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  • Moving into friends house at age 17.

    Im a 17 year old and plan on moving into my friend's house for my specific reasons and my friend's parents and my parents are consenting to this arrangement and all I need to know is if there are any actions i need to take to make it legal or if I can just move in whenever.

  • #2
    RE: Moving into friends house at age 17.

    Hello there –

    Thank you for taking the time out of your day to get into contact with us here at the National Runaway Safeline on our public forum, we are always here to listen and here to help in any way that we can. Hopefully by supporting you there are other that are reading through this thread that can relate can feel helped as well.

    Now like you might have read on our other threads is that we aren’t legal experts, but what generally what typically happens in each state is if you are below the legal age of majority (18 in most states except Alabama and Nebraska [19 or upon marriage], and Mississippi [21]), your parents would be able to make a runaway report in the event that you do run away. Since it’s only considered a statues offense and not a crime to run away, the only thing that would happen is that the police will pick you up and bring you back home. There is no legal “paperwork” or “actions” that you have to do in order to leave the house, the only way to legally move out of the house is to do it when you reach the age of majority.

    Your parent may give you permission to live with another family (i.e with boyfriend’s family), but without getting an official document from the court transferring custody your parent would still be legally responsible for you. Which means that they can also take away that permission at any given moment and take you back home to live with them once again.

    Hope that this information helps! Best of luck to you.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      I'm 17 and I want to move in a friend house but my parents said I couldn't until I'm 18 what do I do

      Comment


      • ccsmod0
        ccsmod0 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello,

        Thank you for contacting us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you and your parents do not agree that you should live with a friend. It could be a good idea to talk to your parents about you wishes. Perhaps you can consider using our conference calling service, this is a service where you would call us and we would hold a conference call between you and your parents to talk about how both sides are feeling. We would serve as mediators, we are not here to necessarily choose sides but rather help come up with a solution that would make the situation at home better. This might be helpful to you if you have concerns about your parents not listening or not being open to hear what you have to say. If you feel like this is a service that you would find useful you can give us a call and one of our trained liner will be happy to assist you.
        If you would like to talk more about your options, you are more than welcome to give us a call and we can explore all options. 1-800-786-2929 we hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: We care what you think
        Best wishes,
        NRS

    • #4
      Ok. I'm 17 years of age and I want to move out because of reasons, but what does it take to get out of parents house and into my friends house. Me and my friend already made plans for me to move in long time ago but I'm not sure what the best approach would be .

      Comment


      • ccsmod9
        ccsmod9 commented
        Editing a comment
        Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know it can be a difficult time and more over a hard time at home where you are supposed to feel safe and protected. We just would like you to know that we are here to help and listen the best way we can.
        From what you have given us so far you are still considered a minor in most states. This means that your parents have the right to call in a runaway report and report you to the police. From there if the police knew where you were or if they ran into you they would have to bring you back home. If you were to run away to your friend’s house he or his parents would be charged with harboring a minor which in most states comes to hefty fine but again varies with every state. There are loop holes that exist when running away such as if you are within 6 months of turning 18 and you run away most police will not file a report because it is simply too close to you 18th and therefore not worth it to have you on there for so little time. However if you feel threatened at home or not safe please know you have the right to report whatever abuse is taking place. You will be heard and proper action would be taken. If you happen to run away and need resources please do not hesitate to call or use our chat option. From there we can talk about Transitional Housing, Shelters, Food Pantries, etc. All this in order to help you stay safe and off the streets.
        Whatever you decide, we would love to hear from you. We are a safe place to talk about difficult stuff like this. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY and we are totally confidential and available 24/7.
        Take care and stay safe,
        NRS

    • #5
      I am 16 and am thinking about moving in with a friend. Things have gotten hard at home and my parents want me out of the house anyway. If I had my friend pick me up and take me to his house (He lives with his parents and they are okay with me staying a while) would this cause any legal trouble?

      Comment


      • ccsmod2
        ccsmod2 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello There,
        Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to listen and here to help with your situation. It sounds like you are going through a really difficult time right now. If your parents gave you permission, it may be okay but we are not legal experts. You may be able to stay with your friend under certain circumstances. Because you are under 18 there would need to be adult supervision in the home. Also you would still need to be attending school otherwise you could be seen as truant, which could potentially have legal issues. If you do not have your parents permission, we can go over runaway laws. If you were to leave your home without your parents permission, they have the right to file a runaway report. Running away is not a criminal offense, it is a status offense. What that means is you may get a ticket or fine, ot the police may just bring you back home. You most likely will not be arrested for running away.
        We hope this information was beneficial to your situation and provided you with useful information. If you would like to ask more questions or discuss your situation in further detail, do not hesitate to give us a call or chat with us we are available 24/7. We wish you the best of luck in your situation!
        NRS

    • #6
      Hi I'm 18 years old and I'm having issues with my parents regarding where can I choose to live they keep controlling my actions I want to move to my friends house what can I do?

      Comment


      • ccsmod7
        ccsmod7 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there, thanks for reaching out today. In most states the legal age where you become an adult and can make your own life decisions including where you live is 18. The 3 exceptions to this are: Alabama (19), Nebraska (19), and Mississippi (21). So if you live in any other state you are free to go and your parents cannot report you as a runaway. You might leave a note or contact them after leaving to let them know you are safe, if they don't know that you willingly left on your own they can file a missing persons report for you afte 24-72 hours.

        One thing to consider before leaving is how you are are going to support yourself if you have been relying on your parents for finances or other basic needs. If you need any resources or would like to talk over your plan please do not hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat us.

        We hope this information helps. Please call or chat us if you would like to talk through your situation or have more questions. We are here to listen, here to help.

        Best,

        NRS

    • #7
      Hi, I'm turning seventeen this school year and I've had a lot of rough stuff at home. My dad physically abused my brother for years and my mom controlled my father and all the rest of the kids. My mom and dad split up recently and are now deciding to divorce. Due to financial reasons and custody, they BOTH plan on moving to another state. I want to stay with a friend so I can avoid my parents and continue going to this school for the duration of my senior year. I am a little concerned about asking this friend and talking to my parents about my decision, how can I do this?

      Comment


      • ccsmod5
        ccsmod5 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi! Thank you for your message. It looks like you've reached out to us through one of our other platforms, so we will respond there. Feel free to call if you have any questions, need resources, or someone to listen!

        --NRS

    • #8
      I’m 17 years old my parents live in a one bedroom apartment and there’s four of us living in here me and my little sister sleep on the couch will I be counted as a runaway if I go live with a friend and my parents don’t consent of it ?

      Comment


      • ccsmod15
        ccsmod15 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there
        Thank you for contacting us at the National Runaway Safeline. It takes a lot of courage to reach out for help and we are glad that you decided to reach out to us.

        We are sorry to hear that you are going through such a hard time at home. You shouldn't have to live like that. If it might be an option for you, you could consider filing an abuse report by calling Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 and they can help you provide information on filing an abuse report.

        Leaving home can be hard in many cases and it can be helpful to think about where you might stay and how you might pay for food, rent and other living expenses. While we are not legal experts just speaking generally, if you are to leave home without your parents permission the police can bring you back and whoever you are staying with could be charged with harboring a runaway. However at 17 laws can be flexible and in some states it may be ok to leave without your parents permission. The best way to find out what might happen is to call the local police department in your area. In most cases if you are to leave home with your parents permission to a safe place there won't be a police report and you may be fine.

        All of this can be hard and we are here to support you through this hard time. If it might be an option for you, you can call us at 1-800-786-2929 and we would be happy to listen to you, explore your options and provide any resources.

        You are acting strong by reaching for help before taking any steps. We wish you the best and hope to hear from you soon.

        Best
        NRS

    • #9
      my parents dont want me in the house but they also wint let me leave. what do i do

      Comment


      • ccsmod3
        ccsmod3 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,
        Thanks for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline and sharing a little bit about what is going. It takes a lot of courage to reach out and especially in a time where you have a really tough and complex situation. It can be difficult to know how to talk to your parents and express your feelings about how you are feeling. We would encourage you to reach out to a trusted adult, teacher, relative, and friend that you can talk to and potentially help you mediate a conversation with your parents about your current situation. At NRS, we do offer a service call conference calling, where you can call into our hotline and then we would reach out to your guardian and help advocate for you, help you express the needs you have to your parents.

        We are here for you and will support you in anyway that we can. Please feel free to call into us directly as we can talk further about your situation and find resources that are best for you in your area. Stay strong and you are not alone in this! Our hotline ( 1-800-RUNAWAY) and chat are open 24/7.

    • #10
      I live in New Jersey. Does anyone know where I could move to in New Jersey?

      Comment


      • ccsmod2
        ccsmod2 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello There,
        Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to listen and here to help. New Jersey is a big state and it would be difficult to tell you where you could move to without knowing your city. One option is you could see if you could stay with family or friends. Another option is you can call or chat with us and we would be provide you with shelter and transitional living resources.
        We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and provide support. Best of luck!
        NRS

    • #11
      i’m 17 and my parents are letting me move out with my friend but there saying there not going to let us get an apartment since i’m 17 and he’s 18 would we be able to get an apartment at my age since i’m not legally 18 yet?

      Comment


      • ccsmod9
        ccsmod9 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We are not legal experts but from what we can gather you can rent an apartment but you would have to have cosigners (his parents or yours) in order to sign the lease. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
        Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
        If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
        We hope to hear from you soon.
        Be safe, NRS

    • #12
      im 13 and i would like to move in with my 18 year old year cousin, Is this allowed??

      Comment


      • ccsmod0
        ccsmod0 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We are not legal experts but generally speaking a person is not considered an adult until they are 18. This means that their guardians are legally responsible for them. So the parent is required by law to provide for the youth (food, shelter, school, etc.) If they fail to do so then they can face legal consequences. This also means that the youth cannot live anywhere else without parents’ consent. There are exceptions to this rule but those include getting the court involved such as emancipation or Child Protective Services removing the parent’s rights.
        We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We hope this helps.
        Be safe,
        NRS

    • #13
      I’m 17 years and 2 months old, and my parents are going through a divorce at the moment. As well as other occurrences around the house, I’ve decided that it’s best for me to move out into a friends house. I have a part time job and will be entering my senior year of high school next year. My parents will definitely not give me permission to move out so I do not know how I can achieve moving out.

      Comment


      • ccsmod2
        ccsmod2 commented
        Editing a comment
        Thank you for reaching out to us. We’re sorry for how your home life is right now. Have you already asked your parents if you could stay at your friends so you can avoid the stress of the divorce on you? You’ve mentioned you have a friend who you could stay with. Do you have any close family members who live nearby? Would your parents give you permission to live with them? If you can’t stay with your friend could you talk with your parents about how things could change at home so you would be satisfied staying there?
        Again, thank you for contacting us. We know how difficult it can be when one is trying to figure out your options. If you would like to discuss your situation further please feel free to call or chat with us. We’re here to listen, here to help.

    • #14
      I am 13, and I need to move into my friends house with his parents. I mainly live with my mom, but visit dad on weekends. My mom doesn't accept me, and she doesn't provide what I need. I don't know how my dad will feel, and I don't want to permanently move in with him. I've talked with my friend about this, and his parents are good with me moving in. I just don't know how to get my mom to let me leave without filing for a runaway or a missing person.

      Comment


      • ccsmod15
        ccsmod15 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi,

        Thanks so much for explaining your situation. We understand that sharing what’s going isn’t always easy, but the fact that you are reaching out for help means that you have already taken a major first step.

        Not being accepted by your mother must be difficult. You should know that you deserve to be accepted and loved. It’s wonderful that you have such a good friend whose parents are willing to let you move in. But you are correct that, because of your age, your mother may opt to file a runaway report.

        We are not legal experts at the NRS, but it is quite likely that if you run away, and your mother files a runaway report, the police will take you home. Especially if your mother knows that you are at your friend’s house.

        That does not mean that you don’t have options. One option would be to talk directly with your mother about what you’re feeling, and ask if she would mind if you spent some time staying with your friend to blow off some steam. Another option would be to speak to a counselor or teacher that you trust at school about what you’ve been going through, and seeing if they have any suggestions or advice. A third option available to you is speak with your dad about what’s been going on, and see if he has any thoughts or advice.

        A fourth option would be to simply run away to your friend’s house. While this is a potential option, you should understand that running away carries its own risks and potential consequences. While running away is not itself a crime, it is a status offense due to the fact that you are a minor, and the police may take you back to your mom’s place. Your friend’s parents may also be liable for harboring a runaway, which can be a crime. If you decide to run away, you want to make sure that you have considered the possible consequences. For instance, how will you survive and support yourself? What are your long term plans? Are you prepared for the potential consequences with your mother if you need to return home? These are all questions you’ll want to consider if you decide to run away.

        One additional option you have is to call us directly at 1-800-786-2929 and to talk through your situation in greater detail. You can also IM with us through the chatroom on our website at www.1800runaway.org. We are available 24/7, and with a better understanding of your situation, we can help you make the best plan to deal with your situation.

    • #15
      Hi. I'm 15 years old and I would like to move in with my one of my bestfriends. I'm a girl and hes a guy but hes like a brother to me. His mom takes in kids that have been kicked out by there parents or just need to leave because of there at home situation. There is a girl that lives there now who's 18 and she first moved in when she was 17. I want to know how I can move in because my parents are split and I'm pretty sure they wouldn't want me moving out of the house at this age. But I have my reasons. They were not the best at raising me and there raging alcoholics. When I was younger my mom payed no attention to me and used to strap me into a car seat in front of a TV and leave me there for hours. And my dad hes been abusive in the past. I just want to know how I can move out for good without being reported as a run away. (I've ran away twice but never longer than a day because my dad always found me somehow.)

      Comment


      • ccsmod1
        ccsmod1 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hey there,

        Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. Running away is a big decision and it can be very stressful to figure out what you want to do.

        You mentioned some things about your dad acting abusively in the past that raises concern for your safety and well-being. Absolutely no one deserves to be abused. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. If any harm or abuse is happening at home, you have the right to report it. If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering. It may also be a good idea to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.

        You brought up that both of your parents are alcoholics. It can be really hard to live with someone who struggles with an addiction to alcohol. We want you to know that you are not alone. If you’d like to talk to other young people who are dealing with friends or family members who have drinking problems you can check out Alateen. You can find more information about this support group, or find a local meeting here: https://al-anon.org/newcomers/teen-corner-alateen/.

        We aren’t legal experts here at NRS, but generally speaking, if you do opt to leave your home your parents can file a runaway report, which is essentially a missing person report. Running away is a status offense; this means that it isn’t illegal, but it’s something you can’t do while still a minor. If a runaway report is filed and you are located by the authorities you will most likely be returned home. If there is abuse at home and you disclose it to the police they may let you stay where you are but would be required to contact CPS to open an investigation.

        If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

        Stay safe,
        NRS
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