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Im 16 and i want to live somewhere else.

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  • ccsmod1
    replied
    RE: I can't handle living with my family

    Hello,

    Thanks so much for reaching out to us for help. It sounds like you are going through so much with your family right now, and we are here to help and support you in any way that we can. It sounds very difficult to see your mom like this, and to feel like your parents resent you for helping the other parent. It sounds like you are suffering with depression and anxiety yourself. This sounds very painful, and it is understandable that you are feeling confused about what to do. We are here to listen and support you however we can, and we can help talk to you about your options. You said that you are feeling like you are not strong enough to handle this situation and you feel like giving up. That is a very difficult place to be in. If you are thinking about hurting yourself, the National Suicide Hotline could be a great resource for you. You can check out their website, www.youmatter.suicidepreventionlifeline.org, or call 1-800-273-TALK (8255). You are always welcome to reach out to us as well at 1-800-RUNAWAY. It sounds like you are spending a lot of time alone and you don’t have very much support right now, so if you need someone to talk to we are always here for you. Our primary concern is always your safety and we can help you make a plan to stay safe and deal with this situation. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I can't handle living with my family.

    I'm 16. Recently, I have found out that my mom hates my dad. He had an alleged affair for six years. He denies it. I'm caught in the middle; both parents tell me different things. My dad cries. My mom cries. My mom takes white pills hat make her sleep all the time. She sleeps all day. My dad goes to work. My sister goes to school. I stay home (I'm on medical leave, I'm not skipping). For the past few days, I've been managing the house. I cook for my dad and my sister (my mom isn't eating). I clean up a little. I take care of the pets. My dad helps when he is home. He does dishes and laundry and walks the dogs. My mom said she wants to sleep and never wake up. My sister locks herself in her room. I try to reach out to her but I can't hold myself together. I'm always crying. My 16th birthday was on the 23rd, when I found all of this out. Things have been escalating since then. I ended up in the hospital on Christmas Day with an anxiety attack and depression. I fee like giving up. I really can't do this. I'm not strong enough to handle this. I'm scared all the time. My mom smashes things and locks herself in the bathroom. She flooded it and made my dad clean it up. I need to be there for her, but I also need to be there for him. They talk ******** about each other and I feel like they resent me for helping the other. My mom wants to go to Europe for the whole summer but then who will take care of my cats? My dad is at work all day. My kitten, Indy, sleeps in my bed and follows me around all day. Without him, I would be all alone. I have no other family here, the rest of my family lives in Germany. My uncle in Germany is my godfather, but I don't know him that well. I have a duel citizenship and can speak it fluently, but I can't move there while my family falls apart. I don't know what to do.

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  • ccsmod2
    replied
    re: I want to leave home as soon as I can

    Hey there,

    You seem like you are pretty overwhelmed and want to get out on your own. There was quite a bit that you shared so it is understandable that you want to vent. We can't really give you advice or tips on how to run away. But we can give you some general information and things to think about.

    In general, being under 18 you would be considered a minor in most states. So if your family files a runaway report for you there is potential that you would be taken back home if you come in contact with the police. They may also actively look for you, if they are aware of your location. Also, there is a chance that if you are staying with another adult, that they could potentially be charged with harboring a runaway. The consequences for that can range from fines, to jail time. If you are considering running away, you may want to consider how you would survive if you left. It is also a good idea to think of a backup plan in case your initial plans don’t work out.

    It sounds like you are going through a lot at home with your family situation, and you're really trying to make things work. If you do need to vent you can always reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Their number is 1-800-273-8255 and they are also available via chat on their website www.suicidepreventionlife.org.

    For further support, you are welcome to contact us directly at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), and we look forward to your call. Lastly, please note that we offer a live chat via our website at www.1800runaway.org every day from 4:30p to 11:30p CST.

    Take care,
    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I want to leave home soon as I can

    I'm 15 and hate home. I might not be in an abusive household and I know others have it way worse than me but I can't stand it here to the point I'll do anything not to go home. My biggest problem is my dad, he make me feel like s*** constantly, a waste of space, unloved, useless, crap kid, unconfident, self conscious, the lot. It's been going on for about 3 maybe 4 years now and each year my confidence goes down and down. I'm at that point where I don't care if he is my dad, related and all that, I don't like him. I've always loved my mom, I still do, but lately I feel I'm a failure to her because she always makes me feel guilty and nothing I do is good enough. Even when I try my hardest with my parents (especially my mom) i get nothing out of it, no praise, no nothing, like I said, useless in everyday aren't I. I want to live on my own when I'm 16 or if possible now, I know it would upset my mother and my dad would never let me get a word in edge ways about 'why' because all he cares about is himself and his opinion because he always has to be right. But I feel that much hate for my home that I want to leave. If I lived on my own I'd have my freedom, I'd be sensible and I'd be so much happier, smile more, be less of a moody b***, I wouldn't be lonely, I'd have the time of my life and I'd look after myself. I don't know if there's any advice you could give me but if you could that would be great, thank you

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod5
    replied
    RE: Leaving when i turn 16

    Hey there,

    Thank you for being able to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline, it seems like you have been going through a pretty tough time. We want you to know that we are here to listen and to help in the best way that we can. From what you shared, it seems like you are having some troubles with your dad and are feeling unsafe. We are glad we are a resource that comes to mind in this time of crisis.

    We want to start off by letting you know that we are not legal experts here, which means that we are only able to speak in general terms. In most states, if you are a minor, in order to leave home you would need parental consent. If you were to leave without parental consent, your parents would be able to file a runaway report. If one was filed and you were found, typically you would be forced to return home. As we mentioned, we are not legal experts here, if you would like more accurate answers we would encourage you to reach out to your local police department and ask further questions.

    We hope that we were able to help you think a little more about your options and brainstorm some more with you, if you feel like you would still need some more support or go through some more options, please feel free to reach out to us here at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) we are here 24/7. We also have a live chat service which is available from 4:30 PM to 11:30 PM CST. We wish you the best of luck in whatever it is you decide to do and hope to hear from you soon.


    Stay strong,


    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Leaving when i turn 16

    So me and my dad aint going through a really good patch right now and i wanna live with my friend and her mom and dad. The reason that i wanna live with them is cause my dad has gotten drunk and almost hit me and then he has gotten mad and yelled alot. I am terried of my dad and idk what i should do and i really want to live with my friend and her mom.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod8
    replied
    RE: Im 16 and i want to live somewhere else.

    Hello there –

    Thank you for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline on our public bulletin board. From your post, it sounds like you have are going through a very hard time right now at home and seem to be very overwhelmed with everything that has been going on. It’s brave of you to reach out during your time of need. It can be very frustrating to not really get a straight answer from your parents on whether or not you can leave to live with your boyfriend. Hopefully we can help you come up with some ideas on what your next step might be.

    It seems like you have been looking around for some answers to your questions about moving out when your 16 to live with your current boyfriend. Unfortunately, here at the NRS we cannot tell you in definite terms what would happen if you were to leave home without permission because we are not legal experts. Laws on that specific subject vary from state to state, so our advice would be call your local non-emergency police number to get more information on that. Since you are below the legal age of majority (18 in most states), what generally happens; your parents or legal guardian would be able to make a runaway report in the event that you do run away. Since it’s only considered a statues offense the only thing that would happen is that the police will pick you up and bring you back home.

    Your parents may give you permission to live with another family (i.e your current boyfriend), but without getting an official document from the court they would still be legally responsible for you. Which means that they can also take away that permission at any given moment and take you back home to live with them once again while 16 years old. If you were to leave home and live with your current boyfriend, think about what your parent’s might do in that situation. Either give you permission or file a runaway report. Another thing to think about is how long do you think that you would be able to stay with your current boyfriend and his family? Have you thought about some situations where you might be faced with having to leave (i.e break-up, parents decided that can’t support you, have a fight, etc.)?

    If you give us a call on our 24/7 hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) we could help you find resources in your area and could potentially help you brainstorm a possible solution to the issues you are having. We also have an online chat service available every night from 4:30-11:30PM CST that is available through our website (www.1800runaway.org).

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest started a topic Im 16 and i want to live somewhere else.

    Im 16 and i want to live somewhere else.

    Im 16 years old (seventeen in a few months) and I want to move in with my boyfriend. Ive been with him for a long time and I love him very much but that's not the reason, at home me and my family are always arguing, I love my sisters dearly and I adore my parents but my mom sometimes reacts very wrong and my father is very rude to me (emotionally abusive) and has laid his hands on me once or twice. I talked to my mom about staying with my boyfriend for a while (maybe having a schedule - weekends with my family and weekdays at my boyfriends house with his?) and she got very mad but said that she doesn't care. My father told me he wants me out of the house but whenever I say I actually want to leave he explodes and says he owns me until im 18. I don't want to abandon my family or leave forever but I need a good environment because I have my own problems and I need to worry about myself sometimes and have a break from my home. I don't want to run away, that would hurt my sisters. But I don't know what to do and how to get consent to stat with my boyfriend and his family at times.
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