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Leaving home without telling parents at 18

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  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We’re sorry to hear that your uncles are so invasive of your personal space. It isn’t fair for them to be interfering in your affairs and your life so severely. First of all, as a legal adult in Texas you are legally entitled to your personal documents- they are your property. If your uncles refuse to give them to you, you can call the police and ask them for a “civil escort” to retrieve your documents. Secondly, as a legal adult in Texas you are legally entitled to live where you please. You can move out with or without a note and they do not have the authority to force you to return home.

    If you want to talk about your situation further or if you have any other questions, please don’t hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hello ,
    I live in Texas i am 19 years old. I live with my uncles and I just can’t live with them anymore it has become toxic and they treat me like a little girl when i’m a college student. They have control over my credit cards , my passport, SSN ( Everything!). My boyfriend and I have been together for a year now and his family offered me to move in with them and I really want to they make me really happy. I don’t know what to do I have been taking clothes to his house little by little without them knowing. But nobody in my family knows i’m doing this. Not even my mom that lives in another country. can I just leave an leave a note?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod8
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello –

    Thank you for reaching out to us here on our public forum. Hopefully you have taken the opportunity to explore the responses on this thread to see if they can help you. It is our thought by helping you during your crisis, that there are others out there going through the same situation can look at this thread and find the answers that they need as well. Of course if you need additional support you are more than welcome to reach out to us via our online chat or our 24/7 hotline.

    Like we tell a lot of our callers and/or people that email us, the laws on that specific subject of just leaving home and/or running away vary from state to state. Now we aren’t legal experts, but what generally what typically happens in each state is if you are below the legal age of majority your parents would be able to make a runaway report in the event that you do run away. In most states, if you are 18 years old or older, you are considered an adult. Now considering the information above, since you are now 18 years old, you would be considered a legal adult in South Carolina and can’t be forced home. Your parents can’t file a runaway report with the police as leaving home won't be considered "running away". Simply just leaving home to live in another location.

    Now if you haven’t told them where you are or have cut all communication with your parents, they can call the police still but to file a missing person’s report rather than a runaway report. It wouldn’t affect you at all though because they don’t normally come up on background checks. You can always go to the non-emergency police and tell them that you aren’t missing. Again, as an adult, you have the right to decide where you live and your parents cannot force you to do anything.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi i am 18 and i dropped out of high school i plan to get my GED and i have a stable place to live i want to leave my house without my dad knowing and without him knowing where im going can i do that in south carolina, i pay no bills here

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like life at home is causing you stress and that you are seeking to live with your girlfriend.

    It must be hard to live with parents you feel do not allow you freedom. While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, your girlfriend and her family could be charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.

    We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi I am 17 I have seizures my girlfriend can care for I need too know if it’s ok I move out at 18 with my seizures my parents are very controlling and I think once I leave the house I will have less stress and be able too live a better life and happier can you please let me know what I can do .

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod4
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,
    Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

    We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We would like to be of assistance to you if we can. It is times like these that would be nice to have a listening ear. It is also important that you remember to exercise self- care. Reaching out to NRS is a nice start. Good for you.
    We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat so that we might learn a little more about your situation and how we might assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm 18, from washington and I have just recently left home. I left a note for my mom and stepdad but I'm still scared of their reactions. My relationship with them wasn't the best but I still feel bad for just leaving without warning. Before I left, I had gotten into an argument with them (which isn't new) but they basically told me they don't trust and I'm the reason why my younger sister is the way she is. I did a lot of things around the house. I cleaned, cooked and took care of our dogs. But to them if I forgot to do one thing it was the end of the world and I was "irresponsible". Though I'm not the best role model for my sister, I always tried to remind her to not be like me. I always encouraged her to do things she wanted to do. I don't know what else to say considering I just left 4 hours ago.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry it sounds like your family is treating you in such an unfair way that is making you feel like you need to leave. Family dynamics colliding with your growing independence can be enormously difficult to deal with. Because you are 20 in Florida, you do have the right to leave and live wherever you would like to. If you have questions about how to exactly approach that sort of conversation with your mother, we would be happy to help you plan for that. If you are interested, you can reach out to us on our 24/7 hotline 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hello I live in Florida and I’m 20. I been working a lot and making myself to the limit I can’t continue I did buy a car but my mother put her name on my car and took my money without my name on the car and also she threaten me about to be like 1 year and forcing me with things I don’t want to be on or with I have my boyfriend he was telling me to move in with him and he’s family, he’s family don’t mind me moving in And they love me also. Me and my family are toxic bring me down and making me feel depressed all night almost every night and yeah I love my mom what she did but the issue is she not leaving me alone and making my own decisions. So what can I do to move out without argue her

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for reaching out to us. It sounds like you have really thought about a plan for how you are going to survive on your own. If you want to discuss the options you listed in more detail you can call NRS at 1800-RUNAWAY. We are confidential, 24/7 and here to help you! Best of luck.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I’m 19yrs old going to be 20 soon, and at the moment I am crashing at a friends place(temporarily). Because my family constantly used and abused me... I don’t mind doing simple little favors, but I don’t get the respect I actually do deserve; instead, I’m treated like... I’m nothing/ a nobody. I don’t want to be submissive, but my part time job is $12/hr. However, minimum wage will go up in 2020, “apparently.”

    Somehow, I ended up taking the risky path in life... Where I somehow succeed on my own; if all my hard-work pays off and luck is on my side for once. Or It could be the last chapter of my life being a tragedy...

    Renting in California/ grow-up decision-making
    1.) move to a different state(job hunting/saving)
    2.) two jobs(could get paid $24 to $30 vs. $12/hrs)
    3.) full time employee( managing to survive/ go to school?... maybe)
    4.) move back with my family(save money, get other/ maybe different job)

    Savings/Employment/Location: Setting on “difficulty” level...

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are in quite a predicament. Because you are 18, you have the right to live where you choose. You do not need your mother’s permission to move out. It’s a little unclear about what you mean when you say she “does not believe you”, but we would be happy to try and help you with that problem if you wanted to reach out and talk more about that. You can call us at 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I’m 18 and a senior in high school. I want to move in with my friend and I also told my mom twice that I was leaving but she doesn’t believe me? I don’t know how else to tell her. I need help

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thanks so much for reaching out to NRS. It’s understandable that you’d be feeling frustrated with your parents and the lack of privacy.
    Although we’re not legal experts, 18 is the legal age of majority in most states. This means that you are considered an adult and do not need your parents’ or guardians’ permission to leave home. So it would be legal to go live with your boyfriend’s family without your parents’ permission.
    However, even if there would be no legal consequences, it’s also important to think through other possible consequences of leaving home as well and make a safety plan. If leaving would mean your parents would no longer support you financially or pay for your education, it’s a good idea to make a plan for supporting yourself long-term. It’s also a smart idea to have a Plan B in case things with your boyfriend or his family don’t work out so you don’t find yourself trapped, or homeless if they kick you out.
    If you think it could be helpful, another option could be asking a counselor, a different family member, or another adult you trust to mediate a conversation between you and your parents to see if they can help negotiate a compromise. For example, maybe your parents would let you see your boyfriend a certain number of times per week, or if you got certain grades. At NRS, we offer a conference call service where a volunteer mediates a conversation between a youth and their parents to make sure things stay respectful and everyone has a chance to be heard. If you’d like to try it out or talk more about your situation, we are here for you 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929.

    Stay strong,
    NRS
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