17 year old can't handle emotional stress from parents

[Unregistered]

I'm 17, and I live in Missouri. I recently moved out/got kicked out of my home. My stepmom literally hates me. She makes me clean EVERYTHING. She tells me that I can't go anywhere unless either the house is clean or if my siblings are going somewhere too. Recently, I got a boyfriend. My stepmom liked him at one point, but then she started to hate him because I would go to his house occasionally, and also because he doesn't do every single little thing she tries to make him do. I have been so stressed lately, because all she does is yell at me and my siblings for bothering her and her friends during magic games and stuff, and everything else. Right now I am staying with my boyfriend, because my parents and I were fighting one day and I couldn't handle it anymore. It makes everything worse on me because I've recently had two deaths in my family. My parents haven't even made an effort to call me since I left. My stepmom is known to push people away then invite them back when she wants something, like a clean house. Plus her children are lazy. In any event of the police being called, would I have to go back, or would there be a loop hole to where I could just stay here? My boyfriend is 19 and plans on getting an apartment for us to live in.

[ccsmod12]

Re: 17 year old can't handle emotional stress from parents

It sounds like you are going through a lot right now and we are so glad you reached out to tell us a bit of your story. You mentioned that you and your step-mom do not get a long and you recently left/were kicked out of your home. It’s good to hear you have a good support in your boyfriend and it sounds like ideally you would like to live with him. It seems your concern is that you are still 17 so you are not sure if your parents can make you return home.

17 is a tricky age. In most states age of majority, when you are considered an adult and can leave home, is 18. But depending on how close you are to being 18 and where you live, police may deal with this situation differently. Do you feel like if you moved out your parents would be okay with it? It’s difficult to say how each city/state police will deal with every situation so it may be helpful to contact your local police on a non-emergency line and just ask if they take runaway reports or make a youth return home if they are under 18.

Keep in mind you can also always reach out to us as well. We are a confidential hotline and if you want to talk with someone immediately you can always call our 24 hour hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or you can utilize our live chat which is available from 4:30p to 11:30p CST. There is always someone here to listen and here help. Take care.

[Guest]

My son is 17 and I went thru his room and found some stuff he shouldn't have had and the day before he lied to me about something he wanted to sign up for I gave him the money and it was a complete lie. I found the sign up sheet in his car. He got mad at me said I violated him he lives in our home and pays no bills and I knew something was up. Z he said he did t want to live here anymore so I said leave and he ran away. My heart breaks because I do love him but hate the behavior and choices he is making. Tuff love is hard and not sure really what to do.
he has everything...
but I have taken the car away and cell phone closed.
any advice

[ccsmod16]

Hi, thanks for reaching out! It sounds like you’re having a tough time with your son and now with him gone, it could be a scary situation.
In most states your son is still considered a minor, so you could call the local police and see if you could file a runaway report. Some no longer accept reports for someone so close to legal age, however. The police do not normally go out looking for youth unless they have reason to believe he is in imminent danger. But if they come in contact with him, they have to return him home. Other options could be contacting friends or anyone who your son may be with, since he no longer has a working cell phone.
If you want to explore more options of what you can do about your son’s behavior or need any resources such as counseling, feel free to call us. We are here 24/7—1-800-786-2929. This is understandably a difficult situation for you. If you need support for yourself, you can call Team HOPE (help offering parents empowerment) at 1-866-305-4673. All the volunteers are parents and family members who have been in similar situations with runaway or out of control youth. Best of luck in finding your son and please let us know if we can help any other way!