a misdemeanor.

So, here are some options to consider:

1) You could ask permission from your parents to live elsewhere
2) You could talk to the CPS agents currently involved with your family and get their advice on the matter
3) You could take steps towards getting emancipated early

On this last point: emancipation means you are freed from your parent's guardianship. To do that before 18 you would have to get a lawyer and go through the court system to prove that you can take care of yourself.If you want more details about emancipation in New York you can direct your questions to Brookhaven Youth Bureau at 631-451-8011.

We hope this information helps. If you'd like to talk about other options you may have (or just vent) feel free to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat with us online at www.1800runaway.org. We are confidential and here 24/7.

All the best,
NRS

[Guest]

Hello, I am a 16 year old who constantly fights with my mother for not wanting to be religious like her and follow her rules. I have been dating my boyfriend for quite some time now and when my mom found out she was furious. She would treat me terribly and sometimes not feed me because she was angry to talk to me. My father would take her side and my mother just yells at me all the time for everything. I have three younger siblings and they repeat all the bad things my mom tells me and make me feel terrible. Both of my parents do not let me leave my house and have me controlled. I am not allowed to talk with anyone. I have been wanting to move out because I feel terrible living with my parents and want to have liberty. I have a stable job and have been saving up my money to leave. I have recently found a place near my boyfriends house. He would like for me to move in with him but I rather live alone for a while. I was wondering if I could just leave at any moment. I have expressed moving out to them but they do not take me seriously. Could you help me?

[ccsmod0]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS

Please click the link below to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

[Guest]

im 16 and i really hate living at my parents and i want to leave but i want to be by myself what would i have to do?

[ccsmod13]

Hello,

Thank you for taking the time to share a post on our Bulletin. It sounds like you are thinking about leaving home, but you are looking to do so in a way that would allow you to be fully independent. While we are not legal experts we can speak generally. This sounds like you are describing emancipation. Being emancipated means your parents are no longer responsible for you and you are granted all rights of an adult in order to live independently before reaching the age of majority (18 in most states). Emancipation can be a lengthy process. The criteria for an emancipation case to be considered generally include that you are already living separately from your parents, you are able to financially support yourself, and you can show that emancipation would be in your best interest. To learn more about the process or how to file a petition, it is recommended that you speak with a lawyer or an advocacy group. We can connect you with legal aide in your area and help you explore your options, if you call our hotline at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at 1800runaway.org.

We wish you the best,
NRS

[Guest]

How do I move out at the age of 16 without having to deal with authorities due to emotional and mental abuse and not being able to stay at home because the longer I stay, I feel like I will finally kill myself for sure this time. I don’t want cps involved. I just want to leave and stay with a reliable friend over 18 and not have them be reported for housing a run away.
What do I please?
Please reply fast.

[ccsmod4]

Hi there,

You mentioned wanting to know how you can leave home before turning 18. The easiest way to leave home is with your parent or guardians permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to them. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern.
Though we understand you might not want to get them involved we wanted to mention it as an option. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
If you would like to speak more about your situation please contact NRS at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or www.1800runaway.org (Live chat).

If you are feeling depressed or having suicidal thoughts we encourage you to reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255



Take care and be safe,

NRS

[Guest]

Hi my fiancé is paying child support for his daughter which is now 20 years old she has moved out of the house now just wondering how do we stop child support she no longer lives at home and is not going back home can you please give us some advice thanks New York State

[ccsmod15]

Thanks for reaching out to NRS,
We are not legal or child support experts, as we specialize in crisis services and general information. We would recommend starting either with finding legal aid, or contacting your local CPS or DCFS department for help navigating this issue.
A good starting place for legal aid would be www.lasmny.org which is the Legal Aid Society of Mid-New York.
Thanks again for reaching out and good luck,
NRS.

[Guest]

I'm turning 16 in august and i want to be emancipation from my adopted mother. we always yelling and physically fighting all the time and I'm so tired of it I just want to just get emancipated we're not happy and we always hurting each other's feelings I just want to be on my own so I could just be happy and I have other family members who I used to live with before and I just I don't know what to do and I need your help so please tell me what I should do.

[ccsmod13]

Hi there,

Thanks for taking the time to write us here at NRS and we appreciate you sharing a bit about your situation. It can certainly be stressful when the adult in the household is not supportive and if there is constant fighting. It sounds like you and your mom have a very tense relationship and this is making things at home incredibly overwhelming. You deserve to be treated with respect, to feel listened to, and to feel at ease where you are living.

Generally speaking, your mom is your legal guardian until you turn 18, so she can decide where you live. The easiest way to leave home as a minor is with your mom's permission. In this case, she would be allowing you to live somewhere else where you are safe and being cared for. A helpful step is to start reaching out to friends and family members you might be able to stay with. Sometimes having an adult on your side to advocate for you can make communicating your needs easier. Perhaps an adult family member, a friend's parent or a counselor at school can talk to your parents with you about your experience at home and the possibility of you leaving.

The other option you mentioned was emancipation. Emancipation can be a lengthy and difficult process, and in some states you have to be 16 before you can start the process. To be emancipated and gain the rights and responsibilities of being a legal adult (renting an apartment, enrolling yourself in school, working full time, supporting yourself, etc) you will need to show in court that you are able to live independently and financially support yourself. If you would like to talk more about starting this process and the criteria, we can connect you with legal aid in your area. You can call us at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services and we would be happy to find resources for you.

We truly want to be a support for you as you decide on your next steps. We are available 24/7 to listen and help as much as possible. Please do not hesitate to reach out again by phone or chat if you would like to talk more in-depth about your situation and explore your options. You can contact us by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org.

Stay safe,
NRS

[Guest]

hi im 16 years old and I have a baby and im currently living in a 60 day crisis shelter but I am being told from my acs worker was that I have to go home because I haven't been removed from my home and I feel like she is not doing her role as a acs worker. When she came to my home she gave my mom 2 hrs to sober up and came back when she was sober and then now that im in this shelter im being discharged from here in a week and I want to know my rights as a child .

[ccsmod13]

Hi there,

Thank you for taking the time to contact us here at NRS and we appreciate you sharing your situation with us. This must be a really tough spot for you to be in and it is definitely frustrating that your ACS worker is not doing more to advocate for your needs and communicate with you. You deserve to feel supported and to feel safe.

Generally speaking, your mother is your legal guardian until you turn 18 and she would be able to control where you live. You have been very brave by working with ACS for the last couple months and advocating for yourself. It sounds like you are in a temporary shelter while ACS has conducted an abuse/neglect investigation with your mom. Child welfare services or ACS in your state, generally has a goal of reuniting youth with their families whenever it is safe to do so. They are supposed to provide you and your mom with a safety plan and the services necessary to make sure your needs are being met. It can be scary to think that this might not be the case for you or that you are not getting enough of a say in where you live. It could be worth a try to ask your caseworker about a safety plan or ask how she can make sure you are being supported even if you return home. Some examples of this could be counseling, substance abuse treatment for your mom, or asking if they will help you talk to your mom about agreeing to an alternative living arrangement. A helpful start could be to reach out to friends or family members who can provide you a safe place to live. The challenge is that your mom would have to agree to this or ACS would have to take the step to remove you from your mom's custody.

We truly want to be a support for you during this difficult situation. We are here to listen and help as much as possible. You can reach out by phone 1-800-786-2929 or through live chat 1800runaway.org to talk more about your situation and explore your possible options.

Stay strong,
NRS

[Guest]

Hi, I am a 16 year old in New York who is looking to get emancipated from my mother. My dad is not in my life because he lives in another country, but he does pay unofficial child support. I have a part time job and am a junior in school. My mother has agreed to emancipate me. She is mentally abusive to me, and understands I would be better living alone . I would either live in my friends house as they agreed to let me move in. Or I would get an apartment with money I saved up

[ccsmod4]

Hello,
Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We are sorry to hear about the situation of abuse from your mom. You don’t deserve to be treated badly. It’s not your fault that this is happening. It sounds like you have the makings of a plan to better your situation. Good for you.

We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

I'm 15 and turning 16 in three days, my mom is now pregnant and the father is an alcoholic. I am now living with my grandparents for the time being till my mom gets a house with the boyfriend but I still feel like I'm in the situation even though I'm not in it right now. I want to be able to live on my own and go to school and have a normal life. I don't want to live with my grandparents nor my mom. Also my dad is out of the picture. I don't know who to get emancipated, pls help.

[ccsmod15]

It sounds like you are interested in emancipation. We are not legal experts, but we can help you get a general sense of how emancipation works. Our general understanding is some states offer formal emancipation statutes while others do not unfortunately. Laws vary depending on your location, but in many states a minor can petition the court for emancipation to take responsibility for their own care before they turn 18. Generally speaking, courts are wary about granting emancipation. In most cases, you would have to prove in court that you have an income and can care for yourself financially, and that you are able to live separately from your parents. It also helps to be in good standing at school. The court will also factor in the mental and physical welfare of your parents in order to establish your best interest. Usually your legal guardian would have to agree to this in court. Once you are emancipated, you can legally choose where you live, but you might still find that you cannot sign a lease or build credit until you turn 18. The emancipation process can take several months or up to a year, and may cost money in the form of court fees and other expenses. Usually, the best way to learn about emancipation in your state is to contact a lawyer. You may also find information at your county family court. We can look up legal aid resources that may be able to help you with the process. Please do not hesitate to call or chat if you have questions, need legal resources, or need to talk. We can explore your situation, go over all your options, and come up with a plan and resources to deal with your situation over the phone or on live chat. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.

[Guest]

Hi im 16 and i have been getting abused by my mom for years and my older sister is saying i can live with her would i be able to

[ccsmod1]

Hey there,

Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. You do not deserve to be abused in any way and it your mom's actions raise concern for your safety and well being. f you are currently at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. If any harm or abuse is happening at home, you have the right to report it. If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering.

It also me beneficial for you and your sister to speak with a legal aid group about the possibility of her petitioning the court for custody of you. If you need help locating a legal aid group near you you can check out https://www.lawhelp.org/find-help/.

If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

Stay safe,
NRS

We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think