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Want to live with my mom but dad won't let me

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  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My parents were never married so they aren't divorced but they have had split custody over me my whole life. I really want to live with my mom full time because being at my dads really affects my mental health in a very bad way. I'm 15 and I'll be 16 in about 6 months. Another issue though is my dad had another kid (my half sister) and I can't imagine leaving her alone in that house. So I have thought about just dealing with it and staying at my dads, but I'm afraid my mental health will get so bad that I end up doing something that could've been prevented if I just stayed at my moms. I was planning on telling my mom about this but last time I did she just ignored the subject.

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  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    We hope to hear from you soon.
    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    how can I live with my mom my parents hate eachother and I miss my mom and brother so much I just want to see them

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  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon. We unfortunately are not legal experts so we do not have the answer to your question. We can help direct you to some legal resources if you call or chat with us!
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    We hope to hear from you soon.
    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I’ve wanted to live with my Dad for almost a year now, I have lived with my Mom since I was 2 and I am now 16. I lived with my Dad for 3 months when we were planning on relocating to Colorado, my Mom seemed fine with it till last minute she said I can’t go. We have now been in court for the past 8 months with no progression. I am not allowed to know the details of court nor can I talk to anyone in the court system. Is there anything I can do to make this go faster?

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  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,

    Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We are very sorry to hear that you are experiencing such a difficult time with you dad. School is hard, especially online school, and it sounds like you could really use some encouragement and support at home as you navigate this challenging time. You certainly do not deserve to be verbally abused for any reason. You’re actually to be commended for seeking help…that takes a lot of courage.

    It’s challenging to switch schools but, if you are able to identify a teacher or counselor, early on, that you feel comfortable with, you might consider talking to them about what you are going through, both at home and academically. You’re a new student, and they may have support services to help you transition or to help with tutoring. Teachers really appreciate students who ask for help; it shows initiative.

    You talk about going to live with you mom. If you aren’t aware of the details of your parents’ custody agreement, you could ask your mom to explain this. It might help to know the legal guidelines if you want to pursue this option. This could also make her aware of what you are going through with your dad, if she doesn’t already know.

    You can always contact us at NRS either by phone, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or on a live chat through out website, www.1800RUNAWAY.org. Both are available 24 hours a day/7 days a week. We can look for helpful resources in your area or work on coping strategies with you. NRS also offers a conference call service in which we will mediate a call between you and your parents. It allows you to set some ground rules, and we can make sure the conversation remains civil and on topic. We are here to listen and to help. We hope to hear from you soon.

    Take care,

    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    im 14 and i want to live with my mom. My dad curses and threatens me and says im gonna end up dead in the ghetto or commit suicide because im a quiter just because i have bad grades, my dad and my stepmom put me and my little stepbrother in a private school and i barely passed my middle school last year which was a public school and im trying to explain to him that im not ready for this school because this is a private school and i have 8 classes and he's been verbally abusing since 5th grade im in 8th grade now and last night he called me a disappointment and thats why i want to live with my mom she's the best mom i could ask for and im doing online school too so she doesnt have to drop me off to school every morning i really dont know what to do.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there. Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know that it can take a lot of courage to reach out for support, and we're glad you took that step. It sounds like things at home with your dad are pretty challenging, and we're sorry to hear that. Based on what you've shared, it's understandable that you've been thinking more about living with your mom. Is this something that you've talked about with her at all? If not, it might be a good idea to try and have a conversation with mom about how you're feeling and opening up to her about what's going on at home. If she's aware of how you're being treated, she might try and figure out a way to have you live with her sooner than later.

    Because you mentioned some abuse in the home, and that your dad is a drug addict and alcoholic, we also want to let you know that filing an abuse report with Child Protective Services (CPS) is an option for you as well. CPS will likely conduct an investigation to try and determine what's going on at home, and help figure out what steps need to be taken to ensure that you're safe. To file a report with CPS, you can do it on your own by searching your state and CPS agency. Once you locate them, their website will instruct you on how to file a report. You can also talk to a teacher or a school social worker about what's going on. They have an obligation to file abuse reports and can do so on your behalf. You're also welcome to call or chat with us here at NRS. We're Mandated Reporters as well, and can file a report with you, or for you--whatever you're most comfortable with.

    If you'd like to chat more about what's going on at home, discuss some of your options, or learn more about filing an abuse report, please feel free to reach out to us directly by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY or by chatting with us at www.1800runaway.org. We're available 24/7 and are always happy to listen, and to help.

    Take care.

    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi. I'm 14 and I really want to live with my mom.

    I only visit her during the summer and Christmas break. I live with my dad the rest of the year. I hate it there, I get yelled out for stupid things, and he is verbally abusive and at times physical. He once put me up to the wall and choked me. My mom has been trying nearly all my life to get me to live with but, it never worked out. My dad is a drug addict, a alcoholic. And when he gets drunk he gets angry. He blames my mom constantly , and says that it's her fault I'm here. My brother use to live with me but he turned 18 and left. Ever since then, I feel weak... I can't do this anymore. It hurts my mom to see me leave. And I just really want to live with her. My dad lies to me saying that he will let me live with my mom but never truly let me. Plz.. I just want to live with my mom

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  • ccsmod15
    replied
    Hey there, Thanks for reaching out for help. We can’t imagine how difficult this is and you are so brave to reach out to us and talk about your situation. What your teacher is doing is not ok. You deserve to go to school and class without fear of being taken advantage of. It’s understandable you are afraid to tell anyone. It can be hard to tell your parents about what your teacher is doing at school. We offer a conference call service if you would like some help speaking with them about it (1-800-786-2929). If it would be easier to tell someone else before your parents you could try another teacher or a counselor at school. Another option of someone to talk to is contacting RAINN (rainn.org or 800.656.4673). They are the nation’s largest anti-sexual violence organizaton. You can call and speak with a trained staff member from your local sexual assault service provider. They also have a chat option if you would feel more comfortable talking that way. Again, you are very brave to speak out and ask for help. You did nothing to deserve this. If you want to speak more about your situation and the options you have, call or chat with us anytime, 24/7 (1800runaway.org). We are here to listen, here to help. Good luck!

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi I have a problem. I’m 15 years old. So, my teacher keeps keeping me after class, for no reason, and he tells me to take off my clothes. He takes off his, and then he starts kissing me, and playing with spots he shouldn’t. I want to tell my parents, but I’m afraid they might get the wrong idea... please tell me what to do... I don’t want to call the cops.....

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thanks so much for reaching out to NRS. It sounds like you’re feeling angry and overwhelmed, and you have every right to be. The behavior from your mom you are describing is considered physical abuse, and it is never okay. No one deserves to be treated like that. You have the right to tell someone about this abuse so they can help your mom stop. A good person to tell is a teacher or nurse at school, or you can call a confidential hotline called Child Help at 1-800-422-4453 and they can answer your questions about abuse and help you report it if you choose to. And if you ever feel like your mom is about to hurt you, please call 911 and they will send someone to help right away. It can be incredibly hurtful when a parent treats a brother or sister differently than they treat you. It’s understandable you’d be feeling frustrated with how unfair the situation is. While your mom has taken a positive step by staying sober, that does not mean it’s ok for her to abuse you. You deserve to feel safe and cared for at home. We at NRS are here for you any time at 1-800-786-2929 if you want to talk more about your situation or explore resources in your area like counseling or youth shelters.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I’m 11 years old, and my mom hits me and punches me in the head, and slaps me, and hits me in the head and butt with a metal spoon.
    she’s 1 year sober, so it’s not like she’s drinking or anything. She just scares me sometimes. My little sister seems like she’s moms favorite, and it’s not fair. She never gets hurt by mom or sent to her room. All she does is eat chips, and dr. Pepper. Mom just hurts me and lets her get away with EVERYTHING. would this be considered abuse?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
    While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
    We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by forum to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I need help I want to live with my but my dad let me I’m 15 and my parents are separated not divorced just living their separate lives I hate it at my dads house I just want to live with my mom but my dad threatens to call the cops if I do my dads been to jail several times and is a convicted violent felon, would the police really take his side? I’m terrified of my dad and rlly don’t want live like this can someone please help?

    Leave a comment:

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