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17, Utah, wanting to move into a friends place

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  • #16
    Hey I’m from tooele. My parents don’t ever get along and always bashing me down and I hate it so much. My self esteem is so low and I have bad depression.Sometimes I don’t wanna be here anymore and I feel like everything is my fault because my parents never get along.My house is too toxic and im so tired of it. I am a 16 year old wanting to move with my cousin in salt lake.What can I do?

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    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thanks so much for reaching out. Sounds like you have a really tough home life with your parents; sounds really horrible.

      As for moving to be with your cousin, the law in the vast majority of states, including Utah, has the age of majority as 18. This means that in the eyes of the law, you’re an adult at 18 and can make decisions independently only then. Until that time, your parents are your guardians. If they would allow you to move and sign paperwork that your cousin can be your guardian, you could go live with your cousin.

      A couple of options to think about if moving now doesn’t seem possible: you may want to consider getting treatment and support for your depression. When you’re depressed, everything seems impossibly hard. Reaching out to another adult or social worker at school is a good way to approach this. The more you are able to talk about what's going on and focus on your strengths and what you can control, the better things will get.

      If you want to chat further, please don’t hesitate to reach out to the National Runaway Safeline at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We’re here 24/7 and are available to talk in more detail about your situation and what you’re struggling with. Good luck.

  • #17
    Hello, I have a boyfriend who lives in South Carolina currently and he flies down to Utah to visit me. He's 17 and we were wondering if he could live with me here in utah to get him away from his mom. She's a heavy drinker and although she dosen't hurt him, she acts as though she dosen't ever care about him. Would there be a legal issue with him living with me? We want to do it, but not if we'd be going against the law

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    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hey there,
      Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. That sounds like a really frustrating position for both you and your boyfriend to have him feeling unwanted at home by an alcoholic mother. He doesn't deserve that, and its understandable that he would want out and that you would want to help.
      The unfortunate thing is at 17 in South Carolina he is still a minor and as such his mom could still report him as a runaway. If he was found police would be able to detain him and hold him until mom picked him up or found another way to get him back home. If he was found with you and your family its possible anyone over 18 in the household could get charged with harboring a runaway which can be a fine, jail time, or community service (or all three). If though you did still risk it and he successfully stayed hidden from police until he turns 18, the runaway report would become a missing person report and no longer would he be forced home or you risk harboring charges.
      One thing to keep in mind would be your ages and living together though. Depending on Utah's age of consent living together when one of you is 18 and the other is not might trigger statutory rape charges for the older one, even if your relationship has no physical intimacy since there is an assumption of it.
      If you want to chat further, please don’t hesitate to reach out to the National Runaway Safeline at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We’re here 24/7 and are available to talk in more detail about your situation and what you’re struggling with. Good luck.

  • #18
    i’m 18 and i’m moving out in a few months. i’m too scared to tell my parents because they’re extremely protective. i’m not able to see my friends or boyfriend much and at home they blame everything on me. i’m moving out with two friends. what should i do to make it not so difficult.

    Comment


    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on with you getting ready to move out. As a legal adult, you have a right to make your own decisions about where you live.  We can help you make a plan for how to deal with your situation and help you find resources to land on your feet. Having a plan for where you will live and how you will survive once you move out can be very helpful. Moving can be a huge step, and you don’t have to be alone. Some steps you can take towards independence might be to find employment if you don’t have an income, or to save up money for moving expenses. Another thing you might want to consider is what kinds of things you depend on your parents for currently such as tuition expenses for school, or health insurance, and whether they would continue to provide those things after you leave.

      We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please contact our 24/7 crisis support line either by phone or chat.

      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

      We hope to hear from you soon.

      Be safe,

      NRS
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