Leaving home without telling parents at 18

I wanna leave my house but I can’t because I’m 15 gonna be 16 soon ish, and my mom doesn’t ever like let anything go through her it’s always her boyfriend. I hate being because his son sexually assaulted me and my mom pretty much made me see him early when I wasn’t supposed to, even tho it happened Awhile ago seeing him still brings it back. Being here everyday kills me. I don’t wanna live with that

[ccsmod13]

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out to us here at NRS and we appreciate you sharing your situation with us. From what you have mentioned here, your mom may be struggling with health issue and is not seeking out support with this. Witnessing a loved one go through this is incredibly hard, especially if their behavior directly impacts you. It sounds like your mom has made a big life decision and it feels like she did this without considering your feelings which is very difficult. You have a right to an education and you deserve the opportunity to pursue your goals.

Since you are 18 you do have the legal freedom to choose where you live. We can help you make a plan for how to deal with your situation and help you find resources to land on your feet. Having a plan for where you will live and how you will survive once you move out can be very helpful. Moving can be a huge step, and you don’t have to be alone. Some steps you can take towards independence might be to find employment if you don’t have an income, or to save up money for moving expenses. It can also be helpful to research rents in your area, find a roommate, or make a budget. Another thing you might want to consider is what kinds of things you depend on your parents for currently such as tuition expenses for school, or health insurance, and whether they would continue to provide those things after you leave. There may be social service agencies in your area that can help meet some of these needs, such as Transitional Living Programs, a kind of shelter where young adults can live and get services to help them transition to independent living. Please contact us directly by phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) through live chat at 1800runaway.org, so that we can search our database for resources in your area.

We are here to listen and help however we can.  
NRS

Hello! I'm 18 tears old and I'm a senior in high school. my house is goin gto put on auction soon so my mom wants to sell it quickly. With the money she wants to move out into a rural area of our state and live on a farm, i think she's romanticizing what it's going to be like, she's only ever lived in the city. She told me I need to decide if I'm going to stay with her or stay in the city. My whole family is moving out there. I don't want to go with her, but I don't have a job. She even told me I shouldn't finish high school because I won't need it wont the government starts killing us... Like completely insane way of talking but she's dead serious. I won't not graduate high school to live in the middle of nowhere with her. I really hope she reconsiders and just stays here, it feels like the old woman i used to know as my mom has completely disappeared. She doesn't believe in mental health she doesn't believe in medicine. I really honestly think she's sick. When i try and talk about my feeling's it turns into an argument. I feel like I can't talk to her anymore, I stay in my room most of the time because I feel like when I'm around her she's always angry. I spoke to my friend, even my sister telling them I don't want to leave, hoping they would invite me into their home but they just told me "wow that sucks".

Where could I stay so I can finish high school? I don't have a job but I will get one if I need to.

[ccsmod15]

Hello, thank you for contacting us.



It sounds like your mom is making some life changing decisions without giving you many options. It’s understandable to feel overwhelmed when you aren’t able to voice your concerns to her without it turning into an argument. This is a major transition and it’s more stressful when you feel like you have no control over what happens. Moving to the rural area can be even more isolating when you feel like you can’t relate to the people you are around.



It is important to note that you are legally an adult at 18 so you do have options. If education is important to you, there are ways to pursue that outside of a traditional high school setting. You could look into alternatives such as working for your GED. In terms of housing, do you have any trusted adults that you could speak with? If not, you could look into other housing options in your area such as transitional living programs. They can provide youth with housing services as well as assisting in completing your secondary education (high school graduation or GED).



We are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) if you would like to give us a call or contact our Live Chat.

Good luck!

I'm 18 year's old and I'm a senior in high school. My mom couldn't pay back a loan and now our house is being foreclosed. My mom is looking into property in a rural area in my state, which doesn't seem bad when you first think about it but it gets worse.
She doesn't want me to go to school anymore. She wants to get farm animals and raise them and live on a ranch out in the middle of nowhere, when the rest of my family. They're extremely religious to the point where they only want to worship god down there. My mom asked me if i wanted to go or stay here, knowing damn well i would have no where to stay, I don't have a job and school hasn't even started yet. It feels like everything is moving too fast. She's having a walk through of our house tomorrow afternoon, and I don't want to move with her. She told me she wants to hide me away from the world and keep me where no one can touch me. She also believes that the government is going to start killing people on the streets and that the air is poisoning us. I don't know what to do at this point, I refuse to move away and live on a farm, she doesn't even want me to get an education.


I'm feeling so overwhelmed and stressed, I feel like i can't even yalk to her. Everytime I tell her how I feel it turns in to an argument and then she passive aggressively tells me "I'm so sorry you get so upset about god being mentioned". She's been pushing her religion on me since I was little. I love my family, but I know I'm going to lose them through this. She was on the phone talking to someone about property in rural areas. I won't go with her, I refuse to.

[ccsmod15]

Hello! It sounds like you are in such a toxic situation. You deserve to be in a loving and supportive environment and not continue to be put in harms way as you have been. You may love your mom, but she is an adult and is capable of making decision for themselves. She is the only one who can accept help for herself. Being that you are both over the age of 18 you can search for shelters in your local areas using this link:

Homeless Shelters | Find Homeless Shelters | Homeless Shelter Search (homelessshelterdirectory.org)

We are extremely happy and proud of you for taking the necessary steps in contacting us for help. If you would like to talk further with someone about your situation, we highly encourage you to reach out to us at the National Runaway Safeline about your specific situation; we are here to listen and provide support 24/7! Our phone number is 1-800-RUNAWAY and we also have a live chat service via our website https://www.1800runaway.org/.

Hi so I’m almost 19 I live on a bad street with my mom she has substance abuse problems and runs with bad crowds let’s people in the house that should not be like thieves and way worse it’s honestly a miracle I haven’t got worse that having people steal from me she’s a narcissist and refuses any help I try to give her and I want to move I know I should but it’s hard cuz sometimes she’s horrible to me mostly but sometimes she’s nice and I know she will get upset and I don’t want her to die on the streets or anything because she doesn’t have a job and refuses to get one I have people willing to take me in but I can’t let her know where I’ll be and I’m so nervous and kinda scared mostly for her Sorry if this is a little much

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS

I am 17 almost 18 and want to move out when I turn 18. I already have a bought house waiting for me. My only worry is my dad. He's gets crazy when it comes to this and I'm scared of how he'll react. He's threatened to track me down and make me come home and to also get someone to hurt my boyfriend or have him killed. I want me own independence because living with him makes me feel like a bird in a cage. How do I tell my dad im moving out without too much trouble? And how do I not feel guilty? He also has 3 dogs I grew up with and I'm worried he'll get rid of them out of spite if I leave. What should I do and how can I tell him? He's also getting surgery on his teeth around the time I'm planning on leaving and I feel like he's gonna make me feel guilty for that because he always have me take care of the dpgs or wake him for work and make him coffee. I do so much for him like a maid or assistant or a house wife with no thank you. I don't know what to do please give me some advice. Thank you.

[ccsmod0]

Since you are 18 you are more than likely considered a legal adult which means that you can move out if you want to and you won’t be considered a runaway. So the police will not likely get involved, though you could be reported as a missing person. At that point you could just explain to the police you are healthy and safe. As a legal adult, you have a right to make your own decisions about where you live.  We can help you make a plan for how to deal with your situation and help you find resources to land on your feet. Having a plan for where you will live and how you will survive once you move out can be very helpful. It sounds like you have already considered some of that when choosing to live with your boyfrend. Moving can be a huge step, and you don’t have to be alone. Some steps you can take towards independence might be to find employment if you don’t have an income, or to save up money for moving expenses. It can also be helpful to research rents in your area or make a budget. Another thing you might want to consider is what kinds of things you depend on your parents for currently such as tuition expenses for school, or health insurance, and whether they would continue to provide those things after you leave. There may be social service agencies in your area that can help meet some of these needs, such as Transitional Living Programs, a kind of shelter where young adults can live and get services to help them transition to independent living. We are here to listen and help however we can.

Hi I’m moving out at 20 I’m adopted and my parents and I have basically butt heads since the day I was born and im tired of trying to impress them somehow or keep them cordial so im cutting all ties with them including my family im moving in with my boyfriend of 2 years in a completely different state no one knows I’m leaving I have no desire to re kindle a relationship with them or my family everyone is a part of the issue I just want to know can they come after me or somehow find me? I’m 20 years old will the police force me to return somehow?

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by forum to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS

Hi, im 16 in CT if i leave home and tell my mom i'm leaving and where i'm going but she doesn't want me there can i go to jail ?

[ccsmod15]

Since you will be 18 you would more than likely considered a legal adult which means that you can move out if you want to and you won’t be considered a runaway. As a legal adult, you have a right to make your own decisions about where you live and therefore there is no law we know of preventing you from living with a significant other if that is where you wish to be. We can help you make a plan for how to deal with your situation and help you find resources to land on your feet.
Having a plan for where you will live and how you will survive once you move out can be very helpful. Moving can be a huge step, and you don’t have to be alone. Some steps you can take towards independence might be to find employment if you don’t have an income, or to save up money for moving expenses. It can also be helpful to research rents in your area, find a roommate, or make a budget. Another thing you might want to consider is what kinds of things you depend on your parents for currently such as tuition expenses for school, or health insurance, and whether they would continue to provide those things after you leave. There may be social service agencies in your area that can help meet some of these needs, such as Transitional Living Programs, a kind of shelter where young adults can live and get services to help them transition to independent living. We are here to listen and help however we can.
If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe and stay strong,
NRS

Hello, I (Indiana) am going to be turning 18 right after I graduate high school. I want to move in with my boyfriend (Maryland) (will have been together for nearly three years by then). I want to move without my mom knowing and then contact her later when I am stable. She does not allow me to talk to my boyfriend and has contacted police before, no charges were given to him though. If I move out with him can she call the police and have him arrested? I'll be eighteen and old enough to move but I dont know if she can try to get him in trouble. Thank you.