question about parents permission

[Guest]

first of all im sixteen in virginia; my parents and i have a tense relationship that is full of arguments. the other day my dad told me i could leave the house but i can't expect money or health insurance or anything like that after. hes said this kind of thing before but im always worried that if i actually do leave, he'll call the police. i asked him to put it in writing that i can leave and he does seem serious about letting me leave the house. my question is, since its only running away if you leave home without your parents permission, what counts as permission? what happens if i leave and then my dad suddenly changes his mind and wants me back and i have no idea?

thank you for the help!

[ccsmod4]

Re: question about parents permission

Hi,
Thanks for posting us at NRS.
We're sorry to hear things have been so unsettling at home between you and your parents.
It sounds like you would be willing to leave your parent's home if you were certain they would not just turn around and report you as a runaway. What seems to be causing your conflict with them. It'sa good idea to have permission to leave the house in writing however it does raise the question as to how you will survive without any means of support financially or with no healthcare.
Do you have a plan as to how you will make it on your own? Is there a relative you would not mind living with if your dad signed transfer of gaurdianship papers over to them? How about a friend's parents? We do not have the expertise to give legal advice as to what counts by law as permission to be on your own, but you are a minor and the law does have specifics about
parental responsibilities concerning they're minor children.
Do you think you and your parents can discuss this situation when things are calm and really look into what would be necessary for you to gain your independence? Family court might be an option to apply for emancipation which is a legal separation from one's parent or gaurdian but it does have requirements that must be met. You can give us a call and we can go over those requirements in your state with you also there are Idependent Living Programs that give youth your age an alternative housing opportunity although they too have requirements and rules if you are considering applying to one of these programs and we can talk to you about these options should they exist in your city and state. We would like to hear from you so please consider giving us a call at our 1-800-Runaway 24hr Hotline if you would like to talk about whats going on at home and the options we mentioned.

Take Care,
NRS

[Guest]

Re: question about parents permission

I'd like to go and stay at my friend's house; her mom is okay with it and I can get a job and pay them monthly rent. I'm still going to go to school and am not considering dropping out, I just can't stand living at home anymore. I just want to be sure that my parents won't call the police as soon as I leave the house even though they gave me permission to do so, especially because I don't want my friend or her parents to get in legal trouble. I've considered emancipation but it seems very definite and would take a long time to achieve; I'd be more comfortable just reaching an agreement with my parents to let me stay somewhere else. Is there a legal way to do this?

[ccsmod0]

Re: question about parents permission

We are glad that you have a safe place to stay, and it sounds like your friend's family is willing to help. Unfortunately there is not a guarantee way to ensure that your parents will make a runaway report. With having a letter starting that your parents are giving you permission to leave would help support you if you were picked up by the police or if further legal concerns came up. The letter would be more like a "good faith agreement", where all parties honor arrangements. It can be notarize usually through a bank for it to be more official.

It sounds like you have considered emancipation as a legal option. Yes, it can sometimes be a long process, but sometimes being aware of the requirements can speed up the process a little. Your local family court district would have the specifics of the requirements. Typically, you would have to have a job, continue in school and provide for yourself. It might be help to call the Center for Adolescent Health & the Law at (919) 968-8850 or via email: mailto:[email protected] or view their website at: http://www.cahl.org/index.htm.

Do you feel that your parents would be willing to sign over rights to your friend's mom? If they are willing, then it would be a process that would go through the family courts. We are not sure how longer might take and it would go in front of a judge to determine what is in your best interest. We are not able to give legal advice because we are not lawyers, but you may contact Justice for Children at 1800-733-0059 or you can view their website: http://www.justiceforchildren.org/.

It is understandable that home has become unbearable and in tense for you. We are here to listen and help you with what we can. We are completely confidential if you would like to discuss things in more detail. You can call anytime at 1800RUNAWAY (786-2929) and hope to hear from you soon! Best wishes!


~NRS

[Guest]

I live in Illinois and i was just wondering if it is illegal to know that a 17 year old was going to run away, and then did but you never reported or said anything about it?

[ccsmod9]

Hi there,

Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.

No it is not illegal to not say anything if you are a friend or relative. However if the minor is under your care meaning you are the guardian or parent, then yes you could be found negligent if the teen were to ever report you to child services. However it would mean that the teen would have to report and have someone come out there. It is always best to report because after that you cannot be held liable for anything the teen does since he or she were the ones that ran away.

We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

Be safe,

NRS