Can I move in with my brother?

[Unregistered]

Hi, I'm 15 almost 16 and I live in Oklahoma. my dad left me when I was young and I have been living with my sister brother and mom since then and my mom shoves religion and political beliefs down my throat but I am completely against her and because of that I am pretty much an outcast. I don't really want to run away but she treats me badly (mentally not physically) and my brother realizes this (he's 22) and wants me to move in with him at his new house but I know my mom wouldn't let me. so is that illegal for me to live with him since he is family and a legal adult?

[ccsmod1]

RE: Can I move in with my brother?

Hello!
Thanks for reaching out to us, it is very great of you to seek for help. Hopefully the information we provide you will guide you in the right direction. We understand how frustrating your situation might be, specially your mom trying to push her beliefs on you.
We are sorry to hear how things are at home, no one should be treated this way. Have you ever tried talking to anyone about what goes on at home, aside from your brother?
We are not legal experts, but we can speak generally and running away is not illegal, however since your mom is your legal guardian she has the right to file a runaway report and if the police find you they will return you home. Although moving in with your brother could be a good idea, it all goes back to your mom being your legal guardian and you would need her permission to be living with your brother.
Hopefully this answer is helpful for you and if you have more questions or want to talk to someone directly you can give us a call anytime at 1-800- RUNAWAY (786-2929). We’re 24/7 and open all 365 days a year. Good luck!

NRS

[Guest]

I need to move out and my brother said in could live with him. I live in Washington and I'm 15. My brother is 18. He can finacially support himself and me. I can't emancipate myself cause I can't get a job because my parents wont let me out of the house. I get mentally abused and my step dad has been dangerous. I've felt unsafe in some ways. My brother ran away and can agree this house is not suitable for me. Can I run away to his house?

[ccsmod6]

Hey thanks for reaching out! We want to do what we can to help. It sounds like you are having a tough time at home and want to do what is best for you. It is great that you have brother for support who really understands the situation you are in. While we are not legal experts, it is not illegal to runaway and you will not get in trouble with the law if you runaway however, if your parents were to file a runaway report, your brother can get charged with harboring a runaway. If you want to know more about your legal rights or help with the emancipation process, you can call Northwest Youth Services at 360-734-9862.If you would like to report the mental abuse that you have experienced you can reach out to Child Help at 1-800-422-4453 or at childhelp.org . If you have any other questions or if we can help out in any other way feel free to reach out by calling us at 800-786-2929, emailing us at [email protected] or chatting us at www.1800runaway.org . Best of luck!

[Guest]

Hi I'm 15 and I'm about to be 16 in April, but my mom left me and my brothers at a young age and well ever since I been living with my dad but now that he found himself a girlfriend none of us live together anymore, my older brother has his own house(he is 19) and well my other old brother(he's 17) lives with one of my dads friends and well me I'm stuck with my dad, and well I really want to move with my brother but my dad doesn't let me and well I was thinking what if I just go and move in with him and i was wondering if it would be illegal to do that but then again I think it's not because he is my brother and well I feel more at home with him then I do with my dad, my dad doesn't want to admit that he only wants me to be with him because of his lady, other than that he just wants to send me to bootcamp and well I don't understand the point of that because all I really want is to live with my older brother

[ccsmod2]

Thank you for reaching out to us. It sounds like you are going through a very tough time and we want to help.
We’re not legal experts, but we can provide some general information that may be helpful. The age of majority – the age when you can legally leave home – varies from state to state, but is generally 18. Since you are 15, if you left home, your dad could file a runaway report. Running away is not illegal. However, if you are picked up by the police, they will most likely take you back home. You should also be aware that if you are living with your brother, and the police pick you up there, he could be charged with harboring a runaway.
The way the police handle runaway cases varies from place to place. Especially since you are considering moving in with your brother the police may be unlikely to actively pursue your case. You can call the non-emergency number of the local police department and they may be able to tell you how they handle runaway and harboring cases. If you are not comfortable calling on your own, you can always call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) and we can make the call for or with you.

You can also call or contact us at www.1800runaway.org any day, 24/7 to talk on a confidential basis. We wish you the best!

[Guest]

Hi, I am 13 almost 14, and I live in Iowa. I recently got out of foster care and moved back with both of my parents. I was wondering if I could move in with my brother who is 27. i don't want to fun away but if that's what it comes to then i will consider it. My father tells me i am worthless and emotionally abuses me. The other night i wanted to go somewhere and he said no. I got angry and yelled at him. He then proceeded to add on and said to my mother and i quote "misty go call the cops because i am done. I don't want to deal with her anymore". Please help me out if you can.

[ccsmod13]

Hi there,

Thank you for taking the time to share your story on our bulletin board. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you with figuring out your next steps in this difficult situation. Asking for help was really responsible and smart of you. We are sorry to hear things are so stressful at home. Emotional abuse is not okay and you do not deserve to be talked down to like that. You deserve to live somewhere that makes you feel safe and supported and it sounds like that could be with your brother.

From what you mentioned it sounds like you were taken out of your parents' custody for some time and you were recently placed back with them. If your parents are your legal guardians then they do get to decide where you live.

It can be difficult to communicate your needs with parents particularly when they are unwilling to listen. Sometimes having an adult on your side to advocate for you can help your voice to be heard. A good place to start might be talking more with your brother about you living with him long term. If he knows what you want and need, he can better work with you to improve your situation. If you had a caseworker from when you were in foster care, perhaps your brother can contact that person to ask about how they can support you.

Additionally, there is an organization called Child Help that advocates for young people in unsafe and abusive living situations. They can explore your options for having a trusted adult or a social worker intervene to help you.

Please do not hesitate to reach out 24/7 by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org.

Stay safe,
NRS

[Guest]

Hi I am 15 going to be 16 in February, my brother is 27 and has his own family and I want to move in with them. My dad and mom never listen to me and are always being mentally abusive forcing everything on me, they also cause my depression. I feel like if I were to move out it would make me a lot happier but my mom wouldn’t let me.

[ccsmod15]

Hi there, Thank you for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you have a lot going on with your family and we are here to support you. You deserve to be in a mutual, respectful relationship and it sounds like you get support from your brother which must be helpful. I am sure your brother appreciates your relationship but if your parents do not agree to you staying outside of your current home with them, the police can bring you back if you were to leave without their permission. We are here to support you here at NRS. If you would ever like help initiating a conversation with your parents, we can help facilitate that by creating a safe space with a conference call. We are also available to listen or chat as well and can be reached at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or www.1800runaway.org. Sometimes talking things out with someone can bring about solutions not previously thought of. Either way, we hope to hear from you. Best of luck, NRS

[Guest]

Greetings! I live in a not so legal household with a brother (21) whose done not appropriate things to me, and a mother (47?) whose not in a great mental state nor physical state, same thing with my brother. As a 11 year old I cannot live with this kinda crap, and I don’t feel comfortable here at all.. I’ve talked about it with my sister (1 And she can’t help me with such things but agrees that it isn’t a good place. My brother and mother also do not have jobs or cars, so I am forced to walk 30 minutes to my school everyday. My other brother (27?) Has offered for me to move in with him when he moves, I want to go but my mother doesn’t approve at all. What do I do?

[ccsmod0]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. Your older brother could sit down with you and your mom and talk about maybe having you move in with him for a few weeks as a test run. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Which it sounds like may be the case based on what you mentioned about your brother. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS

[Guest]

Can I live with my Brother? hi am 16 and I live on a farm with my mom and dad and Two of my brothers and I want to move with my 29 year-old brother because my dad hits me And my mom yells at me for no reason and that’s why I wanna move with my 29 year old bother.

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,

Thanks so much for reaching out. It sounds like living with your parents can be really tough and sometimes scary. You do not deserve to be hurt or belittled by people who are supposed to love and care for you. We understand it takes a lot of courage to reach out, and we are glad you felt safe enough to ask for help.

We are not legal experts when it comes to leaving home, but in most states, a youth must be 18 to be able to leave home without parent's or guardian's permission. It is not illegal to leave home, but parents and guardians are obligated to file runaway reports with the police. This means that if the police find you or you end up in police custody, you could be returned home. There are also harboring a runaway laws that make it so charges can be brought against whoever keeps runaway youth safe. From our general knowledge, these are not used very often.

There are a couple of ways to not be returned home. One of them is filing an abuse report with your local child protective services. There is usually an investigation and your local child protective services may remove you from the home or offer your family resources. Police can help you make this report, or if you gave us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or give us a chat through our website https://www.1800runaway.org/ we could also help you file a report. There is also emancipation. Not every state has this route, and it can be a lengthy and expensive process. Along with the length, youth often have to prove they have a job and a means of living independently. If you gave us a call we could discuss this option with you further or see if there are any free to cheap legal resources in your area.

We hope that by giving you this information you are able to make an informed decision that feels safe and accessible for you. If you need to discuss your options, create a plan, or are looking for any other resources, please do not hesitate to reach out at any time. We are open 24/7/365 and are completely confidential. We hope to hear from you soon!

Best of luck,
NRS

[Guest]

Hi I am Violet . I am 23 years old and my brother is 29 years old . So i was planning to move in to my brothers house as he lives alone. So is ot legal to move in with my brother.

[ccsmod15]

Hello Violet,

Thank you for reaching out to us. It sounds like you’re hoping to move in with your brother and you have some questions on whether this is legally allowed. Although we’re not legal experts, from what we understand, if you are considered a minor in your state or have a guardian assigned to you as an adult over the age of 18, you need the consent of a parent or legal guardian to live anywhere outside of your guardian’s care. If this is not the case, there is typically no legal reason that you would not be able to live with another relative. We encourage you to reach out to someone familiar with the laws of your state if you have any questions relating to your ability to live independently. Most states have local legal aid societies that can help you identify free or low-cost legal services.

If you need help identifying local resources that can assist you, we encourage you to reach out by phone or chat. You can reach us 24/7 by phone at 1.800.RUNAWAY (786.2929) or by chat at our website https://www.1800runaway.org/ . We wish you the very best of luck. Stay safe!

-NRS

[Guest]

Hello, my name is Ros & I'm 11. I kind of get pawned around between Florida & Hawaii. I'm not going to tell you my story, but I have family in Hawaii, Michigan, & Ohio. (Texas too, but that... Probably wouldn't be much better then my current situation.) Can I move out? I know my parents would never allow it.

[ccsmod15]

Hello Ros,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by forum to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS

[Guest]

Hi I am 16 and will by 17 soon can I runaway to a family members house when I am 17 and not be forced to come back also I live in Illinois. My home life is so abusive but only to me and not to my brother so nobody sees anything wrong with it.

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,

You mentioned wanting to know how you can leave home before turning 18. The easiest way to leave home is with your parent's permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parent. The second way is through Child Protective Services. In Illinois you can call 1-800-252-2873 to report abuse (or you can call us and we can do that for you). Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

Please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). You can also reach us through chat via our website: www.1800runaway.org.

Be safe,

NRS

NRS

[Guest]

hello, I'm 14 years old and I wanted to know if I can move with my older brother whos 20 and my little brother who's 12 because we live in a really toxic house and kinda abusive home which we are tired of this so is it possible for my older brother to like be our guardian?

[ccsmod0]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options.
The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you could look into your brother getting custody. Legal aid or the family court would be able to answer specific questions about that process.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS

[Guest]

Hey I’m about to runaway & go live with my brother. My parents beat me naked & also force religions on me that I’m just not ready to process. I’ve been contemplating this descion for a while & I’m finally leaving. They try to convince me that everything is alright with shoes clothes & gifts. But I just wanna be happy. I don’t care about that half mansion & clothes & shoes. I just wanna feel loved & cared about.
I’m 16 but turning 17 in August so oh well.
No one believes me because my adopted dad is the head cop.

[ccsmod13]

Hi, we are glad you reached out to us.

It takes a lot of courage to ask for help. You deserve a home environment where you feel emotionally safe and supported. Most importantly you deserve a home where there is no physical abuse.

We understand that you probably feel very alone and isolated since no one is believing you. We believe you and we want to help.

There are many specifics to consider to determine if running away to your brother is the best and safest option for you (or if a shelter with a transitional living program would be a better option). We would like to talk with you in more detail about your situation at home and some of the other issues like how will you finish school, what your long-term plan would be, do you have a job, will you be safe from your parents.

You can chat with us anytime through our website or you can call our 24/7 hotline to talk more. Our hotline number is (800) RUNAWAY.

We are a non-directive agency-that means we won’t tell you what to do. We go through all your options, help you think about safety and outcomes and identify other resources (for example shelters, youth programs, legal services) in your area to help you with whatever you decide on for your plan. We can conference call to those resources to help you gather information or go through their in take process.

We hope to hear from you soon.

Stay strong,
NRS

[ccsmod2]

Hello There,

Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a really difficult time and we want you to know that you are not alone.

You do not deserve to be abused in any type of way and we are sorry you are having to deal with that. You do have the right to file an abuse report and there are a few ways to go about doing that. One option is to call Child Help at 1800-422-4453 and they would be able to help you file a report. You can also talk to a school counselor and they may be able to help with a report. Lastly, you can call us or chat with us at any time and we can help you with a report.

We know you mentioned running away, we are not legal experts but we do have some information on the laws. If you were to leave home without permission your legal guardian could file a runaway report and it is possible that you could be brought back home. If running away is your best decision you can call us and we can help you look for a safe place to stay.

We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options please give us a call. We are available 24/7 to listen and to provide support.

NRS

[Guest]

Hello, I live in Ohio I am 12 and my parents are divorced, my mom is somewhat of an alcoholic, and can barely live in a house and pay for herself alone. My dad Has 3 other children who are all above 18 now, whom which one he didn’t even raise and didn’t try to reunite with them, and he didn’t start being a parent to the other 2 until they were a teen. My dad hurts me mentally a lot, and has made me think of suicide several times, and he doesn’t believe in technology so much that he hates me for using it all the time, so he wants to try to blame everything on it. It has recently came to my attention that I might be able to go live with my brother in Virginia who has a wife and 2 kids (younger then me) and he is in the Navy, so I think that I might be able to also help with the kids because I am really mature and stuff. I would like to know if I can go live with my brother instead, can I?

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by forum to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS