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Can I move in with my brother?

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  • Can I move in with my brother?

    Hi, I'm 15 almost 16 and I live in Oklahoma. my dad left me when I was young and I have been living with my sister brother and mom since then and my mom shoves religion and political beliefs down my throat but I am completely against her and because of that I am pretty much an outcast. I don't really want to run away but she treats me badly (mentally not physically) and my brother realizes this (he's 22) and wants me to move in with him at his new house but I know my mom wouldn't let me. so is that illegal for me to live with him since he is family and a legal adult?

  • #2
    RE: Can I move in with my brother?

    Thanks for reaching out to us, it is very great of you to seek for help. Hopefully the information we provide you will guide you in the right direction. We understand how frustrating your situation might be, specially your mom trying to push her beliefs on you.
    We are sorry to hear how things are at home, no one should be treated this way. Have you ever tried talking to anyone about what goes on at home, aside from your brother?
    We are not legal experts, but we can speak generally and running away is not illegal, however since your mom is your legal guardian she has the right to file a runaway report and if the police find you they will return you home. Although moving in with your brother could be a good idea, it all goes back to your mom being your legal guardian and you would need her permission to be living with your brother.
    Hopefully this answer is helpful for you and if you have more questions or want to talk to someone directly you can give us a call anytime at 1-800- RUNAWAY (786-2929). We’re 24/7 and open all 365 days a year. Good luck!

    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!


    • #3
      I need to move out and my brother said in could live with him. I live in Washington and I'm 15. My brother is 18. He can finacially support himself and me. I can't emancipate myself cause I can't get a job because my parents wont let me out of the house. I get mentally abused and my step dad has been dangerous. I've felt unsafe in some ways. My brother ran away and can agree this house is not suitable for me. Can I run away to his house?


      • ccsmod6
        ccsmod6 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hey thanks for reaching out! We want to do what we can to help. It sounds like you are having a tough time at home and want to do what is best for you. It is great that you have brother for support who really understands the situation you are in. While we are not legal experts, it is not illegal to runaway and you will not get in trouble with the law if you runaway however, if your parents were to file a runaway report, your brother can get charged with harboring a runaway. If you want to know more about your legal rights or help with the emancipation process, you can call Northwest Youth Services at 360-734-9862.If you would like to report the mental abuse that you have experienced you can reach out to Child Help at 1-800-422-4453 or at . If you have any other questions or if we can help out in any other way feel free to reach out by calling us at 800-786-2929, emailing us at [email protected] or chatting us at . Best of luck!

    • #4
      Hi I'm 15 and I'm about to be 16 in April, but my mom left me and my brothers at a young age and well ever since I been living with my dad but now that he found himself a girlfriend none of us live together anymore, my older brother has his own house(he is 19) and well my other old brother(he's 17) lives with one of my dads friends and well me I'm stuck with my dad, and well I really want to move with my brother but my dad doesn't let me and well I was thinking what if I just go and move in with him and i was wondering if it would be illegal to do that but then again I think it's not because he is my brother and well I feel more at home with him then I do with my dad, my dad doesn't want to admit that he only wants me to be with him because of his lady, other than that he just wants to send me to bootcamp and well I don't understand the point of that because all I really want is to live with my older brother


      • ccsmod2
        ccsmod2 commented
        Editing a comment
        Thank you for reaching out to us. It sounds like you are going through a very tough time and we want to help.
        We’re not legal experts, but we can provide some general information that may be helpful. The age of majority – the age when you can legally leave home – varies from state to state, but is generally 18. Since you are 15, if you left home, your dad could file a runaway report. Running away is not illegal. However, if you are picked up by the police, they will most likely take you back home. You should also be aware that if you are living with your brother, and the police pick you up there, he could be charged with harboring a runaway.
        The way the police handle runaway cases varies from place to place. Especially since you are considering moving in with your brother the police may be unlikely to actively pursue your case. You can call the non-emergency number of the local police department and they may be able to tell you how they handle runaway and harboring cases. If you are not comfortable calling on your own, you can always call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) and we can make the call for or with you.

        You can also call or contact us at any day, 24/7 to talk on a confidential basis. We wish you the best!

    • #5
      Hi, I am 13 almost 14, and I live in Iowa. I recently got out of foster care and moved back with both of my parents. I was wondering if I could move in with my brother who is 27. i don't want to fun away but if that's what it comes to then i will consider it. My father tells me i am worthless and emotionally abuses me. The other night i wanted to go somewhere and he said no. I got angry and yelled at him. He then proceeded to add on and said to my mother and i quote "misty go call the cops because i am done. I don't want to deal with her anymore". Please help me out if you can.


      • ccsmod13
        ccsmod13 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,

        Thank you for taking the time to share your story on our bulletin board. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you with figuring out your next steps in this difficult situation. Asking for help was really responsible and smart of you. We are sorry to hear things are so stressful at home. Emotional abuse is not okay and you do not deserve to be talked down to like that. You deserve to live somewhere that makes you feel safe and supported and it sounds like that could be with your brother.

        From what you mentioned it sounds like you were taken out of your parents' custody for some time and you were recently placed back with them. If your parents are your legal guardians then they do get to decide where you live.

        It can be difficult to communicate your needs with parents particularly when they are unwilling to listen. Sometimes having an adult on your side to advocate for you can help your voice to be heard. A good place to start might be talking more with your brother about you living with him long term. If he knows what you want and need, he can better work with you to improve your situation. If you had a caseworker from when you were in foster care, perhaps your brother can contact that person to ask about how they can support you.

        Additionally, there is an organization called Child Help that advocates for young people in unsafe and abusive living situations. They can explore your options for having a trusted adult or a social worker intervene to help you.

        Please do not hesitate to reach out 24/7 by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at

        Stay safe,

    • #6
      Hi I am 15 going to be 16 in February, my brother is 27 and has his own family and I want to move in with them. My dad and mom never listen to me and are always being mentally abusive forcing everything on me, they also cause my depression. I feel like if I were to move out it would make me a lot happier but my mom wouldn’t let me.


      • ccsmod15
        ccsmod15 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there, Thank you for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you have a lot going on with your family and we are here to support you. You deserve to be in a mutual, respectful relationship and it sounds like you get support from your brother which must be helpful. I am sure your brother appreciates your relationship but if your parents do not agree to you staying outside of your current home with them, the police can bring you back if you were to leave without their permission. We are here to support you here at NRS. If you would ever like help initiating a conversation with your parents, we can help facilitate that by creating a safe space with a conference call. We are also available to listen or chat as well and can be reached at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or Sometimes talking things out with someone can bring about solutions not previously thought of. Either way, we hope to hear from you. Best of luck, NRS

    • #7
      Greetings! I live in a not so legal household with a brother (21) whose done not appropriate things to me, and a mother (47?) whose not in a great mental state nor physical state, same thing with my brother. As a 11 year old I cannot live with this kinda crap, and I don’t feel comfortable here at all.. I’ve talked about it with my sister (1 And she can’t help me with such things but agrees that it isn’t a good place. My brother and mother also do not have jobs or cars, so I am forced to walk 30 minutes to my school everyday. My other brother (27?) Has offered for me to move in with him when he moves, I want to go but my mother doesn’t approve at all. What do I do?


      • ccsmod0
        ccsmod0 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
        While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
        The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. Your older brother could sit down with you and your mom and talk about maybe having you move in with him for a few weeks as a test run. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Which it sounds like may be the case based on what you mentioned about your brother. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
        We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
        Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
        If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
        Be safe,
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