15 and I'm trying to find a way to leave home

[Guest]

So my parents are not physically abusive but have threatened me many times that they are going to punch me in the face, slap the ******** outta me, etc. Being a minor in this household my parents say my only responsibility is cleaning the kitchen. If I leave for the weekend with my parents permission, nobody else keeps up on the dishes so by the time I get back there is a huge pile of dishes with moldy and rotten food and my parents try making me clean them. My parents are constantly worried about me cleaning up after everyone in my household more than my saftey, wealth, or well being. I honestly feel like a slave. My parents are also always complaining about how stupid I am, how much of a ********** I am, how *********** I am, and I cannot take anymore mental abuse. It honestly makes me hate myself and who I am. I wish i could live somewhere else without getting in trouble by the police and without needing my parents permission to live somewhere else.
i have.considered emancipation, running away, and changing gaurdianship without parents permission. My parents are very controlling and I need to be able to do things I wish too as well.
For the past year or so my father has been putting more money into growing pot plants than taking care of my needs. It is hard to get him to buy me a pair of shoes once my only pair has holes in them, it's hard to get him to buy me any clothes i need or school supplies. I have to constantly remind him to buy me the things i need.
if i can find a way to leave this household without parent permission, without me or my friends parents that im staying with getting in trouble, and without me getting introuble with the law, i will try my best to be put on independent studies to finish school and I will also look for a job and get a work permit from my school so that i am not living off of anyone but myself, i will be living with my boyfriend where he stays and will have a way to a job if i get one.
I need help to understand a way around someone getting arrested for harboring me if i decide to leave my parents household and my parents file a report.

[ccsmod7]

Hi,

Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like things are really difficult at home right now. Home should be a place where you feel safe and loved. We are here to help you explore your options.

It sounds like you have been going through a lot at home with your parents and some of their unfair expectations of you. It must be really frustrating always having to be the one to clean up after your family. You do not deserve to be threatened by your parents or for them to speak negatively towards you. You deserve to be respected and loved by your family. One option is to report the emotional/verbal abuse and neglect going on at home. If you chose to do this, you could contact Child Protective Services or tell someone at school that you trust, what is going on at home. Another option could be to speak with a school counselor to get some extra support with everything.

With all this going on at home, it’s understandable to be looking for options on how to leave. It sounds like you have done a lot of research of some of your options. While we are not legal experts, if you were to runaway from home without your parent’s permission, they could file a runway report. This would mean the police, if they found you, would be required to return you back to your home. Another possibility, which you asked about, is the laws around harboring a minor. For example, if you chose to stay with your boyfriend, without your parent’s permission, he could get in trouble for harboring minor. The consequences of this could be jail time and/or a large fee. Run away laws and harboring minor laws are in place to help protect youth, so there are not ways to get around them. If you wanted to make sure your boyfriend or someone else doesn’t get in trouble for letting you stay with them, one option would be to get your parent’s permission. Another option would be to see if your parent’s would give you permission to stay with a family member.

Some other options you could consider would be youth shelters or transitional living homes. You mentioned that you would like to get a job and stay in school, to help take care of yourself. Transitional living homes are for youth in similar situations that want to leave home and are trying to figure out how to take care of themselves. They can offer lots of services for job skills and counseling, in addition to providing a safe place to stay and meals. You have many options available to you.

If you would like further help exploring any of these options or others in more detail, please feel free to reach out to us directly by calling us at 1-800- RUNAWAY or chatting with us live on our website at www.1800.runaway.org. We look forward to hearing from you.

Take care,
NRS